MAUDE FLANDERS: Will somebody please think about the children?
6/19/2006 8:11:59 AM
If your god cared about children he wouldn't have killed thousands of them in the Old Testament.
3/29/2008 6:14:30 AM
If your silly myth fails you, rewrite it!
So much for not changing anything in the bible!
3/29/2008 3:03:22 PM
Hey everybody! When our fairy tales fail(in an epic, humiliating manner), let's quietly rewrite them and hope no one will notice or read that particular fable!
By the way, David, you basically said that your god is weaker than some kid's parents.
8/9/2010 2:12:28 PM
I'm also sure the parents of these children would not allow it.
What? You want to go on a boat ride with that crazy old drunk? Now? Hell, no, you're not. You aren't even getting into that flimsy big box full of elephant shit. If it even floats, which I doubt, you might wind up in fucking Turkey, f'mithrasakes, and how will you ever get home, huh? Walk? Swim? Bullshit. Go fix the leaky roof like your father told you to; looks like rain.
8/9/2010 2:27:37 PM
Fuck, just how big was this bloody imaginary boat?
Or maybe the parents were scared the dinosaurs on board would eat their children.
8/10/2010 4:06:27 AM
"There were multitudes and multitudes of tiny little children, and [God] knew they had never done him any harm; but their relations had, and that was enough for him: he saw the waters rise toward their screaming lips, he saw the wild terror in their eyes, he saw that agony of appeal in the mothers' faces which would have touched any heart but his, but he was after the guiltless particularly, and he drowned those poor little chaps."
- Mark Twain, Letters from the Earth
6/7/2012 9:04:23 AM
"O daughter of Babylon, who art to be destroyed; happy shall he be, that rewardeth thee as thou hast served us.
Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones."
- Psalm 137:8-9, KJV
Face it king, your god hates the little children, all the little children of the world.
6/7/2012 9:11:48 AM
No one's really sure because the measurements are given in cubits and no one seems to remember how big a cubit was. It's said to be the length of a man's forearm from finger tips to elbow. Of course, a cubit measured by Michael Jordan is going to be different from a cubit measured by Verne Troyer.
6/7/2012 3:43:51 PM
non-biblical concept. report to hell.
6/7/2012 4:01:43 PM
Your god is a sadistic sociopath unworthy of worship.
6/8/2012 12:38:52 AM
@ Crimson Lizard
Ah, Letters from the Earth. It should be required reading, period. I read this maybe 50 years ago, and though I enjoyed it, as I do all of Mark Twain, I see now how little I understood it then. Thanks to FSTDT and seeing the insanity of fundies I am enjoying the letters immeasurably, now. Thanks for the suggestion. The last time I read it there were no computers. Now everybody can read it on line, for free, and keep it handy.
He is a marvel -- man is! I would I knew who invented him.
6/8/2012 1:29:59 AM