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Quote# 33058

[Reviewing the film Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium]

Sexual Immorality (S)
The only content applicable to this investigation area is Natalie Portman wearing a dress that exposed a large gap over her chest. Such a display of skin normally not seen is clearly sexual: clearly intended to tease, to incite lust in the male viewer. If she had worn a dress that covered the gap, the Sexual Immorality investigation area score would have been 100. Sure, some highfalutin, high society performers wear such clothing for such affairs, but does that make such a cultural-specific display acceptable? If you think "Yes" then the fact that some cultures eat other people makes it acceptable since it is a cultural-specific behavior. Don't argue with me about what is morally acceptable. Argue about it with God. He will give you a much better Answer than I ever could. [1Cor. 8:9, Matt. 5:28]

Tom Carder, Capalert 62 Comments [1/1/2008 3:10:20 AM]
Fundie Index: 2
Submitted By: GoFast
WTF?! || meh
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Joe

Have you ever seen those Natalie Portman paparazi pics where she's on the nude beach? :D

1/1/2008 3:11:39 AM

Natanya

I'm amazed I haven't seen Capalert on here more often.

1/1/2008 3:28:47 AM



I hope you didn't do a Pee Wee Herman.

1/1/2008 3:43:17 AM

Euclid

@Joe:
No! Post them immediately, or you shall burn in hell (or something).

1/1/2008 3:44:39 AM

ninjacat

How the....

1/1/2008 3:46:30 AM

√ėyvind

If she had worn a dress that covered the gap, the Sexual Immorality investigation area score would have been 100.

I think you get bonus points for covering up your ankles. Oh, and if you wear a cross, you get 60 points and unlock a secret level and the password to a Christian flash game site!

Don't argue with me about what is morally acceptable. Argue about it with God. He will give you a much better Answer than I ever could.

I'm at a loss as to how to contact the man. Churches advice me to establish telepathic contact by sitting in a certain posture and folding my hands, but try as I might, I could not get the guy to answer (big surprise there).

1/1/2008 3:46:30 AM

werewolf

Mr. Carder has deeply rooted personal issues, I think, with dresses of the plunging neckline variety. He seems to associate such with cannibalism.

However, he may be right. Natalie Portman does look good enough to eat.

1/1/2008 3:53:43 AM

Mike

Burkahs for everyone!

1/1/2008 3:55:22 AM

Lunalelle

Oh no, women have skin on their sternum. *gasp*

1/1/2008 3:57:30 AM

approximate

Does this guy need a hooker or what?

1/1/2008 4:00:33 AM

dworkin

Ms Portman could incite lust in a burka.

1/1/2008 4:03:08 AM

Jacob

I already won that argument by default.

1/1/2008 4:06:45 AM

Jacob

Dworkin - HA! Funny and true.

1/1/2008 4:07:16 AM

Rubyfruit

Natalie Portman could incite lust wearing a burlap sack dress and a paper bag mask.

Yeah. On that note, where does wearing a plunging neckline lead to cannibalism?

1/1/2008 4:08:15 AM

J-Hay

LMFAO!!!

1/1/2008 4:10:48 AM

James

If I ever meet god, I will. Until then remember what Jesus would do.

"If thine eye offend thee, pluck it out."

1/1/2008 4:26:26 AM

solomongrundy

Kylie Minogue in the 'Dr Who' Xmas special did more to incite lust in this particular male viewer ;-)

1/1/2008 8:59:27 AM

Sir Michael L. Foley

In fact, I did ask God. He said you're wrong and that Natalie Portman is a babe and one of His gifts to men.

1/1/2008 9:05:34 AM

fromdownunder

Boy, I would have loved to see him do a review of Leon (The Professional) - which Natalie did when she was 12.

Norm

1/1/2008 9:08:20 AM

Osiris

First Corinthians? So Paul is God now?

1/1/2008 9:20:01 AM

Whiteshark

I thought capalert was a parody site (in the same vein of Landover Baptist) for crazy fake fundie movie reviews. If so why is it here?

1/1/2008 9:20:42 AM

Jeremy PC

@ Whiteshark No, it seems he's for real.

1/1/2008 11:07:58 AM



Because she wears a dress that is totally normal in our times and in the fifties nightdresses do you say it's inmoral?, WTF?

1/1/2008 11:29:19 AM



Next time you consider the Quest for the Fire or any Documentary from National Geographic "inmoral", because in that culture women go naked, let us know.

1/1/2008 11:31:10 AM

Mister Spak

I hope so beacuse your answer is worth shit.

1/1/2008 12:37:30 PM
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