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Quote# 13409

Jesus is in charge of the Strong Nuclear Force that holds protons together within the nucleus of atoms - (Colossians 1:17).

Thus, when the time comes, Jesus is simply going to relax His hold on the elements (of the Periodic Table), and the protons are going to fly apart - (2 Peter 3:10,12).

AV1611VET, Christian Forums 40 Comments [7/30/2006 12:00:00 AM]
Fundie Index: 6
Submitted By: clemsecon
WTF?! || meh
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Redhunter

Always hilarious AV1611VET. (raises cup of cheap beer in a toast)

8/14/2006 6:48:00 AM

Matilde

The best quotations ever!!!!

8/26/2006 11:03:59 PM

Julian

Damn - this bastardisation of the bible from the guy who claims the KJV is inerrant (and that if there's a conflict with reality, reality is wrong)

8/27/2006 1:48:28 AM

Toga

Heh, Looking at 2 Peter 3:12:

12as you look forward to the day of God and speed its coming. That day will bring about the destruction of the heavens by fire, and the elements will melt in the heat.

Ho noes, Heaven's dead.

12/16/2006 7:14:31 PM

Adrian

I am defiently you made those quotes up. The elements in the real passage refer to the outdated alchemical elements of fire, air, water, and earth.

12/28/2006 7:16:58 PM

Robbie

God damn it.

You're like a fucking child!

1/7/2008 3:43:22 PM

Jack Bauer

So how do you explain natural decay and nuclear fission?

Is Jeebus losing his grip?

1/7/2008 6:13:43 PM

Gnomist

Which new bible is this?

1/7/2008 7:40:49 PM

ninjacat

Wait....what?

1/7/2008 9:46:50 PM

Moondog

He is before all things, and in him all things are held together. (Col. 1:17) It would appear from context the writer wants to say Jesus is a part of everything and everyone.
But the day of theLord will come like a thief, and then the heavens will pass away with a mighty fire, and the earth and everything done on it will be found out. (2 Peter 3:10) Looks like we don't know when the end will come (if ever), something to keep in mind when the fundie death cult starts in about the Rapture.
And, of course, You shall not bear false witness... (Ex:20:16) Fundies should remember that before mis-quoting and lying like this.

1/7/2008 10:21:05 PM

aaa

Nuke 'im!

1/8/2008 11:54:54 AM

Quantum Mechanic

*headdesk*

1/8/2008 12:06:59 PM

643 66 666

Wouldn't that destroy Jesus as well? And heaven seeing as it contains a lot of gold? And the rest of the Universe?

8/7/2008 4:07:07 PM



Jesus is a quantum confinement to nucleons. Makes more sense then the trinity.

11/15/2012 6:32:30 AM

Anon-e-moose

"Jesus is in charge of the Strong Nuclear Force that holds protons together within the nucleus of atoms - (Colossians 1:17)"

Colossians 1:17: 'He is before all things, and in him all things hold together'

Nope, not verbatim I think you'll find. But going by your logic, AV1611VET, Let's take as an example, Judges 1:19, and 'reinterpret' that:



The British Challenger II. American M1 Abrams. French Leclerc. German Leopard II. Israeli Merkava. Russian T-90. Chinese Type 99. North Korean Pokpung Ho. A whole lot of Iron in the Steel used in the construction of these particular Chariots, m'boy.

I guess that's why he daren't show his face round these parts, eh?! >:D

11/15/2012 8:14:28 AM
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