We were created for one purpose - to worship the Lord. "Salvation" is the gift of being in His presence for eternity doing what we were created to do.
70 comments
At first, God created the whole universe; such as the planets, galaxies, stars, and the like. But his ego felt unsatisfied. So he created humankind to satisfy this ego, and would torment any person who didn't satisfy said ego for all eternally.
Then why do we have all this extra stuff for sex, locomotion, and computering?
God must be a terrible engineer.
Pride is a Sin, a deadly sin in fact.
If God would create an entire universe just to feed his own ego then he has commited the sin of pride and is imperfect. If he is imperfect then he is not god.
The amusing thing about this concept is the fact that all humans like praise. "Good job," or "you know a lot about this," or "you sure look nice tonight" are pleasant to hear. But how much of it could the average human take? Five minutes of being praised would be annoying. An hour would be maddening. Yet God wants an eternity of hearing, "Oh, boy, you sure are great; you're the cat's pajamas; yes,sir they don't come any greater than you." An eternity!
@ Shadoboy (#827595) If God wanted that, he should have made robots.
According to fundies, he did ... beepbeep ...
In terms of gifts that ranks well below the Mr Spock tie I was once given (apparently someone thought he was an atheist icon).
@Carm lurker
I've never ever seen Hank, can you kiss his ass for me?
I absolutely would not want a bunch of creatures bowing down to me and telling me how wonderful I am. Congratulations to me. I'm officially better than your god.
@solomongrundy, re: Spock as atheist icon: That is fucking hilarious. Thanks for the laugh, boyfriend!
We were created for one purpose - to worship the Lord.
I guess the uncounted millions of the Host of Heaven, who chant unceasing praise at the foot of Jehovah's throne just weren't satisfying His need for praise.
Wow, an eternity of kissing Hanks ass.
I'm assuming that Satan will at least mix up the torture a bit.
Why would God create people without any purpose other than to make him feel more important? My CD teacher thinks the same thing, that we were created explicitly for relationships with god.
Also, lets make sure I have this straight. God creates us so we can worship him, and his reward for doing what he asks is a supposed eternal bliss . . . thing, but if you don't do the thing you were (questionably) asked to do, he tortures you for all eternity with fire and brimstone?
What the fuck?
I just went to the pound and got a cat. Then again, it's backfired, since he expects me to worship him.
Seriously, even when I was a Christian, I had a problem with the idea that God had created everything just to glorify Himself. In addition to the problem of why a perfect Being would need to be glorified at all, couldn't a Holy Trinity just spend eternity falling in love with Himselves/Themself?
LOLWUT
#827995
2008-Nov-23 08:43 AM
I would rather be assimilated by the Borg.
You owe me a new monitor to replace the one I just spat home made chili all over. (Chili for breakfast....mmmmm yeah...)
@Captain Obvious
"Pride is a Sin, a deadly sin in fact.
If God would create an entire universe just to feed his own ego then he has commited the sin of pride and is imperfect. If he is imperfect then he is not god."
He's also supposed to be Jealous, so add Envy to the list.
Oh, and although he's supposed to be "slow to anger", that does mean he gets angry, which is Wrath.
That's a definite 3/7.
@ Captain Obvious and #828217:
And let's face it, since creating the universe he really hasn't accomplished anything except sitting around on his duff all day expecting to be praised, so we can add sloth to the list. 4/7
Bad Diety! Bad!
The Lord was created for one purpose - so we could worship the Lord. "Limits and False Morality, Bigotry, Wars, and self-inflicted ignorance" are the gifts of being under the heel of our creation for eternity.
Ok, and, funny enough, he has failed, omnipotent as he is, to success with 2/3 or more of his creation.
Okay, that is just stupid. Creating the universe just so you can be praised is like having kids just so you can get Father's Days cards. If you're only doing it for your own ego, do the kids a favour and don't have any. Seriously.
I think Monty Python said it best:
Let us praise God. Oh Lord...
Oh Lord...
Oooh you are so big...
Oooh you are so big...
So absolutely huge.
So absolutely huge.
Gosh, we're all really impressed down here I can tell you.
Gosh, we're all really impressed down here I can tell you.
Forgive us, oh Lord, for this our dreadful toadying.
And barefaced flattery.
But you are so strong and, well, just so super.
Fantastic.
Amen.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register . Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.