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Quote# 33914

[From the same thread as his other recent gold nugget - in response to the mocking comment, "Don't you know that a shield of faith gives us protection against a nuclear strike. Unless the other side is more faithful than us..."]

Maybe you're not that familiar with the Bible. But let's just say that if you understand Scripture, you understand that if you are in GODS favor you don't have much to worry about as far as enemies go.

9/11 doesn't happen if we were not a bunch of "Girls Gone Wild" and singing "Back that A@@ up" while men dance lewdly on a float wearing womens lingerie and throwing condoms into the crowd.

Yes, our shield of faith would be a shield against demonic attacks/ nuclear attacks. God simply would protect us. No man or demon can do anything to you if GOD is your Shield!!! Amen!

Mock if you want, that just means your Biblically illiterate.

ShieldofFaith, Christian Forums 70 Comments [1/21/2008 9:36:45 PM]
Fundie Index: 5
Submitted By: RealityCheck
WTF?! || meh
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#387265
bunbuns

So, everyone that died in 9/11 were "girls gone wild" and singing immoral songs, etc, etc....?

How about a nice cup of shutthefuckup?

1/21/2008 9:42:02 PM
#387267
approximate

I have a .3006.
You have a "God Shield".

Let's take a walk in the bush and test your assertion.

1/21/2008 9:43:34 PM
#387276
Øyvind

Yes, our shield of faith would be a shield against demonic attacks/ nuclear attacks. God simply would protect us. No man or demon can do anything to you if GOD is your Shield!!! Amen!
Then explain how the USSR could defeat Germany, or how godless North Korea can still exist when Christian U.S.A. decided to defeat it.

1/21/2008 9:52:58 PM
#387282
anevilmeme

A true believer in every sense of the word. Beyond hope, this one is.

1/21/2008 9:57:30 PM
#387283
solomongrundy

Gott Mit Uns, anyone?

1/21/2008 9:57:52 PM
#387298
Anon

And if you spell "you're" as "your", you're just regular-illiterate.

1/21/2008 10:10:48 PM
#387299
Detrs

It's "you're" fuckwit. I'd rather be biblically illiterate if it meant I was literate about everything else.

1/21/2008 10:11:09 PM
#387313
Doctor Whom

Your shield of faith is also supposed to protect you against getting sick, and we know how well that one works.

1/21/2008 10:23:16 PM
#387315
Durane

@ = s?
Or is the song "Back that Aaa Up"?

1/21/2008 10:25:38 PM
#387320


Thats what the armies that defended Jerusalem from the muslims that wanted to retake it believed. They died.

1/21/2008 10:30:22 PM
#387329
toothache

Blaming pornography for 9/11. Using an atrocity to mindlessly proseletyse is grounds for going straight to hell-if god were just, that is.

1/21/2008 10:37:22 PM
#387332
LabRat

Shield of Faith should know better than to go off his meds

1/21/2008 10:41:26 PM
#387333
xplicit_UK

Funny that, Norway's got 70% atheists, Sweden 85%, Germany 50%, yet they never got struck with a terrorist attack on the scale of of 9/11, I guess "Allah" is trying to tell you something ;-)

1/21/2008 10:45:14 PM
#387336
Nowonmai

Here, hug this nuke while praying, see if you don't incinerate.

1/21/2008 10:47:28 PM
#387337
AnonymousAsshole

"that just means your Biblically illiterate."

Biblically illiterate is better than functionally illiterate.

Although, there is no cure for stupid.

1/21/2008 10:47:41 PM
#387339
Choad

For some reason, that reminds me of this: http://www.cbc.ca/fifth/main_miracles.html

1/21/2008 10:48:45 PM
#387352


Following your logic, the whole humankind has been biblically illiterate.

1/21/2008 11:09:45 PM
#387355
JustinGG

That Jesus guy was crucified right?

1/21/2008 11:12:40 PM
#387356


And how has he "protected" those Amish girls who were killed by a madman?, or the poor Palestinian or the Israeli, or Lebanon, for that matter, who suffer attacks all the time?. Or Thailand or Indonesia or those countries devastated by the Tsunami, complete ethnocentric illiterate?

1/21/2008 11:12:52 PM
#387367
Ben

My shield is lead by Nick Fury. Is yours?

1/21/2008 11:37:31 PM
#387371
Osiris

Or you know, he's doesn't exist and shit happens.

1/21/2008 11:51:51 PM
#387372
MM

My Biblically illiterate what?

1/21/2008 11:54:48 PM
#387378
Septic Sceptic

"OH NOES! TEH NOOCLEER BOMS R FALLING!

And my lifetime of listening to secular music has caused me to forefit any immunity (from ionizing radiation interfering with cell division) that I may have otherwise enjoyed!

Just look at those Christians skipping merrily through the fallout! See the joyous children of the faithful catching particles of gamma radiation on their tongues like snowflakes! Observe too, the religious leaders talking casually about how warm it is today, as they stand unharmed in the ten million degree blast!

Curse you, rap music and pornography! My only regret is that I could not watch you get wiped out in the explosion before my own eyes melted in their sockets!"

Is that how you picture it panning out, Shield?

1/22/2008 12:11:05 AM
#387382
Ambrielle

Is he saying the True Christians(TM) never die because gawd protects them?

1/22/2008 12:13:48 AM
#387387
Caustic Gnostic

...you understand that if you are in GODS favor you don't have much to worry about as far as enemies go.

I read that a bit differently. As in, g0d loves watching a bloody good fight between his various believers.

1/22/2008 12:19:02 AM
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