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How about I beat you with a rod? Or even better, a halberd.
8/30/2008 2:00:55 AM
J. Random Lurker
Beatings for Jebus?
8/30/2008 2:02:49 AM
yes the bible says stone em
please be a troll
8/30/2008 2:06:00 AM
Poe, and an obvious one at that.
8/30/2008 2:18:14 AM
"just beat them. With a rod, like it tells me to in the bible."
Stone them instead, like your Babble also recommends, preferably before the age of accountability. There ya go, problem solved. You get the satisfaction of "raising your kid right" and the kid gets a free ticket into heaven. Works out beautifully for everyone, wouldn't you agree?
8/30/2008 2:21:55 AM
But if God knew they wouldn't believe since the beginning of time, isn't He just being an ass by bringing someone into the world to be beaten, not believe in Him, and then go to Hell?
It seems like a load of douchebaggery.
8/30/2008 2:25:48 AM
Allegory for Jesus
I wish that I could commit crimes and just be an outright jackass, and say "this book told me to do it!" as an acceptable excuse. That would make me truly happy.
8/30/2008 2:30:11 AM
Michael Jackson agrees.
"Beat it! Just beat it! All you gotta do is beat it!"
8/30/2008 2:31:11 AM
i swear, if i keep reading such idiocy im going to die horribly
8/30/2008 2:48:38 AM
Where in your bible, exactly?
8/30/2008 2:54:37 AM
@werewolf: He's referring to the old "spare the rod, spoil the child" line. Proverbs 13:24 specifically but the sentiment is also found at Proverbs 22:15, 23:13, 23:14 and 29:15 if you're interested.
8/30/2008 3:04:53 AM
See, that's why the honor thy mother and father is in there. So that you can still scare the kids when they're old enough to hit back.
8/30/2008 3:20:45 AM
Um...that's not what the person asked.
Basically this is "Are non-christian children going to hell?"
Answer: "BEAT THEM BEAT THEM BEAT THEM!!!!11!!1"
8/30/2008 3:31:04 AM
Soooo.....lemme get this straight. Its not ok to kill a 150 cell blastocyst in a woman's womb, even if she is raped, but it IS ok to beat or stone your child if they dont believe your bullshit?
Nice set of morals ya got there champ.
8/30/2008 3:50:48 AM
Obviously this is someone trying to demonstrate just how ridiculous Christianity is.
8/30/2008 4:26:27 AM
Bob should be turned into soylent green
8/30/2008 4:36:45 AM
8/30/2008 4:49:30 AM
I am calling poe. And hope to hell it is otherwise this is a sick fuck
8/30/2008 4:49:32 AM
Hugh G. Rektion
I'll beat you with my rod.
8/30/2008 4:49:51 AM
...you poison all your children,
to camouflage your scars.
-Marilyn Manson: Man that you fear
8/30/2008 4:58:13 AM
Yes, beating kids really motivates them to go to church.
8/30/2008 5:14:03 AM
Our Grandmother on her death-bed, handed us the family bible and said "This is very important. Always keep this close to hand. You never know when you are going to run out of toilet paper".
See then looked at the priest and whispered "Za-een ba takhad" (go fuck yourself) then passed on with a smile on her face.
8/30/2008 5:35:30 AM
If this isn't a Poe, then I fear this guy's kids.
8/30/2008 5:40:35 AM
How 'bout I beat you with my rod?
And make you gag on it too....
Unless you're Poe. Then, well...still wanna? :3
Always good to find new and interesting ways to curse people out. *remembers that phrase for later*
8/30/2008 5:57:38 AM
8/30/2008 6:39:50 AM
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