Home Archives Random Quotes Latest Comments Top 100 Submit Quote Search Log In

Quote# 52558

Please do NOT let your children near anything written by JK Rowling ever again. Her books are purely demonic, and have been associated with murder, suicide and 'mental illness' in certain parts of the USA. My friend Fred knows of one case in Missouri where a child who read the 'Chamber of Secrets' turned into a 'schitzophrenic' overnight and had to be sent to an institution.

I know you do not believe in demons, but PLEASE JUST TRUST ME ON THIS and destroy those wretched books before they destroy you and your family.

Garvan, The Garvanian 96 Comments [11/20/2008 10:09:49 PM]
Fundie Index: 7
WTF?! || meh
Username:
Comment:



1 2 3 4
Bored One-time Poster

That's NOTHING compared with what the Bible can do to you.

I know this one guy, Garvan...

11/20/2008 10:12:49 PM

Mike

Wut?

11/20/2008 10:13:13 PM

Brain_In_A_Jar

Her books are purely demonic, and have been associated with murder, suicide and 'mental illness' in certain parts of the USA.

Think carefully, Bible basher. Is this really the card you want to play?

11/20/2008 10:14:56 PM

Mister Spak

Being a member of your death cult is more likely to cause schizophrenia than a JK Rowling book.

11/20/2008 10:16:25 PM

a mind far far away

This made my head spin. I think he's confused about some things. Garvan needs to look up the definition to "mental illness", "schitzophrenic", and "belief in demons".

11/20/2008 10:21:32 PM

Paschal Wagner

And no, In The Mouth Of Madness isn't a documentary either.

11/20/2008 10:23:17 PM

captain hooker

a friend of mine went to college with this guy who took acid and thought he was an orange

he locked himself in his room for 4 hours

then they all heard a scream, so they broke down the door only to find him sitting on the corner of the bed with the bedpost buried about 8 inches up his asshole

he was thirsty and trying to juice himself


true story

11/20/2008 10:23:24 PM



My friend Fred knows of one case in Missouri where a child who read the 'Chamber of Secrets' turned into a 'schitzophrenic'[sic] overnight and had to be sent to an institution.


11/20/2008 10:29:49 PM



the fuck is a "schitzophrenic"?

11/20/2008 10:30:53 PM

Siberia

Imagine when she sees the HP fanfiction...

11/20/2008 10:33:49 PM

Ozzie

No problem, my teenage daughter and I have moved on to Stephanie Meyers and the "Twilight" vampire series. I also recommend her adult book "The Host".


Have you taken a look at your own wretched book. That's a scary book.


11/20/2008 10:34:33 PM

The L

So, the Dragonriders of Pern books are still OK, right?

11/20/2008 10:38:10 PM

tracer

"My friend Fred knows of one case in Missouri where a child who read the 'Chamber of Secrets' turned into a 'schitzophrenic' overnight and had to be sent to an institution."


A woman in Wisconsin failed to forward this letter on to 10 people she knew, and she was killed in a car crash the very next day.

11/20/2008 10:40:40 PM

Martha Jones

I live in Missouri.

I would have heard about that.

FAIL ON AN EPIC SCALE

11/20/2008 10:44:02 PM



Why does anything to do with psychological disorders have to go in "inverted commas"?

11/20/2008 10:44:34 PM



This is the same Fred who tried to turn in the local Methodist preacher for buying wine for communion in the store because "Christians all use non-alcoholic grape juice for communion"(apparently ignorant of the fact that about 75% of Christians drink real wine for communion)! I wouldn't believe that fool if he said the sky was blue. And I wouldn't trust your racist ignorant ass if you told me the Pope was Catholic.PS Harry Potter is great for teaching kids that magic DOESN'T exist you dolt. If they try the spells, they find out they are FAKE and DON'T WORK, which makes them smarter than the average idiotic fundie like you and Fred!

11/20/2008 10:44:35 PM

Amanda

I'm guessing "certain parts of the USA" is your house?

11/20/2008 10:45:35 PM

aaa

This quote is made out of solid irony.

11/20/2008 10:56:05 PM

Old Viking

My uncle thinks he's a chicken. My aunt's first reaction to this was to seek treatment for him. But then she realized that she could use the free eggs.

11/20/2008 10:56:28 PM

Efrain

@Siberia: You win!

11/20/2008 10:57:11 PM

Canadiest

Fred told me your so full of shit you've been offered a fertilizing contract

11/20/2008 10:59:28 PM

Elphada

Exactly! Amen![RR speak] Please read the True Blood books for some fun. *snicker*

that wouldn't be Fred Phelps would it?

11/20/2008 11:04:04 PM

Giveitaday

Please do NOT let your children near anything written by JK Rowling ever again

As if anyone in their right mind would heed your advice.

Her books are purely demonic

Demons of what? Mass production? High sales? Entertainment???

and have been associated with murder, suicide and 'mental illness' in certain parts of the USA.

Fear mongering bullshit and lying for jesus.

My friend Fred knows of one case in Missouri where a child who read the 'Chamber of Secrets' turned into a 'schitzophrenic' overnight and had to be sent to an institution.

No he doesn't. I doubt that you even have a friend named fred. Unless you can provide so form of proof (And you can't) this just more lying for jesus, burn sinner.

I know you do not believe in demons,

At least you got one thing right.

but PLEASE JUST TRUST ME ON THIS

I make it a habit not to trust liars.

destroy those wretched books

I know this chick in Alaska that you would get along with.

before they destroy you and your family.

Books don't destroy families, actions do.

11/20/2008 11:12:12 PM

Reverend Jeremiah

LOL, the Bible is WAY worse than those books.

11/20/2008 11:16:07 PM

jaconey


Let's have fun and roll this post back in time to 1977 shall we!

Please do NOT let your children near anything written by Gary Gygax ever again. His books are purely demonic, and have been associated with murder, suicide and 'mental illness' in certain parts of the USA. My friend Fred knows of one case in Missouri where a child who read the "Dungeon and Dragons Players handbook"turned into a 'schitzophrenic' overnight and had to be sent to an institution.

11/20/2008 11:19:56 PM
1 2 3 4