I've been thinking about asking my local Humane Society to start a Rapture Pet Rescue list for people whose pets would be trapped in their homes after the rapture. They have a quarterly newsletter, and my thought was just a small box saying something simple like:
Rapture Pet Rescue
We will make every effort to
My questions to you guys are (1) do you think they would take me seriously, and (2) could they legally remove trapped pets from raptured people's homes, maybe through County Animal Services?
56 comments
Aw, I think this one deserves a break - I'm not condoning credulous lunacy or anything, but at least s/he is thinking about another life form in a caring manner. Next step, to do the same for those capable of expressing an opposing opinion in human language, instead of one who poops in your shoes whenever you bring up the possibility of St. Scotty beaming you up.
Well,now that would sound like a nice business for fundie customers!
"could they legally remove trapped pets from raptured people's homes"
I hate to say this but: it's the frakking rapture! If the rapture *actually* happened, the tribulation would begin... and demons and hellfire and whatever would engulf the earth. So, (1) I don't think many people are gonna give a frak about trapped pets, and (2) laws probably won't apply anymore.
Please learn your own stupid beliefs, and stop wasting time planning for the "post-rapture". It's not gonna come, and even if it did, we'd be too busy raping and pilaging to save your stupid pets.
(1) do you think they would take me seriously
he..hehe..hehee..haaah..BWAHAHAAAH!
Actually, I really shouldn't laugh singe the sad truth is that SOMEBODY is BOUND to take this seriously. And what a dreadful thought that is.
The level of stupid in this one not only stopped my train of thought, but ripped up the frigging track and blew up the bridge too...
I have to assume that newborn will encourage the local humane society to sin, in order that he has someone to pet-sit once he's gone.. :/
*Twirls mustache, laughs maniacally, and rubs hands together*
Note to self--- Set up phony company to lure in fundies worried about post-rapture animal care.
Damned, this is such a good idea,
I love that she's more concerned about pets than the billions of people who will suffer, die, and be condemned to Hell after the supposed Rapture. Now, that there is Christian love.
Oh, please do!
Then someone at the USHS can call the local authorities on your fundie ass!
"Yes, Officer. She had about 7 or 8 kids with her, kept ranting about what was going to happen to their Golden Retriever when the Rapture comes. I honestly believe those children are in danger."
Sadly, after the FLDS Texas FUBAR, religious fanaticism will be the last criteria for removing children from an abusive household.
Atheists On Guard - Trust Us
Sign me up. You'll have to pay me now, on a scale based on the estimated number of years your pet is expected to live.
Otherwise, (1) No; (2) Who is going to stop them?
(1) Hopefully not.
(2) You really are thick. No, you can't. After the rapture, with billions of people gone and the world in turmoil, everything in your town will go on as usual and the police's first and foremost objective will be to prevent kidnapping of pets.
Suuure.
Ofcourse, they will take you seriously! In fact, that kind of service already exists:JesusPets
Full of win!
damnit, why is it always the fundies that come up with brilliant sca... uhh.. business opportunities?
I guess their brains work on a completely seperate levels from the sane humans among us
Forgetting for a moment the fact that no merciful god would do any of the things associated with the Rapture...
...just what kind of "merciful" god would leave the poor animals behind??? Do my cats have to be saved too?? Well, I guess my gay cats are doubly fucked...gay, and unsaved.
Lunatics...
I'll start up that service for you!
Simply send a nominal fee (Say, £500/$1000- after all, you won't need it soon!) along with a copy of your house key to my office, along with a note giving your address, a list of any valuables you might have, and when you're going to be out of the house.
"I've been thinking"
That's open to debate.
I was going to call poe, because I can't imagine a rapture fan genuinely caring about anyone but themselves. Then I recalled that, what they miss in human relations, they sometimes make up for in relationships to pets. So now I'm on the fence.
But if your pets get left behind, doesn't that make them evil and thus deserve to die?
Oh well, it's a good moneymaking scheme, to say the least.
I will concede that it's a kind thought, but you are still an idiot. And no, I highly doubt that they would take you seriously. There might be a fundie or two who would, but on the whole they'd take you for a complete lunatic.
I want to charge $200 up front for the promise I will take care of your pet after you are raptured. That's $200 per pet, you know, for food and stuff. Non-refundable, btw.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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