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Quote# 13409

Jesus is in charge of the Strong Nuclear Force that holds protons together within the nucleus of atoms - (Colossians 1:17).

Thus, when the time comes, Jesus is simply going to relax His hold on the elements (of the Periodic Table), and the protons are going to fly apart - (2 Peter 3:10,12).

AV1611VET, Christian Forums 40 Comments [7/30/2006 12:00:00 AM]
Fundie Index: 6
Submitted By: clemsecon
WTF?! || meh
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Vyoma

Atom smashers make baby Jesus cry.

7/30/2006 12:11:27 PM

MD20/20

Wow, protons in the Babble....first I heard of it.

7/30/2006 12:16:17 PM

Hadanelith

Hint for you: Physics existed before Jesus. Realize the philosophical and historical ramifications of what you say, before you say it, asshat.

7/30/2006 12:17:29 PM

Anna Ghislaine

I looked these up, and Colossians 1:17 is \"he [Jesus] is before all things, and by him all things consist.\" I don't see how one gets from there to the strong nuclear force.

II Peter 3:10 and :12 are just about everything flying apart and melting (I can't be bothered to type it out). It does say \"the elements shall melt with fervent heat\", but melting is not the same as nuclear fission. Furthermore, the 'elements' as the term was understood then were earth, air, fire and water.

7/30/2006 12:37:26 PM

Mister Spak

What about the color force? Will Jesus relax
his hold on that too?

7/30/2006 1:36:12 PM

Pike

It's amazing how they have no problem just making stupid stuff up.

7/30/2006 1:57:30 PM

Papabear

When is Jesus going to relax his hold on your mind? Of course, it seems your mind is flying apart already,

7/30/2006 2:30:31 PM

Blue

So why doesn't God just vapourise all the homosexuals?

7/30/2006 2:47:03 PM

Jacob Syne

Go breathe in a lungfull of Chernobyl!

7/30/2006 3:05:36 PM

g-21-lto

And God is in charge of the electromagnetic force, and the Holy Spirit is in charge of the weak nuclear force. Gravity is rotated among the archangels on a millenial basis.

7/30/2006 3:13:44 PM

ND

Sure glad that I didn't have a mouthfull of coffee when I read that shit.

7/30/2006 4:10:13 PM

NotMe

Science 101: Goddidit, and if he didn't, Jesusdidit

7/30/2006 4:19:24 PM

Amigone201

Jesus relaxes his hold and all the protons come falling out. Don't forget to wipe, Jesus.

7/30/2006 5:00:04 PM

Napoleon the Clown

Fundie+Science=Bastardized \"science\"

7/30/2006 7:54:54 PM

Mister Spak

Fundie + science = bdeebdeebdeebdee

7/30/2006 11:34:38 PM

Sandman

Wow, it's a discussion between JohnR7 and AV1611VET on the Christian Forums.

That's like watching Mike Tyson debate Paris Hilton on the validity on non-Euclidian quantum theory.

7/31/2006 1:13:26 AM

Kyle

#63071

There is no logical or reasonable connection between Col 1:17 and physics. What AV1611VET is doing here is removing the verse from context, and then free-associating. It's a technique that lots of fundies employ in order to \"find\" predictions and prophecies and extraordinary knowledge in the Bible.

7/31/2006 3:33:15 AM

JadedRevenge

And before Jesus, atoms didn't stay together...

7/31/2006 4:39:40 AM

Maronan

AV1611VET isn't Jack Chick, is he? His bastardization of science is ludicrous enough to qualify him, and Chick does believe Jesus holds atoms together, since he claims gluons don't exist and are believed on \"faith.\"

7/31/2006 9:49:45 AM

David D.G.

Man, fundie \"science\" gets weirder and funnier every day. It's getting so bizarre now that I hardly bother getting disgusted anymore; all I can do is laugh.


~David D.G.

7/31/2006 11:07:42 AM

Julian

Oh! What? So that would be exactly like they DIDN'T for three days when he died?


7/31/2006 1:39:01 PM

McCulloch

Fear this: Quantum Christianity!

7/31/2006 4:33:01 PM

Blind Watchmaker

Oh, no! Is Dark Energy of the devil?
The Rupture is coming!

7/31/2006 10:20:40 PM

Irene

My husband's commentary:

\"A bib bib bah blah bloo what?!?\"

Captures the essence, I think.

Irene

8/1/2006 2:04:41 AM

tracer

Chick does believe Jesus holds atoms together, since he claims gluons don't exist and are believed on \"faith.\"


And here's the proof: Big Daddy?

Inspired by Kent \"Dr. Tax Dodge\" Hovind.

8/3/2006 12:12:55 AM
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