Home Archives Random Quotes Latest Comments Top 100 Submit Quote Search Log In
Preview Build of the new site!

Quote# 400

hey, i just thought i would tell you that using an [magic] 8 ball is sorcery...it opens up the door for satan to attack you. just letting you know. i would ask forgiveness and get rid of it i were you.

Jehovah is Love, POD Warrior Forum 25 Comments [8/1/2002 12:00:00 AM]
Fundie Index: 39
WTF?! || meh


If using a die suspended in a chemical liquid is sorcery, then yes, it is.

If using an 8-ball of coke is sorcery, well, it would be rather magickal.

6/29/2006 9:24:43 AM


But the magic 8 ball says 'NO'...

... and the voices say 'Kill Jehovah is Love'.

6/29/2006 9:26:08 AM


What the hell? There's nothing magic about the ball.

12/27/2006 8:48:16 PM


He's right. I used a magic 8 ball and Satan attacked me. Or maybe it was my cat, I'm not sure. No, it must have been Satan. Come to think of it, one of my earrings went missing the day I used the 8 ball. And a year after I bought it, I got a flat tire.

You're right!

12/27/2006 9:51:55 PM

David D.G.

(*sigh*) Another fundie who has absolutely no concept of the distinction between fantasy and reality.

~David D.G.

12/27/2006 9:58:46 PM




12/27/2006 10:42:15 PM


Look... just buy a \"Magic\" 8-ball and crack it open. It's obvious how the damn thing works; it's an 8-sided die with text on each face, suspended in fluid of slightly higher density than the die. There isn't any pixie dust in there.

12/28/2006 3:50:27 AM

Cannot answer now: Reply hazy.

1/3/2007 12:43:02 AM


My reply is no.

1/24/2008 6:33:00 AM


Jesus Hates Pseudorandom Numbers

2/20/2008 7:05:57 PM


I... Huh? Wait... what? There... are... no... words.

8/31/2009 10:26:19 PM


And PCs and Internet are even more satanic. Get of them and run for your life!

8/31/2009 10:30:01 PM


Magic 8 ball says: Try again later.

9/1/2009 3:11:59 AM


Is Jehova love?

Magic 8 Ball says: "Better not tell you now."

9/1/2009 3:32:01 AM

Caustic Gnostic

Spirit levels are possessed by spirits then, right?

9/1/2009 7:20:19 AM

Dr. Shrinker

Naw, its okay, my ouija board told me so.

9/1/2009 9:22:19 AM



Asks the question: "will this douchebag ever grow a brain and get a life and stop picking on other people ruining all their fun and spice in life?"

Answer: Not likely. Hes a fundy rightwing delusional nitwit who believes in talking snakes, rib women, zombie deities, and magical underpants. Try again? Best 3 out of 5...

3/1/2010 10:37:30 PM


For Christ sake, it's as much divination as flipping a goddamn coin!

3/1/2010 11:00:36 PM


This coming from someone using an electronic device and screen to share information with someone on the other side of the globe?

Jehovah is Love is a witch! Burn her! Burn her!

3/2/2010 12:30:14 AM


Hey, I just thought that I would tell you that believing in the Bible is sorcery... it opens up the door for God (who is infinitely more evil than Satan) to rot your brain, lower your IQ and destroy your critical faculties & ability to think for yourself. Just letting you know. I'd do the intelligent thing and get rid of it, if I were you.

3/2/2010 10:21:55 AM


Blood. Flesh. Praying.

3/3/2010 6:26:19 AM

The Duelist

Indeed it is, brothers! Beg forgiveness from almighty GAWD and you'll walk again! Oops!
I mean, be saved from the debbill!

8/7/2010 9:34:41 AM


a magic 8 ball? really? wow... just..wow
what's next? a video game console?

11/12/2010 10:21:24 PM


replie to: Okamishojo

Actually, I think they've already been there, them and the panic-at-the-drop-of-a-hat media outlets.

9/19/2011 8:44:40 AM


Epic fail! It's a freaking plastic toy! What's next...are you going to preach against "cootie-catchers" just because another name for them is "fortune-tellers"?! Gimme a break!

4/22/2012 12:34:03 PM