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Quote# 47094

At the age of thirteen I was thrown into another world by a fateful accident. Clinically pronounced dead, I returned from the afterlife with knowledge rarely glimpsed by the average person. This experience has defined my life as a person with each foot in a different world. Explaining the afterlife to those who have not had a near death experience requires breaking down the illusions that most people hold of what they call "reality". I hope that my experiences can enlighten others while allowing me to share my insights with my fellow humans.

I have received the seal of the beast in afterlife world 20-22 years ago. Main information - the first who meets us in afterlife world is the BEAST which is described in Bible, but not God as many think!
BEAST - this creature has size about 12 meters in height. This creature is able to stay on two legs and has very long tail (so it also 30 meters long including the tail).
IMAGE OF BEAST is any creature who has seal of beast with spirit of beast inside and without man's status!
MARK OF BEAST. After sealing up appears imprint! This imprint has name - mark. It looks like black tattoo which is putted on spirit (not on body) therefore can not be cutted out. It contains the head of dog with iron slam on head.
SEAL OF BEAST. The beast has the seal. It is like iron seal on a long pole. Any host is able to mark by seal of beast.
666 is number of men who will be marked by beast but will be saved!!! (i.e. common number of saved from all who will be marked by beast).
FOREHEAD whole forehead bone from brows up to top of head! The seal of beast is fatal when it putted on forehead or on any hand.
NAME OF THE BEAST. The beast has name, same as any creature who was created by Creator.
NUMBER OF NAME OF THE BEAST is number of people who will call themselves by name of the beast. I.e. 666 is number of people who will be saved from the lake of fire with seal of beast on any place. But the number of name of the beast is number of people who will call themselves same as the beast.
HOST is creature (man or angel) who received the seal of beast!!! Host can to mark up anybody by the seal of beast!
ROD OF IRON is spirit of beast which is inserted into us horizontally.

nickols_k, Forerunner Discussion Board 61 Comments [9/10/2008 10:56:20 AM]
Fundie Index: 4
Submitted By: Damned at Random
WTF?! || meh
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#678715
C_V


deluded for jeebus?

9/10/2008 11:13:57 AM
#678722
Nowonmai

The proof of the effects of oxygen deprivation on the brain.

9/10/2008 11:19:48 AM
#678724
Vincent

What the FUCK are you babbling about?!

9/10/2008 11:20:43 AM
#678728
David B.

"At the age of thirteen I was thrown into another world by a fateful accident."

Apparently one brought about by eating the wrong kind of mushrooms.

9/10/2008 11:25:00 AM
#678734
Phedippedes

Too bad that the original post was removed from the Forerunner Discussion Board. It would be interesting to see how the other fundies react to these rants.

9/10/2008 11:30:43 AM
#678738
Brain_In_A_Jar

I have received the seal of the beast in afterlife world 20-22 years ago.

Wait, wait, wait - you've allegedly seen evidence that your end-of-the-world-battle-apocalypse-prophesy is true, and you joined up with the guy who is supposed to lose?

9/10/2008 11:35:28 AM
#678743
maevemab

LSD anyone?

9/10/2008 11:37:25 AM
#678748
Waiting for God

Stopped reading after "It looks like black tattoo which is putted on spirit".

I'd like to nominate this person for worst use of grammar in public ever. If we haven't created such an award then my question is why the hell not?.

We definitely need one.

Oh, and nickols_k, as a general rule, if it only appears in your head, it's not counted as evidence. I once believed a bridge was trying to eat my crotch and totally freaked out, I was on acid at the time.

9/10/2008 11:42:11 AM
#678751
Mortok

Well that makes perfect sense.

9/10/2008 11:45:16 AM
#678754
Nevermore

Great concept for an RPG!

A man thrown into another world and returns, and as he slowly regains his memories of that place he gains new abilities. For example "IMAGE OF BEAST" could give you a psychology bonus (cause fear/terror, +1 charisma attribute, etc.) and "FOREHEAD" could give you a charge bonus.

This guy is a genious.

EDIT: Oh wait... Planescape Torment beat me to it... (sort of)

9/10/2008 11:47:08 AM
#678757
Crabby

The number you're referring to in these delusions is actually 616.

Stop with the Payote man!

9/10/2008 11:50:26 AM
#678781
aaa

No more acid to you.

9/10/2008 12:10:20 PM
#678787
Lulzmonger

Someone has been playing Black Isles/Troikas games, I see.

9/10/2008 12:12:21 PM
#678789
Joules

Isn't this a repeat?


9/10/2008 12:13:36 PM
#678791
Ozymandias

At the age of thirteen I was thrown into another world by a fateful accident. Clinically pronounced dead, I returned from the afterlife with knowledge rarely glimpsed by the average person.

...and I used my new knowledge to fight crime, with an skeptical partner I may be in love with.



Sorry, should I pitch it to Fox now?

9/10/2008 12:13:41 PM
#678792


It's plagiarism. And not a good and original one, BTW.

9/10/2008 12:14:08 PM
#678805
Bill O'Rly

Last line = beast rape?

9/10/2008 12:22:02 PM
#678808
Quantum Mechanic

Make up stuff much?

9/10/2008 12:24:56 PM
#678832
Dan Onymous

When they clinically pronounce you alive again, I might start paying attention.

Until then I'll assume the doctors have seen nothing to indicate that you aren't still brain-dead.

9/10/2008 12:50:59 PM
#678838
Kissy-chan

Proof that Yellow Sunshine is bad for you.

9/10/2008 1:01:21 PM
#678841
Dark_Lord_Prime

"MARK OF BEAST. After sealing up appears imprint! This imprint has name - mark. It looks like black tattoo which is putted on spirit (not on body) therefore can not be cutted out. It contains the head of dog with iron slam on head."

The mark of the beast is an image of Wile E. Coyote and another failed ACME Anvil trap?

9/10/2008 1:02:32 PM
#678845
kingoftheheavies

LoneWolf? Is that you? Hello?

9/10/2008 1:05:11 PM
#678847
JohnTheAtheist

Um, you are nuts.

9/10/2008 1:05:58 PM
#678853
Poppy Pomfrey

I'm very sorry for your medical condition. May I suggest St. Mungo's hospital for your stay! a very good hospital, great staff and long time experience!

9/10/2008 1:10:05 PM
#678869
L

Wow. This sounds like Engrish.

Also, I think we all know where that "rod of iron" was "inserted horizontally." ;D

9/10/2008 1:18:34 PM
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