I think I speak for everyone when I say \"If shit's flying around your room on its own you need to move out of tornado country.\"
5/23/2006 12:48:00 PM
And how often has this happened to you? When you weren't on acid, that is.
5/23/2006 2:37:29 PM
Wow - so Satanists can actually exorcise dickheads!
5/23/2006 10:05:26 PM
this is a classic... it should definitely be rated higher (pity the link to the original thread doesn't work any more, though)
5/26/2006 1:40:24 AM
Napoleon the Clown
What are you on and where can I buy some?
5/26/2006 4:15:14 AM
Satanists do not believe in Satan or God.
They believe Jesus was just a prophet.
So shouting satan will cause them to mock you.
They believe Christians are stupid, and stupidity is the greatest of their sins.
Hooray for wikipedia!!! (and a friend who is a satanist)
1/12/2007 6:53:37 PM
We can't really be sure they were satanists anyway. that's like a fundie blanket term for catholics, athiests, democrats, scientists...cats, etc. Regardless, if they have telekinesis, I'm interested.
1/12/2007 8:16:57 PM
Okay, first of all, I don't even KNOW of any Satanic chat rooms, and I'm intimately familiar with all the sites on theistic Satanism out there.
But yes, if you went into one and started preaching, I wouldn't be surprised if they did start cursing you, casting spells on you, and praying for your death. Satanists have a significantly lower tolerance for fundie bullshit than other groups do, for reasons I feel are obvious.
If things start flying around your room, though, you're probably on acid. Or off your meds.
1/12/2007 8:47:16 PM
The worst thing is many of them believe satanists can do just that on a whim.
2/23/2007 11:46:23 PM
If you come upon someone cursing and muttering incantations and things are flying around the room...
It's just me trying to figure out how to hook up this fucking stupid new DVD player!
2/24/2007 1:47:54 AM
Try going to a satanic chatline and see how tolerant they are when you mention 'Jesus'.
Well, erm, if they are satanists they probably don't want to hear your crap.
2/24/2007 11:57:14 AM
2/24/2007 12:24:33 PM
After they curse you and cast spells on you and things start flying around your room...
Man, I've got to find myself one of these satanic chat lines and start going off about Jesus!
2/24/2007 12:29:46 PM
I want to be a Satanist now so I can use long-range telekinesis for practical jokes.
3/6/2008 8:25:33 PM
Sounds like Satan gives you cool powers.
3/7/2008 12:50:45 AM
You, with all your "god" are afraid of satanists and their powers online? If their curses are so strong, your faith must be weak.
3/7/2008 1:15:03 AM
only because they expect Christian to act like intolerant jerks, good job reinforcing that.
3/7/2008 7:52:45 AM
Lying is still a sin, kid.
3/7/2008 10:04:27 AM
Things flying around the room? I expect the were chunks of your scanadalised brain, that self destructed at your stupidity.
6/10/2008 3:35:35 PM
By any chance, were the 'things flying around your room' flys?
6/10/2008 4:02:54 PM
Go onto a Christianity chat, and question the current definition of a biblical passage. See how fast you get your sorry ass banned.
Oh...and I'll call bullshit.
6/10/2008 4:41:22 PM
try talking about jesus outside the context of trying to convert and/or banish to hell. people might then be more tolerant.
6/10/2008 5:21:13 PM
What's this? Why didn't Jesus come stop that stuff flying around your room? Were there iron chariots involved?
6/11/2008 4:49:40 AM
I'd like to meet this satanists. I don't believe in your christian god, so why can't I acquire some kewl magic powers through another deity?
3/19/2012 4:13:31 AM
Lying to impress the other fundies. I'll wager this asshat has never been anywhere near a Satanic website of any kind - too afraid the demons will get him through the computer screen or something.
5/1/2012 8:38:29 AM