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Quote# 2977

[Arguing that God has a white beard]The reasoning that I used is this: God made man in His image, and men, naturally, grow beards; Jesus took on human form as a Jewish man, and ascended to Heaven in the form of a Jewish man; it was a DISHONOR for a Jewish man not to have a beard - therefore, Jesus had a beard during His ministry and also after His resurrection, and when He ascended to Heaven (it can be assumed that Jesus has kept the appearance with which He ascended, excepting that His hair is all white now, apparently [Revelation 1:10-16]); it can be assumed that if Jesus' HAIR is all white, His BEARD is also; God the Father is said to have hair "like pure wool" (Daniel 7:9). Therefore, it is most likely (almost certain) that God has a beard (it is practically certain that Jesus has a beard), and that it is white. We do know, though, that both God the Father and Jesus have hair white as 'pure wool'.

Godsword, FStDT! Guestbook 15 Comments [5/1/2003 12:00:00 AM]
Fundie Index: 0
WTF?! || meh
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PirateFaafy

And therefore, since women were created in the image of man, they should probably grow beards too. :D

7/21/2008 4:52:22 AM

apYrs

also circumcised. Like Jesus was.

7/21/2008 12:42:42 PM

El Guapo

The question is, HOW does God wear his beard? Probably not a goatee or a van Dyke, but also probably not one of those crazy neckstrap beards. I bet his beard is like Santa's.

What does everybody think?

7/21/2008 2:59:22 PM

Princess Rot

Shaun the Sheep would like his coat back now, Jeebus.

7/21/2008 3:34:41 PM

Boadicea

There are a lot of *BROWN* and *BLACK* sheep as well. Their wool grows that color. Heck, there are even *GRAY* sheep.

So God's beard is like "unto pure wool"? Which color, then?

7/21/2008 5:20:46 PM

Ranger Joe

God has a Soul Patch. Duhh :D

7/21/2008 5:25:54 PM

Harry

Odd there's no mention of nose hair.

7/21/2008 5:50:25 PM

mike-mike

Then god must be a weak and pathetic creature because the human bady is really flawed.

7/23/2008 6:19:16 PM

Philbert McAdamia

So do god have a nappy head? Sheeit, yall mufuckas be gettin ya asses capped, Jim.
Or is he Jewish? he sent the boychick down in the image, yes? Oy, such knocks you're in for.
And there's aging in heaven? Damn, the 3-in-One must be all wrinkled and shrivelled to just about zip by now, down to about the size of George Burns.

"The reasoning I used is this..."
Bwaaaahahahahahaha

7/23/2008 6:28:53 PM



Ok, good luck explaining how women enter in the equation, as well as the 2/3 of the world who doesn´t have those features.

1/1/2010 5:29:15 PM

vaguelyhumanoid

WHITE HAIR WAS A METAPHOR!
GOODNIGHT!

6/19/2010 5:02:26 PM

Elia

Now we're arguing about what color god's beard is supposed to be. What next, eye color? Hook nose vs. button nose?

6/19/2010 6:42:48 PM

Nowonmai

So, you're saying you God is Jewish?

And I have seen 'pure wool', and let me tell ya, it's not white. Not by any stretch of the imagination.

6/19/2010 7:12:38 PM

Gore

So Jesus... was an albino?

6/19/2010 9:50:46 PM

Anon-e-moose

"God made man in His image"

God is Morgan Freeman. Or a cute tsundere anime girl:



[/smartarse]

6/21/2010 9:36:11 AM
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