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Quote# 44045

We have a shofar in our home. We had just finished watching a DVD about the Book of Revelation and I had gone on to bed while my husband stayed up for a little while longer. I was just about to fall asleep and I hear a trumpet sound. My heart skipped a beat or two and then I realized it was my husband practicing on the shofar in preparation for the Feast of Trumpets. I can't wait to hear the real trumpet sound.

I have found myself looking towards the sky a lot lately. For no reason I'll pull back the shades and and just look up at the sky. I haven't had any hightened senses in the physical realm, but my spirit has been hightened big time.

LOL at the posts about wearing clean underwear and such. I shared with my Bible study group last night that I need new dentures, but I'm not sure I want to spend the $2000+ for something that's going to be left behind. We all feel that the rapture is very soon and agreed that as long as I wasn't having major problems with my present choppers then there really wasn't an urgency to get new ones. I think I'll use the $2000 to pay off a couple of bills before I get out of here.

I'm so glad I can come here and share stuff like this.

Ready4theRapture, RaptureReady 36 Comments [8/2/2008 6:43:18 PM]
Fundie Index: 1
Submitted By: FundieFinder
WTF?! || meh
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chaosmage

I'm going to say what I think every time I read a quote from these guys: These guys are fucking crazy.


8/2/2008 6:46:22 PM

lumax

I don't know whether to have pity for these morons cause they are so delusional or just lol.

8/2/2008 6:47:59 PM

muters

I've always thought of believers in the Rapture being described as a 'death cult' to be a little over the top... but they really DO want their lives to end as soon as possible, don't they. Scary.

8/2/2008 6:50:36 PM

aaa

More stuff to me.

8/2/2008 6:53:38 PM

t3h_fuhr3r

I'm starting to feel really bad for these people...

8/2/2008 6:55:14 PM

I usurped god.

I really need to get a trumpet so I can sit outside these people's houses and randomly blow into it just to get them all worked up.

8/2/2008 7:02:55 PM

LordJiro

Sure your husband wasn't just being a dick? I know that's what I'd do if, by some freakish coincidence, I wound up living with one of you death cultists.

*middle of the night* *trumpet noise*
*Wife/roommate/whatever:* TAKE ME JEEEZUS!

8/2/2008 7:16:28 PM

Old Viking

Remind me to tell you the joke about blowing the shofar.

8/2/2008 7:17:03 PM

Brian-sama

Why bother to pay off your bills more quickly if you're just going to jet out of here? Your debt won't matter when you're in heaven, right?

8/2/2008 7:30:42 PM

approximate

You could always send me the $2000. I'll make sure it goes to a worthy cause. Really.

8/2/2008 7:42:28 PM



what will you need the money for when you go? your choice: you can have money that will be left behind, or dentures that will be left behind but will help you chew in the mean time. next time think it through...

8/2/2008 7:47:49 PM

KatAutumn

My one wish is that on September 29th, when all of these assholes decide to go outside and blow their fucking horns hoping to get God's attention that one of two things happen:

1. Their neighbors call the cops and they are arrested. When they tell the fuzz they were simply trying to get God's attention I hope they are locked away in the loony house.

2. God parts the clouds, looks down on them in disdain (totally Monty Python & the Holy Grail style) and tells them to shut the fuck up because he's trying to sleep.

8/2/2008 7:51:18 PM

Moondog

I hope you live in a trailer in the middle of nowhere. If you lived in a three-decker and he started makeing a racket like that in the middle of the night, the neighbor's would call the cops.

8/2/2008 7:53:00 PM

Lucilius

Maybe Wynton Marsalis is the Messiah. I could deal with that.

8/2/2008 7:54:59 PM

WhyDontYou.Org.UK

Sad deluded fundiefool

8/2/2008 8:09:31 PM

BeemerRefugee1990

Damn, I wish I'd known about this when I got my mother to get me out of trumpet in the 4th grade. I'd have never quit, and I'd still have one.

And I live in high-density fundie neighborhood, they're on the doorstep every fucking Caturday. I swear, if I hear that doorbell when the Rockies are one down with men on in the 9th one more time ...

8/2/2008 9:00:09 PM

David B.

"I need new dentures, but I'm not sure I want to spend the $2000+ for something that's going to be left behind."

Why not? Won't the $2000 get left behind the same whether it's in dentures or dollar bills?

"I think I'll use the $2000 to pay off a couple of bills before I get out of here."

Yeah, you wouldn't want a couple of debt collectors turning up at the door to your heavenly mansion and repossessing your crown or anything.

8/2/2008 9:17:36 PM

anevilmeme

I'd love to sneek into these people's yard some night, I could have such fun with my son's trumpet, a flashlight and a sixpack.

8/2/2008 9:30:42 PM

Fanatic-Templar

I was just about to fall asleep and I hear a trumpet sound. My heart skipped a beat or two and then I realized it was my husband practicing on the shofar in preparation for the Feast of Trumpets. I can't wait to hear the real trumpet sound.

I know how it feels. I recently purchased Final Fantasy Tactics, but unfortunately the CD was damaged and at some point in the storyline, it would simply not load any further. I tried that battle again and again, hoping 'this time it'll work!' even though I knew that it really wouldn't.

Sigh. It's going to be months before I can get another disc.

but I'm not sure I want to spend the $2000+ for something that's going to be left behind.

Yes, better keep the 2 000$, those aren't going to be left behind.

8/2/2008 10:12:37 PM

solomongrundy

I'd love to send this guy

http://www.trumpetofthelord.com/

round to Ready4theRapture's house in the wee small hours every other morning. He's got a special pre-WW.I 1911 C.G. Conn Circus Bore Cornet!

If that don't make them think the craptures on the way I don't know what will!

8/2/2008 10:31:59 PM

Wise Child

I've heard of stories of everyone, but one sleeping person, clearing out of a dormitory at a Bible College and someone else blows a trumpet outside an open window. As a prank.


8/2/2008 10:37:43 PM

Generic Human Fleshbot

If you are going to be gone after such a short period, then why not just spend all your money on stuff you want? I mean, you wont need it after you're "gone" right?

8/2/2008 10:44:16 PM

Allegory for Jesus

Drink the Kool Aid...come on...just drink it!

8/2/2008 11:14:11 PM

dworkin

So nice. Remember to turn the lights and water off before you go too.

8/3/2008 12:01:10 AM

protowhalepig

we had curry last night, so my wife also heard trumpeting noises from the bedroom....

8/3/2008 12:14:43 AM
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