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(In response to "What exactly did Jesus mean when He said "I am coming soon" and similar phrases? Well, looking at the calendar, I see it's at least 1,800 years after these scriptures were written. Clearly, this is not "soon" in any modern sense of the word. Thus, I'm asking: What does "soon" mean in these verses?)

Your question, is one which has been around for quite some time. I can remember hearing it when I was a kid back in the 1950's, (and yes there are some of us that old still around).

All Scripture is quoted from the King James translation, unless otherwise noted.

We as mere humans seem to not be able to understand what time is, and that it has no function in eternity. Time was created by God in Genesis, as a way of dividing his labors into segments.

Genesis 1:5 And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.

Genesis 1:8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.

If you will; notice in Genesis 1:5, that God called the light which he had created day and the darkness which the light divided he called night. It is also noteworthy that he began his first day and all following with the darkness beginning the day. The darkness of the first day is Eternity before God created the light.

Genesis 1:1 through 4 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. 2 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. 3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light. 4 And God saw the light, that it was good: and God divided the light from the darkness.

So therefore Creation began some where in eternity, but we actually have no time reference as to when since, that first night was eternity. It is also cogent to notice that God divided the light from the darkness. This brings up another controversy, in how can you have both light and darkness at the same time, and the only answer I can come up with for that is:

Mark 10:27 And Jesus looking upon them saith, With men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible.

So our definition of time is not the same as God's, with God a day can be just as long as he wants it to be, but with us a day can only be twenty four hours long. We as mortals have to fit things neatly into a package of our making, but with God he is unrestricted, and we need to conform to him and he is in no way compelled to conform to our concepts of either time or space.

As an example in Genesis which God must have given to Moses, He says:

Genesis 3:14 And the LORD God said unto the serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou art cursed above all cattle, and above every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life:

and

Genesis 5:4 and 5 And the days of Adam after he had begotten Seth were eight hundred years: and he begat sons and daughters: And all the days that Adam lived were nine hundred and thirty years: and he died.

Notice that in these Scriptures God's use of the phrase;(all of the days) even though Moses has substituted years.

With God there are no such thing as years, or decades or centuries, or for that case not even millennia, there is only undivided eternity. All divisions of time other than days are a creation of man, and as an example a month on the current Calendar can be 28 days, 30 days or 31 days long; but the Hebrew calendar, which predates our calendar, all months were 30 days long. Man has so completely confused the division of time that eternity has no real concept anymore, and man appears incapable of comprehending such a thing as not having an alpha and omega.

As a consequence; whether the Scripture means either quickly or soon, that time period is determined by God and not by us.

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Confused?

So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!

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