[regarding the rapture...]
also...we know that the dead in Christ will most certainly precede us. will we ourselves actually witness this happening immediatly before we take the "last train home"?
58 comments
[citation needed]
And by suddenly burst open you mean were found open and empty after people stole the bodies to sell for medical research?
And are we also talking kidnappings here?
Grave robbing and kidnapping for Jebus?
Aren't you people supposed to be judged and delivered to heaven or hell when you die ?
And if the "saved" ones get perfect new bodies in heaven, why the bloody hell would any buried bodies suddenly burst forth from the ground? And what about the ones who've been cremated? And let's not forget about the ones who died due to loss of body mass (i.e. shark attacks, innocent people blown to pieces as collateral damage, amputees, etc.)...
Oh! And what about the fact that the bible says only 144,000 men(?) get to go?
Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling!
... okay, if Jesus blows up a bunch of dead bodies and makes my local cemetery look like a war zone, THEN I'll convert.
Also... that "last train home" line? Remind anybody else of this Simpsons moment...
Bart: Why are we all dressed up? Are we going to Black Angus?
Newspaper clippings, television coverage, radio reports, eyewitness accounts, police reports? Come on, there must be something.
iflurry, that makes me wonder if the Rapture isn't just an elaborate advertising ploy.
"The end is nigh...the end of high prices!!!"
I just love how they think we will try to explain away the targeted disappearance of hundreds of millions of Christians and children (and dead bodies apparently) with stuff like aliens or lasers.
If the Rapture ever happens, I will be the first to admit that God exists. I am pretty sure it won't though. I give it the same odds as being granted superpowers after a radiation blast.
what about the MILLIONS of graves that have suddenly burst open?
Smoking weed usually wields this effect...
Either that, or your God is a graverobber.
the whole RR site is mutual masturbation. After reading a thread my brain feels polluted by so much superstition that I need a dose of reality to clean it out.
It's amazing how much time these people spend speculating on something that they CAN'T know when due and waste their lives.
Well, if there is a fundie director out there willing to make a movie about the rapture then here's a perfect title for it: "The Last Train Home"
That name alone is worthy of a blockbuster offering.
The whole zombie slant does kind of make the rapture sound cool--kind of. With graves 'bursting open' it sounds like Dawn of the Dead.
Fundie zombies would all be going crazy for our brains, because they certainly didn't have any when they were alive. Nyuk-nyuk-nyuk.
Where the fuck does the Bible mention this?
One of the later gospels, I forget which, asserts that hundreds of dead saints rose from their graves and lurched on into town at the time of the resurrection. The earlier ones (and all other historical accounts) evidently didn't consider this noteworthy.
sethola's post illustrates one possible way this curious turn of events might have come about - the author briefly went even more insane than usual and just up and decided that it happened.
"actually never, EVER have graves exploded showing no evidence of a body."
I believe you are forgetting zombie uprisings. There have been several to date.
@ Dark_Lord_Prime
"Oh! And what about the fact that the bible says only 144,000 men(?) get to go?"
And if you ain't teh gay, you ain't gonna like heaven.
So we'll have a bunch of bloodthirsty, braindead christians wandering around?
This is different from normal how?
Um, all I can think of is the crooked cemetary where my father was supposedly buried, but...oh, I don't want to think about it. I really don't. All I will say, then, is if "MILLIONS of graves have suddenly burst open," I do believe I'd have heard about that before now.
Oh, and I don't think little Caylee Anthony in Orlando was raptured away, either.
@ Jugband: These people are impressionable--wanna try and make them believe it?
Well, dang! If graves have to be exploded in order for the "dead in Christ" to go to heaven, then I guess buildings, vehicles ... anything at all in which a True Believer is inside of ... would be ripped full of holes, too. I guess that makes all those "In the event of the Rapture, can I have your car? " bumperstickers obsolete.
people go disappearing all the time (of course never on such a mass scale, however...)
Yeah, ten people all at once... :p
Osiris wrote:
"Where the fuck does the Bible mention this?" "For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever."
-- 1 Thessalonians 4:16-17
actually never, EVER have graves exploded showing no evidence of a body.
If the person is missing, they bury and empty box.
Your move.
I would so love to see this made into a movie.
When I think of these people at 95 years old still waiting for the "rapture" I feel sorry for them, but I shouldn't, I guess, as they will think up some excuse why it hasn't happened yet.
If hate of a particular view point gives credence to that particular view point, then the atheists have the fundies beat by 1,000,000 to 1.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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