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Quote# 34077

[Someone took exception to the FSM.]
You Atheists think you have got it all figured out huh? So you THINK you know that there is no God so you make up this ridiculous fake religion. The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster? COME ON!! As if making fun of Christians for believing in God wasn’t bad enough you have to mock us by making up The Flying Spaghetti monster? Yeah, I know that an atheist made this crap up, because no one is stupid enough to actually believe Pasta is our Almighty God. This is totally wrong and whoever started this is seriously going to pay unless you repent. Because if you don’t, you and all your believers are all going to burn in HELL for eternity. So pick up a Bible, and READ IT!!

Sincerely,
A Strong Christian

henderob, Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster 63 Comments [1/24/2008 8:03:05 PM]
Fundie Index: 5
Submitted By: Moondog
WTF?! || meh
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Fed Up

Obvious troll.

1/24/2008 8:05:13 PM

Papabear

You Fundies seem to think that atheists reading the Bible will make us into Christians. Many of us became atheists BY reading the Bible.

You miss the point of the FSM. Pasta being a deity is just as likely as the God of the Bible actually existing.

1/24/2008 8:08:55 PM

anti-nonsense

At least he understands that the FSM is a joke.

1/24/2008 8:10:24 PM

Mark

If you know why you reject the FSM as a god, you will know why we reject your god.

1/24/2008 8:14:29 PM

Amanda

You know, there are a lot of atheists that have read the bible. Usually that is the reason they are atheists. I read the bible, and I liked a lot of parts. I especially liked the story of Noah's Ark. However, I believe that that's what they are- stories.

1/24/2008 8:16:02 PM

Freboy

You make your God look bad.

1/24/2008 8:21:52 PM

Osiris

I read the Bible. The thing is that I didn't read it, I READ it. You see the difference. I didn't just look at the words and pretend I understand Jacobian English. I actually read it, compared it to other parts of itself and other accounts at the time and I always asked questions. I approached the Bible the same way anyone approaches anything that claims to be true; with an open yet skeptical mind. And with this regard the Bible fails miserably. And hence why atheists exist.
The FSM is a joke. Good job figuring that out. However it is meant to make fun of creationists and intelligent design. Obviously if Christians get their religion taught as science it only opens the door for more religions in jump on the bandwagon, no matter how insipid they are, and thereby making a mockery out of the scientific process. Because what's the point of explaining and learning about gravity when you could just believe in Intelligent Falling?

1/24/2008 8:25:46 PM

Mister Spak

"because no one is stupid enough to actually believe Pasta is our Almighty God. "

So close and yet so far award.

1/24/2008 8:33:15 PM

GigaGuess

Uh-huh. *yawn*

1/24/2008 8:33:49 PM

Chef Boyardee

Are you telling me that I've been worshipping a false idol? Oh the humanity.

1/24/2008 8:40:08 PM

John

You Fundies think you have got it all figured out huh? So you THINK you know that God is a big, white male in a long beard so you make up this ridiculous fake religion. COME ON!! As if making fun of Pastafarians for believing in God wasn’t bad enough you have to mock us by making up The Big White Male with a Beard? Yeah, I know that a fundie made this crap up, because no one is stupid enough to actually believe a Big White Guy with a Beard is our Almighty God. This is totally wrong and whoever started this is seriously going to pay unless you repent. Because if you don’t, you and all your believers are all going to lose out on the stripper factory and the beer volcano for eternity. So pick up the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and READ IT!!

1/24/2008 8:41:36 PM



A strong Christian who was never taught the meaning of PARODY.

1/24/2008 8:43:09 PM

cyborgtroy

You Christians think you have got it all figured out huh? So you THINK you know that there is no ADMIN so you make up this ridiculous fake religion. The Church of the ZOMBIE JESUS?? COME ON!! As if making fun of SIMULATIONISTs for believing in ADMIN wasn’t bad enough you have to mock us by making up A JEWISH ZOMBIE WHO DIED TO SAVE YOU FROM HIMSELF? Yeah, I know that an JUDAIST made this crap up, because no one is stupid enough to actually believe JESUS is our Almighty ADMIN. This is totally wrong and whoever started this is seriously going to pay unless you repent. Because if you don’t, you and all your believers are all going to BE BANNED for eternity. So pick up a BOOK, and READ IT!!

Sincerely,
A Strong Christian

1/24/2008 8:50:07 PM

Mister Spak

John:

You forgot to tell him he will BOIL in marinara SAUCE for ETERINTY!!!!

1/24/2008 8:50:40 PM

Syarzhuk

You, the infidel! There's nothing in the Bible that contradicts our belief in the Creator of Earth, the Flying Spaghetti Monster! He separated light and darkness, created the earth with fruit, animals and birds, and He created the Man (and later the Woman) with His Noodly Appendage! He led Moses through the desert, feeding Manna (a type of noodle) to the hungry Jews!

Those worshipping false idols portray Him as a bearded human - how dare they think the Creator looks even remotely like them! Throw away the false gods and accept Him as the only true God!

Ramen!

1/24/2008 8:57:45 PM

Jezebel's Evil Sister

I read the whole damn thing. That's why I'm no longer a christian.

1/24/2008 9:13:41 PM

Mudflappus

These dipshits just don't get it. It's always threats of hellfire and danmnation if you don't drop everything you're doing and agree with the bullshit dogma at their convenience.

1/24/2008 9:17:27 PM

ZugTheMegasaurus

I can just see him reading about FSM: "Heeeeey...I think this might not be real! How did no one else pick up on this??"

1/24/2008 9:17:53 PM

The_Hoser

And I just put my FSM emblem on the trunk of my car, next to my evolve fish.

1/24/2008 9:23:02 PM

Caustic Gnostic

Yay! Beer volcanos and strippers for eternity!

RAmen!!!!1!

1/24/2008 9:30:38 PM

James

Dear henderob,

Fuck you too.

Sincerely,

James

1/24/2008 9:36:21 PM

approximate

Oh, the irony of it all!

1/24/2008 9:46:53 PM

The Arrogant Atheist

I've read the bible, not impressed. Poor editting, and for the most part the writing's dry and boring; the LOLcats bible's easier to read for the most part. The characters aren't the interesting either. If a religion has a better written book, I'd probably greatly prefer it.

1/24/2008 9:47:49 PM

J-Hay

Waddadouche.

1/24/2008 10:29:59 PM

Alfred

"So pick up a Bible, and READ IT!!"

I have... that's one of the reasons I don't believe in the junk contained therein. If you actually read it, neither would you.



1/24/2008 10:37:06 PM
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