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Quote# 54430

Are you a Decoy?

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I posted this before at Rapture News under my previous onscreen name of Morgan. But thought I would post it again for any new member who may not have read it before. I wrote it one day about 2 years ago and still reflect back on it often. It is an insight that has helped me a great deal and pray it will help others.

Are You a Decoy?

Some days it seems as though I should never have left the warmth of my bed. Everything seems to go wrong - from

1. dropping my freshly filled favorite coffee cup on my keyboard first thing in the morning -
2. to my computer taking four times as long to process every command as usual
3. and a client calling every five minutes to see if I have that report done yet -
4. To the phone ringing and hearing from every friend whom hasn't called me in 6 months and chose this moment to pick up the phone and want to 'catch up'
5. to every telemarketer in the world calling in between
6. to having everyone I have faxed a report to that day tell me they never received it

At some point - I realize I am under attack. These are not coincidences. And the choice is made - to give in and give up and have that temper tantrum I so justly deserve and therefore be ready to tear off the head of the next person I talk to -

or realize that I am on the front lines taking the hits from the enemy and since he is not omnipresent - if he is messing with me - then that means there is a brother or sister in the Lord who is having a good day and recuperating from a day they need to be able to witness to someone for the Lord.

So, I wave the white flag and accept my assignment as decoy and smile. For, while the enemy was thinking I would destroy my witness and lose my joy - he was wasting his time and another soul was saved somewhere down the street by someone who was not under attack.

I am a decoy in the army of God - reporting for duty!

Ruth, Rapture Forums 65 Comments [12/17/2008 4:59:49 PM]
Fundie Index: 3
WTF?! || meh
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CaseAgainstFaith

you have a big ego and paranoid much?

12/17/2008 5:01:17 PM

Mrs. Antichrist

Yay for being canon fodder, I guess...

12/17/2008 5:03:37 PM

Mark

Hmmm...so that's why my fax never went through yesterday.
The Devil was holding it back!!!

12/17/2008 5:04:42 PM

Headache

I am a decoy in the army of God - reporting for duty!

Looks more like Murphy's Penal Battalion

12/17/2008 5:05:25 PM

Blue J

I'm pretty sure that Satan has enough minions to give everyone a bad day simultaneously if he so desires. And, since your problems involve spilled coffee and telemarketers, not, like, you know, possessed scissors trying to kill you or your desk chair trying to crush you to death, I'd say it's a rather safe bet any demon "attacking" you is fairly low on the demonic chain of command.

12/17/2008 5:06:08 PM

Brain_In_A_Jar

Anything to avoid facing up to the drab wretchedness of your non-life, huh?

12/17/2008 5:06:16 PM

JewBoy

You call that a bad day? The "enemy" must be sleeping on the job.

I wish all my bad days are as "bad" as the one you describe.

12/17/2008 5:06:29 PM

Mister Spak

It's because you are a dumb fundie who doesn't know how to operate electronic equipment.

12/17/2008 5:15:18 PM

MichaelL

Oh, you're so persecuted... call the Wahhhhmbulance...

Freaktard

12/17/2008 5:17:22 PM

Lucilius

Amazing. Even those Raptards with some inkling that their lives are wasted on fantasies can auto-rationalize their suckiness.

12/17/2008 5:17:27 PM

CailinBan

Poor telemarketers. Not only have they got one of the crappiest jobs on the planet, but it turns out they're really only agents of Satan.

12/17/2008 5:17:45 PM

enna

Delusions aren't healthy. Seek professional help.

12/17/2008 5:19:23 PM

Ronni Bom

1: A simple rule, don't keep beverages in the same level or above as your computer or your hardware.
2: Of course, you might have purred coffee into the damned thing
3: Maybe you should finish it then
4: Non work-related calls on the job, no wonder that report isn't finish
5: Hang up
6: That is because you are doing it wrong, else call a Technician.

12/17/2008 5:25:38 PM

JR

Fax machine? Where do you work -- 1988?

12/17/2008 5:25:41 PM

myheadhurts

soooo Satan cannot be everywhere at once and while he is causing massive pain and hardship for others, you get by with a few stuck faxes...

12/17/2008 5:33:45 PM

Dark_Lord_Prime

Human shields for Jeebus!

12/17/2008 5:34:20 PM

Papabear

You're an idiot in the race of humans - reported as doodoo.

12/17/2008 5:39:55 PM

FundieFinder

why are some of you rating this a 5?

12/17/2008 5:40:39 PM

Brenz

Whatever gets you through the day, lady.

12/17/2008 5:40:39 PM



1. You're clumsy
2. Your computer has viruses and spyware
3. You're spending all your time on Rapture Forums when you should be working
4. Your friends are worried about you because you've become so involved with your doomsday cult that you haven't called them in 6 months
5. You have no life and you're home on the computer all day when the telemarketers are calling
6. Again you were so wrapped up in Rapture Forums that you didn't get your work done.

Sound about right?

12/17/2008 5:43:13 PM

Pule Thamex

Hi Ruth.

Oh my! I say! This is rich material indeed. As you say, very helpful; my flagging spirits rose as soon as I read it.

I am now on the reflecting part.

And I wonder, do you work in a department similar to 'The Ministry Of Silly Walks' (see Monty Python's Flying Circus), only it's called 'The Department of Silly Reports'?

I say this, because I'm just trying to conceive of the type of person who wants a report that they know is going to consist of mangled grammar, convoluted meanings and the meandering thought processes of a driveling pin-head.

Strange indeed. But highly amusing and uplifting nonetheless.

Love ya, Pule.

12/17/2008 5:48:06 PM

aaa

Oh great, more cannon fodder. Bring in the minigun.

12/17/2008 5:51:08 PM

Eden

Don´t forget the fact that it rained yesterday. That was a direct attack by Satan, aimed at you ;)

12/17/2008 6:06:24 PM

Jezebel's Evil Sister

I don't know which is more arrogant — being inspired by some drivel you yourself wrote or believing that you are the sole focus of the debbil's attention on those days when you are too lazy, fuzzy-minded, and disorganized to get your work done. Sheesh!

12/17/2008 6:21:47 PM

Illuminatalie

I am a decoy in the army of God - reporting for duty!
You are a microbe in the House of the Rising Bread.

12/17/2008 6:33:49 PM
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