The Bible favors prevention versus cure. Abortion is a cure for the problem of sexual immorality. Funding for AIDS is the cure for the sin of homosexuality. Welfare is the cure for the sin of pornography that lead to the illegitimate children that leads to the need for welfare. [...]
I favor Democracy, Christianity and Capitalism as a check and balance to each other. Democracy allows choice, Christianity defines the proper choice and Capitalism takes care of those who do not make the proper choice. Democracy, Christianity and Capitalism has made America a great nation and should be an example for every nation of the world. [...]
If you would like assistance with the promotion of Democracy, Christianity and Capitalism I would direct you to Franklin Graham and Jerry Falwell as trustworthy Christian men with a world vision.
31 comments
Aaaaargh! The utter stupidity! IT BURNS!!!!
That welfare / porn / sin triangle is toooooo fucking much!
And his/her/it's complete inability to understand the inherent conflicts in the status quo above brings a whole new level of absurdity, top only with the surreality of the last paragraph.
Faaaark!
My mind is still boggling over how we allow choice, but only the choice that the government/Christianity has already made for you...
"Oh yeah, we're a democracy. You can vote on whatever you want on this ballot. Oh, the ballot only has one choice? Oops."
I'm also enjoying the correlation between porn and illegitimate children. I know every time I watch porn, I get pregnant out of wedlock and have to go on Welfare for a while, myself.
@Clirus
Welfare is the cure for the sin of pornography that lead to the illegitimate children that leads to the need for welfare.
Wha-?
You're a fucking idiot.
Oh, he means "takes care" as in the Mafia use of the phrase, as opposed to the more conventional usage (as in actually caring). I see now - I actually initially read it as saying Capitalism looks after people who make the wrong decision, hence my confusion.
So... there is no actual choice involved, just the illusion of choice? Sounds great to me.
And if the bible perfers prevention over cure, explain the flood. God could have just stopped corruption instead of resorting to genocide. You do claim he is all powerful after all.
Wow, this rating system needs to go higher. A mere 5 just can't encompass such incredible piles of insanity as this.
There will probably be something along very soon to eclipse it, but I'd just like to give this one a "soft" nomination for a Fundie Bizarro Universe Award.
~David D.G.
Married couples get abortions too, you moron.
AIDS is spread by unsafe sexual activity, not specifically homosexual activities, you moron.
Pornography doesn't create "illegitimate" children, you moron.
"Democracy allows choice"
At least in theory, this is true
"Christianity defines the proper choice"
Slavery, misogyny, genocide, murder, rape... these are all the proper choices?
"Capitalism takes care of those who do not make the proper choice."
"Takes care of" in what sense? A welfare and charity sense, or "takes care of" in a Sopranos sense?
"I would direct you to Franklin Graham and Jerry Falwell as trustworthy Christian men with a world vision."
Yeah? I don't think these guys are shining beacons for democracy, Xianity or capitalism.
This reminds me of a couple of my favorite Jerry Falwell quotes:
"If you're not a born-again Christian, you're a failure as a human being."
-- Rev. Jerry Falwell
"Grown men should not be having sex with prostitutes unless they are married to them."
-- Jerry Falwell
That welfare / porn / sin triangle is toooooo fucking much!
Oh, I dunno. It reminded me of that one Sunday Bloom County strip (I think it ran during the period the cast went on strike) wherein W.A. Thornhump showed a diagram blaming unions for Communism, Khadafy, sin and hemmorhoids.
"Invisibly Bitchslapped by Adam Smith Award!"
Interesting thought - strictly speaking, do the invisible market forces we all have so much faith in qualify as a religion? I have a feeling they're so tortuously complex and chaotic that no definitive analysis might even be possible. Certainly no one's figured out a way to predict or fully understand it yet, otherwise he would very quickly and noticably become massively more wealthy than everyone else, assassinated, or both.
How many times, heterosexual people get AIDS too!
And pornography doesn't make babies.
And i like your reasoning with the Democracy/Christianity/Capitalism. You can choose what you like, but the Church tells you what to choose and you get 'taken care of' if you make the wrong choice.
<<< Interesting thought - strictly speaking, do the invisible market forces we all have so much faith in qualify as a religion? I have a feeling they're so tortuously complex and chaotic that no definitive analysis might even be possible. Certainly no one's figured out a way to predict or fully understand it yet, otherwise he would very quickly and noticably become massively more wealthy than everyone else, assassinated, or both. >>>
I would classify it more along the lines of meteorology and climatology than religion - a science that is incompletely understood, in no small part because of its chaotic nature (there are so many different factors that guarantees of accuracy are impossible - not only can we not quantify every one of those factors to figure their effects, we likely don't even know what all of them are).
More heterosexuals today contract AIDS than homosexuals.
Abortion is the cure for faulty contraceptives.
How did you get from pornography to welfare? Rich people consume it too, ya know, although with them it's "natural children" not "illegitimate children".
Capitalism is the worship of the dollar, it's the epitome of the Golden Calf. What does the Bible say about that?
Jerry Walwell? Trustworthy? Not in this reality.
"The Bible favors prevention versus cure."
Okay then, explain why your god had to "cure" the evil of the world with a flood. Explain why your god is going to "cure" the evil in the world again. As you formulate your answer, remember that according to your mythology, your god could have prevented the need for all of this by not putting one certain tree in one certain garden for no other purpose than to tempt people.
As for the rest of your rant, your understanding of how the world works is far too simplistic to be taken seriously.
It is important to note that Christianity (the Bible) is a polar opposite to democracy. Look it up fundies, the Biblical system, praised and reinforced by your God and Jesus has no democratic values.
Methinks you have no idea what a democracy is.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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