1 2
#688207
anonymous_troy
Jesus Hamsandwich?
9/17/2008 1:40:57 PM
#688296
kingoftheheavies
Cover yourself in the blood of jebus? WTF!?
You retards get more bizarre each and every day.
9/17/2008 2:31:43 PM
#688314
Drop and Roll
You must tear down all images in your house because they are evil manifestations of satan's children! Burn the place where they lay with petrol and drink the blood of jesus. Rejoice at your freedom from the deamons and their evil, alleuyah.
9/17/2008 2:41:53 PM
#688316
Princess Rot
"Is it possible for demons to manifest themselves in pictures and paneling on walls?"
Well, yes. But you need to reserve a Holy Candle for when it happens and keeping Eileen's curse level down helps.
Kudos to whoever gets what I'm referencing.
9/17/2008 2:42:55 PM
#688323
aaa
How many electroshock treatments you had?
9/17/2008 2:47:23 PM
#688351
Mister Spak
Can demons manifest as a wide screen TV showing first run movies?
9/17/2008 2:57:09 PM
#688355
HeadAche
Please, see a shrink!
9/17/2008 2:58:29 PM
#688406
Phil
what happens if you don't have the blood of jesus to hand?
9/17/2008 3:23:09 PM
#688419
Murdock
@ Princess Rot
Could it be, a fellow Silent Hill fan? I was just thinking about that game the other day.
9/17/2008 3:34:07 PM
#688422
Rallymodeller
@ Phil: You can use ketchup.
9/17/2008 3:35:00 PM
#688484
Scotty
"...Yeshua Hamashiach..."
So that's what the H stands for in Jesus H. Christ. I'd always wondered.
9/17/2008 4:17:02 PM
#688486
ErdeKaiser
Fundie: "Yeshua Hamashiach"
Me: "Gesundheit."
9/17/2008 4:18:39 PM
#688491
Goldarn
I'm pretty sure demons live in my closet. And under my bed.
And sometimes my shoes pinch my feet, so I'm sure that demon lives in my shoes. Not the back part, where the heel is, but the near the toe.
I put one of those gel inserts in, but I figured that's what the demon wanted, so now I just endure, like Thor would want me to.
9/17/2008 4:22:55 PM
#688501
Carbonated Margarine
"Just test to see what it is."
But, as with depilatory or tile cleaner, be sure to test just a small area first and wait 24 hours. That should give you time to think of less batshit-crazy (or, for the PC, guano-special) things to do.
9/17/2008 4:32:53 PM
#688537
Mike
So... pour wine on your head, say some Hebrew and all will be ok?
But-casses.
9/17/2008 5:09:00 PM
#688570
El Guapo
And if you speak the elvish word "Mellon" meaning friends, the gates of Moria will open.
Why does the fundie rating seem to be closely tied to the "How D&D is this bullshit" rating?
9/17/2008 5:30:24 PM
#688575
CailinBan
@Scotty and ErdeKaiser - big lols!
9/17/2008 5:36:22 PM
#688577
Quantum Mechanic
You are one sick fuck.
9/17/2008 5:38:53 PM
#688598
terrylong
The best protection against demons is to not believe in them.
9/17/2008 5:51:14 PM
#688672
Lucilius
I think demons manifested themselves in the lead paint chips student snacked on throughout childhood.
9/17/2008 6:43:26 PM
#688692
Jeff Weskamp
"What happens if you don't have the blood of Jesus to hand?" -- Phil
I've heard about this aspect of Pentecostal "Spiritual Warfare" before. Basically, you imagine yourself being covered in the blood of Jesus. It's supposed to protect you from demonic and supernatural influences. Oh, and "Spiritual Warfare" is the Pentecostal term for what's called "Defense Against The Dark Arts" at Hogwarts.
"Yeshua Hamashiach" simply means "Jesus the Messiah" in Hebrew. Apparently, saying "Jesus the Messiah" in English doesn't have the same level of power. Cornelius Aggripa, the 15th Century German wannabe wizard, said the Hebrew had the most magical power of any human language. He said it was based on triconsonantal roots, and therefore had links to the Trinity.
9/17/2008 7:03:32 PM
#688790
D Laurier
Ok, so where do I get a bottle of this "blood of Jesus"?
9/17/2008 8:01:41 PM
#688815
Poppy Pomfrey
Yeshua Hamashiach - sounds like Parsel tounge to me
9/17/2008 8:35:54 PM
#688819
GigaGuess
...And that was when I realized I was looking into a mirror.
9/17/2008 8:37:31 PM
#688883
Princess Rot
Murdock: "Could it be, a fellow Silent Hill fan? I was just thinking about that game the other day."
Yes, I am and I'm hoping my PC can run 5 when it comes out this fall because I can't afford a PS3/Xbox. *crosses fingers*
9/17/2008 9:04:06 PM
1 2