Quote# 47831

There is no doubt whatsoever in my mind that the earth is flat. Like so many other Christians in the western world, I believed for many years that science had got it right - that the earth was a sphere, circulating the sun. But then, by the grace of God, I got the courage to start researching this issue for myself. I studied scripture, prayed over scripture, and THEN (and ONLY) then did I return to science with the scriptural teachings in mind.

The Bible is absolutely crystal clear that, contrary to the teaching of the evolutionists, the earth is flat.

Garvan, the Garvanian 46 Comments [9/17/2008 1:23:41 PM]
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He claims to have advanced degrees from reputable christian universities in the US. Just like Kent Hovind.

9/17/2008 1:28:47 PM


That explains why gravity is weaker in Antarctica, the guys at the South Pole are falling off the edge, and the Earth is slowly crumbling in to form a sphere.


@ Prager:
I had some trouble understanding what you were talking about.
"reputable christian universities"

This part didn't make any sense when I read it.

9/17/2008 1:32:21 PM


Thanks. Always good to hear Christians admit that.

9/17/2008 1:33:49 PM


If the world is flat, please prove it by running over the edge as soon as possible. Don't worry, we'll use bungee cords or something similar to hoist you back up. I'll also bring my camera so we can record this historic event.

9/17/2008 1:43:31 PM

i call Poe

9/17/2008 1:43:39 PM

Obvious poe is obvious

9/17/2008 1:44:27 PM


The Bible doesn't say the earth is flat.

And before anyone brings up "four corners of the earth", I'm surprised you people haven't heard that EXPRESSION before.

Anyway, I think Garvan is opposing the "round earth" simply because it's science that's determined the earth is round and he has made the mistake of completely separating Scripture and science and putting them on opposite sides of the fence in his mind.

9/17/2008 1:44:47 PM


so, for a while, you liked logic, then comitted purpuseful brain damage, and now think you know the truth. Well, tell me oh wise one, what proof do you have of this nonsencical blathering?

9/17/2008 1:56:08 PM


There's an underlying reason why you chose to brainwash yourself, Garvan. Would you care to share that with us? The reason, Garvan, the reason.

9/17/2008 2:03:49 PM



9/17/2008 2:05:10 PM


I studied Donkey Kong and Mario. THEN and ONLY then did I go back to science and discover the world is a series of isolated, side-scrolling bubbles connected by ladders and teleportational pipes with Nintendo in mind.

9/17/2008 2:10:20 PM


What I would like you to consider, dear reader, is the SCIENTIFIC case for a flat earth. Basically, you can see the evidence for this yourself by following the simple experiment below.

The Experiment

You will need:

One football
One sharp kitchen knife
One bucket of water (about 6 pints should be sufficient)
One jug
One bright lamp, with a 100 watt bulb in it.
One mirror
One pair of sunglasses
One roll of cellotape

1. Take the football in one hand, and the knife in the other. Stab the knife into the ball to burst it.
2. Now cut a hole in the ball around the size of a tuppence. Put the small piece of plastic or leather to one side.
3. Now pour the water from the jug into the ball until it is around 70% full. As water enters the ball, the air will move out.
4. Now place the patch of ball you removed back over the hole. Bite off a piece of sellotape and stick it firmly back in place.
5. Now set up your mirror, and put on the sunglasses.
6. Now turn on the lamp and point it upwards, being careful not to blind yourself.
7. Now hold the football up in the air in front of the mirror, making sure that it catches the light.
8. Gently shake the football back and forth, and then let it settle. Then OBSERVE.
9. Then place the football under a cold tap and turn it on. OBSERVE what happens.

The Observation

You should have observed the water in the football splashing back and forth as you shook it.
When placed under the tap, the water should have fallen on the top of the football before splashing off.

The Implications

The scientific establishment would have us believe that the earth is like a ball, circulating round the sun, and turning on its axis. 70% of the earth's surface is made up of water, which is why you were told to fill the football to this level. The lamp represents the sun, and the mirror the moon. I am sure we would all agree that the football is thus a pretty good reflection of what the scientific establishment would like us to believe the world is like.

But what did you observe when you shook the football? The water splashed around, but return to the bottom of the football, leaving the top 30% of the football transparent and free of all water.
Now compare this observation with the globe that science would have us believes exists. These scientists tell us that trillions upon trillions of gallons of water just magically stick to the planet's surface! Did you see that happen in your experiment? No!

Similarly, science tells us that some of the wettest parts of the world are in the tropical forests of Indonesia and the great rain forests of Brazil. But if you imagined the location of where these would be on your football - how much rain would have gotten to them if the water from your tap represented the rain clouds in the sky? Not a lot.

If the earth were indeed spherical, the oceans of the northern 'hemisphere' would simply gush down the sides of the earth, leaving the bottom half of the planet completely barren and dry.


The earth cannot be spherical in shape.

9/17/2008 2:37:08 PM


Kid, have you ever circumnavigated the earth?

9/17/2008 2:37:31 PM

Mister Spak

So earth did not evolve from being flat to being round?

9/17/2008 3:00:35 PM


Does someone have to remind you to breathe every day?

If so, can you tell them to stop?

9/17/2008 3:35:54 PM


It's a Poe right?

9/17/2008 5:52:04 PM


Colonel Kenny Hogwash award.

9/17/2008 6:16:40 PM


Phedippedes: are you a poe?

certainly a douchebag....

9/17/2008 6:30:53 PM


So this loser "prayed" i.e talked himself into believing something stupid & expects others to follow? Screw that. If the Earth is flat I happily invite him to jump off the edge. :)

9/17/2008 6:44:28 PM


We need to talk.
Then I will drop you from the Tower of Pisa.

9/17/2008 6:49:44 PM


circulating the sun


ADD: @protowhalepig:

That post is word-for-word from this guy's blog.

9/17/2008 7:04:17 PM



Phedippedes was quoting the experiment from the original site. I think he meant it as an example of the asshatery present on the site. Personally, I think all flat earthers are Poes. I can't believe anyone could be that stupid in the 21st century.

9/17/2008 7:48:30 PM


Those two are not related... FAIL.

9/17/2008 8:48:36 PM


Ark wrote:

"The Bible doesn't say the earth is flat."


9/17/2008 8:55:12 PM

Old Viking

Uh, Garvan, the Bible's assertions that the world if flat is not a genuine News Flash.

9/17/2008 9:43:20 PM

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