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Quote# 31665

Okay a very interesting story, someone was talking about the "unforgiveable sin", well my mind starting cursing by itself at the holy spirit, and I went DEAD COLD, I was just in shock! It is quite difficult to control demons, but I rebuke them with Jesus Christ Laughing I thought God forsake me and I was going straight to hell...


Well I asked God to show me a sign or anything if he still loves me, and guess what!!! My cat that was lost for over 5 months was found, and my nintendo DS games which I thought my step brother stole I found!!!

AMEN TO JESUS CHRIST!!

DevonR, thewaythetruth.com 47 Comments [11/27/2007 5:58:51 PM]
Fundie Index: 1
WTF?! || meh
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Cabal

Dude, God hates you, the DS sucks

11/27/2007 6:02:42 PM

Mudflappus

My advice to you is to start drinking heavily. Forget that you're only 14 years old, there's nothing a whiskey colonic won't cure (including demons). I can say that I asked God for my virginity back and what do ya know! I can ask for unverifiable stuff too!

11/27/2007 6:06:34 PM

szena

I just tried cursing the HS and nothing happened. Nothing at all.

Maybe you went "dead cold" because you believed you had done something horribly wrong, not because anything actually happened.

11/27/2007 6:07:50 PM



Why did God steal your cat and hide your video games in the first place? He sounds like a bit of a dick to me.

11/27/2007 6:07:53 PM

Andrew

A missing cat and some video games next to the finishing sock under your bed. That's your sign from God?

weak.

11/27/2007 6:13:12 PM

Jake Steel

your rebuking demons and you still live with your step brother wtf?!

what the heck kinda DS games do fundies play anyway?

11/27/2007 6:13:34 PM

Old Viking

You're on a roll, DevonR. The world's poor, deprived and starving can damn well wait till God has you squared away. (And even then they're not likely to get anything.)

11/27/2007 6:17:41 PM

Michael

Well, AMEN, BROTHER! Praise The LORD! GLORY! HALLELUJAH! Jesus brought your cat home, and he found your DS game! Praise Him!

Meanwhile, in the time it took you to write that sentence 30 children either died of curable diseases or malnutrition in Africa. Dozens of innocent men, women and children were killed in various wars.... Don't you thing your Jesus should be a little more concerned about THAT rather than finding your DS Game? Dumbass!

11/27/2007 6:24:51 PM

Cabal

I think he's got an awesome quote right there ->

11/27/2007 6:30:08 PM

HeathenAngel

So while jebus made your cat come back and your DS games appear, magically... a family in Darfur grieves the loss of another child, the victim of starvation. Gotta love the priorities of that worthless messiah of yours.

11/27/2007 6:58:09 PM



Yes...a cat and a DS proves that the invisible sky pimp loves you

11/27/2007 7:03:08 PM

Sideshow Bob

o.O?

I wonder if he's met James Sager?

I wonder if they should be introduced.

11/27/2007 7:09:23 PM

Mike

Troll or

Correlation does not equal causation.

11/27/2007 7:27:08 PM

Thundersqueaks

The miracles of mundanity.

11/27/2007 7:27:57 PM

Athar

I once asked satan for magic powers. He just hung up on me!

11/27/2007 7:55:14 PM

esrz22

@Cabal: I must defend the DS. It is a most wonderful system.

11/27/2007 8:01:28 PM

Classic

Originally posted by Cabal

Dude, God hates you, the DS sucks


A far more evil and wicked fundie has insinuated itself onto this website.

I AM MAKING THE ANGRIEST FACE!!!

11/27/2007 8:39:37 PM

Brian X

God has a plan for your life, DevonR. It's called Klonopin.

11/27/2007 8:41:14 PM

Jon

God's really always been about the little things in life. Restoring your faith by giving you back your cat and video games seems like such a valid use of his power, doesn't it?

11/27/2007 8:48:17 PM

Blackvoice

I think you had an aneurism.

11/27/2007 9:00:37 PM

Rhys

You lied. That story wasn't at all interesting.

11/27/2007 9:17:35 PM

King Duncan

Random things are scary! Other random things happened, so praise God!

11/27/2007 10:15:22 PM

Orca

Your mind started cursing by itself without any prompting by you? So what, do you have some sort of strange, undocumented form of Tourette's Syndrome? Or do you just have no control over what you think?

Either way, you don't have anything to worry about. I heard that God is a bit more lenient with the mentally ill.

11/27/2007 10:18:18 PM

Damen

Sorry, Devon, but it was teh DEBBOL!!! that brought back your cat and games. He did it to lul(z) you into a false sense of security.

YOU ARE GOING TO HELL!!!

11/28/2007 12:56:57 AM

apYrs

"my mind starting cursing by itself at the holy spirit,.."

sorry honey, your mind is you, it doesn't do things by itself, so the only demon involved is you.

You're baaad

11/28/2007 1:26:09 AM
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