Quote# 35579

[This is AV1611VET's way to support correctness of the literal story of the flood]

Have you noticed, Vance, that all of these cultures that have supposedly been around for so long --- got the flood story wrong?

In everything I've read so far --- not one has mentioned Noah, Shem, Ham, and Japheth by name; given the dimensions of the Ark; the duration of the rainfall; the windows of Heaven; the animals going in two by two --- nothing.

This tells me that either the Flood didn't happen, or the stories were written after-the-fact to mock the true story --- and which explanation do you think I'm going to go with?

AV1611VET, Christian Forums 40 Comments [2/28/2008 2:05:17 AM]
Fundie Index: 5
Submitted By: Thammuz

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You're going to go with the wrong one.

2/28/2008 2:09:30 AM


I'm going with Occam's Razor.

2/28/2008 2:10:37 AM


You're making the mistake of assuming from the onset that the Genesis account is correct. Never mind that not ALL the animals were two by two. Those that were clean (i.e. not tamei) were seven by seven.

{sigh} Come on. Even if the Bible is just a Hebrew lorebook, it doesn't mean there's no worthwhile fruit in there, does it?

2/28/2008 2:15:10 AM

Mattural Selection

I'm going to guess that you are going to go for the incorrect one, but at least you recognise that people write stories long after the fact *cough*bible*cough*

2/28/2008 2:16:03 AM

Doctor Whom

2/28/2008 2:22:21 AM


Yeah, he evil cultures descended from Noah mocked his achievement, managed to see the future and created false archaelogic evidence. Makes perfect sense.

2/28/2008 2:32:26 AM

Since those cultures wrote this story BEFORE Noah's was put down in the Bible in the year 500 BC and since those details are not that important as you might think, your reasoning resembles the one of a six years old kid.

2/28/2008 2:49:22 AM

As if the dimensions of an object which may(or may not)have existed, the number of sons a guy had after the flood or the duration of an event that may or may not have happened were important.

2/28/2008 2:53:52 AM


Have we ever considered for a minute that the accuracy of the stories in the bible are not as important as the story itself?

We're talking about stories that were passed down, usually verbally as morality tales (and a way to explain fossils in mountains). Maybe there was a flood in the area, maybe not. Why does it matter?

And the other stories don't mention Noah, because Noah is not part of their culture.

I am really starting to feel sorry for this guy. I believe there is something wrong with him, and the fundies feed on the weak.

2/28/2008 3:04:37 AM


The doublethink is strong in this one.

2/28/2008 3:07:55 AM


Obviously not the one you're going for...

2/28/2008 3:18:25 AM


50-50 odds and AV comes up wrong.

Anybody surprised?

2/28/2008 3:20:39 AM


"and which explanation do you think I'm going to go with?"

Let me guess... the one which requires the least amount of thought.

2/28/2008 3:27:51 AM


"and which explanation do you think I'm going to go with? "

What ever one strokes your ego and ensures you THINK you're right.

That sin would be pride, by the way.

2/28/2008 3:29:57 AM


2/28/2008 3:33:05 AM


UM, the stupidlier one?

2/28/2008 5:44:28 AM


Care to purchase a vowel? They're really not as expensive as you think.

2/28/2008 6:07:01 AM


How about those other cultures came up with their flood stories first and those ancient goat-herders stole them and then built upon them.

Boy: "Why is this sea shell up here on the mountain, Grandfather?"

Grandfather: (remembering once hearing a traveler tell about a big flood in another land) "There must have been a huge flood, one so big the sea reached all the way up here."

Boy: (agog, looking down the mountain and trying to imagine that much water) "Wow! Why didn't everybody drown? The animals, too?"

Grandfather: (quickly coming up with the most plausible reply) "Well, this one family had this big boat and they took two of every animal with them."

Boy: "But Grandfather, nobody has a boat that big!"

Grandfather: "Well, they did...God told them ahead of time to build a really big boat because he was sending a flood."

Boy: (puzzled) "Why?"

Grandfather: "To punish the wicked, of course! Like little boys who ask their grandfathers too many questions!"

Later, at the encampment, the boy tells some of the other children and one of the bigger boys, thinking to have some fun with the little ones, says "Oh, yeah...I know about that. That was my great-great-grandfather Noah's boat..."

2/28/2008 6:10:46 AM


So damn close...

2/28/2008 6:45:55 AM


I think it's pretty clear what the correct explanation is...but since AV1611VET has himself accepted that he's disarmed and disoriented outside the Bible, I'm afraid I know what insanity he'll be accepting as the truth

2/28/2008 6:56:15 AM

Reverend Davidius

What's that? they all tell of different regional floods?

2/28/2008 7:07:36 AM


At least he is consistent...

2/28/2008 9:29:12 AM

Mister Spak

You'll go with the false one of course.

2/28/2008 11:34:28 AM


you forgot option 3: the global flood was a local myth and thus other cultures had no way of knowing that God smited them all and arrogantly kept on living.

2/28/2008 11:53:21 AM


That was very close.

2/28/2008 2:26:22 PM

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