Taking over Canada!!!!?
Praise Jesus Yall
75 comments
Try it, you redneck peice of monkey shit. I will personally find you and make you scream like a little bitch to your useless fucking god. We are peaceful people, until you try to fuck with us, dicksnot.
Hey, it could be kind of like that Canadian miniseries The Trojan Horse ...
Oh, and also, Poe-tastic.
Blame Canada!
*cough* poe *cough*
"The acquisition of Canada this year, as far as the neighbourhood of Quebec, will be a mere matter of marching, and will give us the experience for the attack on Halifax, the next and final expulsion of England from the American continent." - Thomas Jefferson, 1812
He failed then, you fail now. At least he wasn't a Poe.
Poe. But if not:
Sounds like a bad idea to me, their comedians are generally much funnier than American ones.
Besides, Benton Fraser would be able to stop you.
Is this a poe?
Invade Canada check
Bring democracy to Canada, Check
Praising Jesus in hill billy manner, check.
Poe.
Me, I think certain parts of the US would be better off in Canada, and leave the rest to Fundistan.
As to the above, well, obvious troll is obvious, but anyone who thinks Canada would be any kind of pushover is invited to look up the phrases "Vimy Ridge" and *Dieppe Raid".
It should be historically noted that it was British troops that burned down the White House. Canada was not formally an independent nation at the time and so claims that it "won" anything in 1812 are misrepresentative.
But if Canadians wish to take a point of pride in an historical event, thier ancestors did help turn the American invasion of the north into a disaster.
As for trying it now, it's simply not a feasible option. Canadian ships sail in US Task Forces. Canadian soldiers fight alongside American troops in Afghanistan. Canadian personnel can be found manning sensor systems that are tied into the US defense network.
Attacking Canada would be like the US declaring war on one of its own divisions. Or you attacking your own right arm.
FACT: Canada doesn't take shit from anybody.
Hell, Canada is the only country so far to successfully invade the States and burn down the White House. Canada's badass.
Yeah, go ahead and try it. We wouldn't go down without a fight, and we already kicked your ass once (war of 1812 ring a bell?).
Nothing against America (just American fundies), but I'm quite happy to be Canadian - and I'd fight to the death to stay that way.
I was reminded of the War of 1812 when reading this. Haven't you learned about Laura Secord? We did put up a fight - us and Britan. And we won.
Scary thing is, there are people out there who are dumb enough to be truthful about this and not just Poeing like this one.
Nobody has explained the concept of win-win to you, right?
Of course they would put up a fight! Wouldn't you if they attacked you? That is how WWII started, you know; Hitler walked into Poland and said "this is now part of Germany". It worked well for him in the end, didn't it? He angered the whole world and ended up half-mad and hidden in a bunker, and killed himself.
I like my Canadian neighbors just fine! Who could ask for a better more friendly neighbor?! Just like you knuckle-draggers to attack the nicest people in the neighborhood! WTF is wrong with you fundies?!
Canadian friends, we humbly apologize for our asshat fundie population who make such statements.
You never need to worry about them carrying out these kind of threats because they could never get off their sister-gramma-daughters long enough to bring such plans to fruitation.
@D Laurier
"We wont put up a fight?
Twice!
And again in 1812. I guess third time's the charm?
Y'know, I'm a laid back guy. I'm not really a man driven to violence. However, having said that, I will do my damnedest to remind you why we are a sovereign nation and have been for as long as we have. You tried this shit once, and it did not go well. Trust me, we WILL put up a fight. And you will not win. Why? The world loves Canada. Britain, France, Holland, three countries, each with a military you really do not want to fuck with (especially the Dutch. They use fighter jets to negotiate with hostage takers.) And all of them pretty good friends to Canada. You will not be fighting hockey players and mounties. You will be fighting the world. And you WILL lose.
A massive Poe approaches.
Assuming it's not a poe, here's points to consider:
The E79 Elcan optical sight mounted on various American weapons? Canadian built. Also Canadian used.
The artillery computers American gun crews use on some howitzers? Canadian built, Canadian designed, Canadian operated. Same goes for a pretty wide spectrum of combat optics and computers.
The C7 assault rifle family, used by the Canadian armed forces, manufactured by Diemaco under Colt license? Yeah. On par with American service rifles.
Canadian landmass? Larger than the United States. Second largest single nation landmass. The US has failed to invade a country with a smaller population and only a fraction of the landmass. Canadian terrain is just as difficult in places as Afghanistan.
The last time Canada and the United States officially went to war, the United States lost.
Good luck with that notion of "rolling over" Canada. We'll still happily trade peacefully with you, despite the unfortunate babblings of the fundamentalists you lot still somehow tolerate.
US invading Canada?
I think it is much more probable that the North America of the future looks more like this:
image
Everybody might guess which of these two new countries will fare better economically, have a better education system, score higher in human development and human rights indexes ...
from limited experiance with Canadians I have concluded they are mean drunks and not to be messed with. They also have moose and bears and other animals that might be a problem, it is also very cold , and americans are just not equipped for the cold and snow.
I think actually I would prefer to surrender to the Canadian mounties and become part of Canada where I would get decent medical care.
Didn't the Roman Empire end like this? Bullying talk, extravagance, probably more conquest than was good for them, all leading to the big kablooie? These people must think it's good to watch an entire civilization crumble, especially if you happen to be part of it.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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