[Eagerly expecting to see the heathens suffering from his cozy gig in heaven]
i thought there was gonna be some kinda big tv screen placed in public area. how are we gonna able to witness the tribulation? or are we not allow to view the deaths of ppl?
31 comments
I'm always confused by posts like these...if you really had Christlike attributes, you wouldn't be filled with vengeance and satisfaction as people are blasted into fire and brimstone, right? I mean, can you imagine Jesus pointing at a burning person and saying "PWNED"?
A guy dies and is welcomed into heaven. He trots in, joyfully and very relieved and takes a look around. Heaven is nearly empty! He turns back to St. Peter and asks, "I knew many people on Earth who I think are more deserving of heaven than I am. Many who had more faith, or lived purer lives. If I can make it into heaven, how is it possible that there are so few others?"
Cloud dies and goes to his final reward. After a while he's bored with the emptiness, the harp music, the 143,999 virgin male jewish strangers. Finally he asks Pete; "Hey, I thought heaven was gonna be a lot more fun."
No TV, Cloud - ya get one litle window, like on the ark.
Gee, most the people on Earth are gonna die a horrible death and you're worried about....front row seats. Do you really think heaven's for people that insist on suffering for entertainment or gratifictation?
Just how are your God and Satan different?
He says this like he got a memo on it a while back.
"After you've been brisked away into heaven and through the golden gates everyone is to meet in the main square. St Peter has a 60" Flat screen set up so we can all watch the rapture in High Def!"
Shh! Quiet, everybody, they're about to show the tribulation blooper reel! I wanna turn the volume up; where's the- ...Awwww, Saint Anthony, did you lose the remote again ?
According to what I read (in your very own bible, no less), in heaven there is no negativity whatsoever. Also, according to the bible, even after the crapture, there is still a chance to become a christian. Therefore, to view the deaths of potential christians would be a bad thing, and hence negative, and hence not doable in heaven.
Besides, according to the bible, all there is to do in heaven is sleeping in a mansion and worshiping god and bowing at his feet all day long. Nothing more. Oh yea, sounds like a great party, huh?
Cloud reminds me of a certain Pharisee. He stood in the temple and prayed, "thank you god, for making me different from other men." God did not look kindly upon this self righteous git. Remember that story Cloud? Didn't think so.
I find disgusting that so many fundies only want to get into Heaven so they can watch others suffer in Hell. That is self-righteousness and hipocrasy (sp?) with a side-serving of sadism. This people seem to miss the basic tenets of christianity so much.
What happeneed to love thy neighbour? Being merciful? do not wish evil unto others?
@ Masker ,
At the very least, if they can't love their neighbours, there's Thomas 42: Jesus said, "Be passersby."
'Hypocrisy', btw. A bitch of a word....
Thanks Caustic Gnostic!
"At the beggining, God saw how Men had fallen and gave them 10 commandments on how they should behave."
"Thousands of year latter, Jesus came to Men and saw that those comandments where too long, so he resumed into one: Love God beyond all things and thy neighbour as much as yourself"
"In the 21st century, it has been agreed that this is also too long for Men, so it has been further reduced to only four word:"
"Don't be an asshole"
What makes you think that you're going to be in a position to watch anyone else's Judgement other than your own?
Let me clue you in on a little secret--if you're planning to gloat over the deaths and damnation of millions of people...you won't be doing it from Heaven.
I really did used to think that’s what some people’s afterlife would be like.
I was sure that it was a trap. Anyone that wants it was going to Hell.
Probably won’t need NEARLY as many mansions in that place.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register . Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.
