@john
"Don't mess with the Lord. He's nearsighted and He's pissed!"
That reminds me of a joke my uncle told me a few years ago:
One day, a nun and a monk went golfing. At the first hole, the monk teed off and just missed the hole. In frustration, he said, "Damn! Just missed!"
The nun, horrified, said, "That is terrible! You shouldn't say something like that!" The monk responded, "Of course, you're right, I apologize."
At the next hole, the monk missed again by an inch or two and said, "Damn! Just missed!"
Shocked, the nun said, "That's awful! You must stop saying that, I beg of you! If you don't stop saying that, God will strike you down with lightning!" The monk replied, "Yes, I'm sorry, I won't say it again."
At the next hole, the monk missed again, and cried out, "Damn! Just missed!"
Before the nun could respond, black clouds started rolling in the sky above. They sky churned and sparked and lightning came down and struck...
...the nun.
All of a sudden, a booming voice called down, "DAMN! JUST MISSED!"