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Quote# 53024

There is a messiah coming...you just dont know when...it could be at anytime. In the bible it clearly states that there will be a rapture,where there will be natural diasters, and a lot of other things. And when you die you will face the lord jesus christ and he will ask why he should let you into heaven,and if you have no personal relationship with him he will deny you in front of the Gate Of Heaven and he will hurl you into the lake of fire.

alex, songfacts 46 Comments [11/29/2008 7:27:27 PM]
Fundie Index: 3
Submitted By: seraphicreverie
WTF?! || meh
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Yup, any day now.

11/29/2008 7:30:24 PM



Yes, the eternally benevolent Jesus Christ is going to hurl me into the pits of hell.

11/29/2008 7:32:18 PM

a mind far far away

WE don't know when, but I bet you think you know when the AC is coming, right alex? The rapture is not "clearly" in the bible, as it's not there at all. Natural disasters and wars are prophecied, who could have seen those coming? I prophecy that today it will be overcast with a chance of rain. Guess what? I'm right, I must be a damned prophet. The koran says that when we die and face Jesus, that he will ask us if we worshipped him as god, and if we say yes, he'll throw us into Jahannam. So who's right, you or Islam? Please cite sources, and give answers other than 'because the babble says so'.

11/29/2008 7:39:23 PM

Psittacosis

it clearly states that there will be a rapture

No, it doesn't. Y'know, after you've been stood up for 1900 and more years, you'd think some people would take the hint.

11/29/2008 7:39:57 PM

szaleniec

The Rapture is an invention of 19th-century heretics and doesn't appear in the Bible.

11/29/2008 7:42:03 PM

Ozzie

The Jesus you are describing in your post is kinda of a dick don't you think. This is exactly the reason why I stopped believing.

I thought the Lake of Fire was Satan's domain. Are they all working together - God, Jesus and Satan against us.
The whole premise is retarded and I want no part of it.

11/29/2008 7:48:24 PM

Sasha

In the bible it clearly states that there will be a rapture

Where?? Chapter and verse, please. I'm dying to read it.

11/29/2008 7:55:08 PM

aaa

And fuck you too.

11/29/2008 8:04:42 PM

Devonian

"There is a messiah coming...you just dont know when...it could be at anytime"
Actually we know when. It was supposed to happen in the lifetime of Jesus' contemporaries (as he himself said several times). Needless to say, it didn't happen (how people continue to believe in him after that blatant mistake is beyond me).

11/29/2008 8:10:33 PM

Old Viking

Sounds serious.

11/29/2008 8:13:36 PM

Captain Obvious

So Jesus and his sky daddy are going to send me to eternal torment for not being his friend?

And you still don't see why we always question this so called "eternal love"?

11/29/2008 8:34:53 PM

Jezebel's Evil Sister

Nope, a messiah is a "deliverer," i.e., a hero. What you're describing there is a sadistic monster.

11/29/2008 8:36:23 PM

Palifox

Goody. Can hardly wait.

11/29/2008 8:38:19 PM

Headache

The end of planet Earth, barring any unforeseen extinction level events, will happen when the sun runs out of fuel it can fuse and the sun starts to expand into a red giant. Not really a problem I would worry about...

11/29/2008 8:47:40 PM

Osiris

Didn't the Messiah already come? Isn't that the whole point to Christianity? Is this supposed to be a Jewish fundie then?

11/29/2008 9:05:38 PM

Ken

Oh, yes, I really want to have a relationship with this God/Jesus! I want to stand there in Heaven singing joyful songs as he hurls people born into the wrong circumstances into a pit of burning and pain! Then we will dance with joy that there are no more scumbags like atheists, gays, Jews and feminists and we will live in la la happy candyland forever!

11/29/2008 9:32:15 PM

John

The Bible doesn't state "clearly" anything about the Rapture. If it did, there wouldn't be so many arguments over pre-trib, post-trib, mid-trib, pre-millennialism, post-millennialism, amillennialism, pre-wrath, etc. and people setting dates and having them pass - the Jehovah's Witnesses alone must be over a dozen at this point.

11/29/2008 9:37:37 PM

Jay-Sus

there will be a rapture

Chapter and verse.

11/29/2008 9:41:18 PM

Alex

A lake of fire -- oh noes!

11/29/2008 9:47:32 PM

Adude

Wow, Jesus has an arm on him, huh?

11/29/2008 10:19:32 PM

Elia

Well you'll never make any friends with THAT attitude whippersnapper!

11/29/2008 10:29:09 PM

colonel catastrophe

Hmm nice guy... So I should believe in him because, if I don't, he'll hurt me? You know, the Mafia and organized crime have similar tactics...

11/29/2008 10:35:13 PM

Quantum Mechanic

I'm so scared.

11/29/2008 10:56:48 PM

Caboose 206

It's interesting, because Many of Jesus' comments can be interpreted as meaning that the second coming would occur within the lifetime of the audience he was talking to. Also, throughout history many religious leaders have announced it imminent, within 20 years of their comments. this stretches back all the way to the Middle Ages.

We're still here.

11/29/2008 11:27:40 PM

Hadron

Jebus sounds like a bit of a maniacal creep to me, but I'm not worried at all because he's either dead or didn't exist. How any "normal" adult can believe bible nonsense like that is a mystery to me.

11/30/2008 1:17:50 AM
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