I know people who were missionaries in Uganda and said that the demonic forces there were so strong, witchdoctors would fly thorugh the air... My missionary friends were at the place of a witchdoctor one time and he, trying to prove his power, laid on a table and began to float and levitate...The wife walked over to him, put her hands on him and said 'In the Name of Jesus,' and the man hit the table with a thud!
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Oh, my best friend did that too. Then he started flying around the room and shooting balls of pure heat from his hands. We had to call him down by shouting, "By the FSM!" and he dropped to the ground, and asked for pizza.
What? If he doesn't provide evidence, why should I?
Oh come on if demons provide all these fancy powers, why don't God offer some of these powers once in a while to counter-act these advances by Satan?
Satan currently sells RC cars and God is still selling the same old wood blocks with wheels? That isn't good business strategy.
It astounds me the amazing things these people see, and never have the presence of mind to record it...I mean cell phones, digital cameras...so many ways they can record video, yet they never do...
So strange.
"witchdoctors would fly thorugh the air"
Bartender, more peyote please.
Lie some more looney tunes, I could use the entertainment.
Apparently missionary work to far off undeveloped countries has one huge advantage. They can lie their asses off about defeating evil forces when they come back.
You can tell this is Fundie by how easy it is, invoke the name of Jesus just once and the evil forces are eliminated. Catholics at least try to make it a difficult long ordeal but fundies, nope, saying Jesus once, that's all it takes.
These "my friends testimonials" are exactly the same as "our hoojoo is better than yours"
"The wife walked over to him, put her hands on him and said 'In the Name of Jesus,' and the man hit the table with a thud!"
In the name of the same Jesus who walked on water?
"float and levitate", eh...?
Ever hear of a certain David Blaine, darcuntm?
ah yes, Uganda and the flying witchdoctors flocking in the spring air, I remember it like it was yesterday.
Screaming "by the power of Grayskull" and throwing yourself off the cliff at the river and gliding down for a swim, those were the days.
setting rows of popsicle stick crosses so the flying witches would plummet into the crocodile infested swamps, oh what fun we had.
Idi Amin with his Fat Albert impersonation, the joy.
oh wait...
Pics or it didn't happen.
Actually, I want a video.
Actually, show me in person. Videos and pics are too easy to fake.
Even better, show James Randi. You'll get rich! (Unless you're lying, of course. But that's a given, right?)
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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