Home Archives Random Quotes Latest Comments Top 100 Submit Quote Search Log In
Preview Build of the new site!

Quote# 48292

I can say that the Devil witnessed and gave testimony to the reality of the Lord coming to visit me. The Lord came in His clearness and we talked for hours. The conversation started at 9 am during my morning bible study with prayer , the Bible and the concordance. When the conversation was over it was ten pm and yet I didn't know we had talked that long... it was so mind blowing. While I sat there in the livingroom lazyboy contenplating all that we had discussed .. My unsaved hubby came home from work.

The living room was dark because when I started the bible study it was light and now here it was night and the room was now dark. I didn't get out of the chair. My hubby walks from the back door through the kitchen to the livingroom. He gets to the doorway and stops. The devil lets out a scream and starts cursing. The reason I know it was the devil is because while my hubby may have been doing the spouting there is no way that he knew what had occured in this room.

visionary, Christian Forums 14 Comments [9/30/2008 10:32:25 PM]
Fundie Index: 11
Submitted By: Hadron
WTF?! || meh


Dude, no more acid to you.

11/1/2008 12:05:59 AM


Drugs are bad, m'kay?

11/1/2008 12:28:49 AM


Or mayhaps your hubby stumped his toe on something heavy in the dark room.

11/1/2008 7:05:29 AM

Jack Bauer

Strange there is no summary of what-god-said.

11/1/2008 8:19:55 AM


That's what happens when you use DURACELL to power your brain cell - you can bullshit 6 times longer!

11/1/2008 9:19:11 AM


Listen,if I could just talk to your husband privately for a second........Is she gone?.......good.......RUN,MOTHERFUCKER,GET THE FUCK OUT,BEFORE SHE DECIDES THE DEVIL HAS TOLD HER TO KILL YOUR ASS WHILE YOU SLEEP!!!!SHE'S BATSHIT CRAZY,SAVE YOURSELF!!!!

11/1/2008 9:24:48 AM


Maybe the guy was pissed that he got home to find you'd been sitting on your fat ass all day and there was no housework done and no meal prepare, while he'd been working hard all day.

11/1/2008 9:32:28 AM

a mind far far away

Psychos For Jebus! Let's all join and lose our minds too! The Lard wasn't there for a chat, sweetie, he was wanting something else. It HAS been 2000 years, you know. That's why you felt like it was 'mind blowing'. You were blowing something alright. Who knew god could last that long?

Edit: THAT'S what your husband was mad about. He's been working all day to come home to find his wife doing something else. I'd be pissed too.

11/1/2008 11:01:32 AM


Calling the devil for a witness? That's a fucking stupid idea even by fundie standards.

11/1/2008 11:17:48 AM

Or maybe she scared the shit out of him when he thought nobody was in the dark room.

Typical fundie logic.

11/1/2008 3:10:26 PM


Alrighty, psychosis alert. That's seriously beyond regular fundamentalism, that's deserving of its own entry in the DSM-IV

11/1/2008 4:15:49 PM

Crimson Lizard

You married the devil?!

4/3/2013 9:45:38 AM


You weren't having a conversation with the Lord and losing track of time; you fell asleep in your La-Z-Boy recliner. You gave your husband a scare when he found you sitting silently in the dark in the living room.

4/3/2013 12:14:23 PM

Quantum Mechanic

Smoking the good shit again.

2/13/2015 6:37:14 PM