[Q: When Jesus went to Japan, did he eat sushi?]
Jesus never went to Japan. He didn't have to. It was uninhabited during his time.
78 comments
From Wikipedia:
"The Japanese Paleolithic (?????, kyu-sekki-jidai?) covers a period starting from around 100,000 to 30,000 BC, when the earliest stone tool implements have been found"
I think that was a bit before Christ.
*voice of Clown *
"Oooh boy, you were tied to the tracks, and that stupid-train just kept rrrrRUNNIN' over ya, didn't it? Runnin' over you!"
And neither were the Americas, Africa, or the British Isles, right? You should really change your name. Soldier for Stupidity would fit you better.
this SfS guy has to be a troll or something, read his profile and some other posts, and my conclusion is: there's no way any human could be this stupid and delusinal. if he is serious, then i may just have to jump off a building...
Wait guys, SfS has been personally annointed by god as his earthly spokesman. So damn the archaelogical evidence, if he says Japan was uninhabited until the last 2000 years then that MUST be the case.
Jesus was only on Earth for about 30 years and during that time the people of Japan were wandering in the wilderness (without leaving any trace of this journey),before they reached the Promised Land ,after having parted the sea to get there .
Or was that some other group ?
Ah, an expert like Soldier for Salvation might finally be able to answer the question, "did those feet in ancient time walk upon England's mountains green and was the Holy Lamb of God on England's pleasant pastures seen?"
"Jesus never went to Japan. He didn't have to. It was uninhabited during his time."
image
GEOGRAPHY DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY!
@Dan Onymous
"And was Jerusalem builded here
Among those dark Satanic mills"
Here in Yorkshire. There's plenty of space to rebuild the Temple. Which means the fundies are screwed when Jesus reappears wearing a flat cap, pint of beer in hand & ferret in his trousers, saying 'Eee, bugger t'Rapture, I can't be arsed! You fundies can go bugger theeseln's. 'Appen I'll tek thee Atheists oop t' 'Eaven, ye'll 'ave a reet gradely time oop there.'
*fiddles about in trousers* 'Stop wrigglin' about y'bloody ferret!'
Jesus was actually chased out of Japan by people driving well designed, well-built, yet inexpensive iron chariots. The Japanese understood full-well the potential threat to their nation from the establishment of Christian fundamentalism and megachurches.
The entire episode was stricken from the New Testament by decree of the Roman emperor, Constantine, in an effort to save a bloated and inefficient Roman iron chariot industry which was looking for a government bailout to stave off bankruptcy.
I can believe that this is a legitimate post, because I have personally heard Fundies say things this stupid. There are no bounds to what their imaginations can cook up, because they need to justify their fantasies any way possible.
This is my favorite type of fundie quote: not bigotry, not irrational defenses of dogma, just blatantly, demonstrably false statements. Like the one a while back when David J. Stewart was claiming there were no Prohibition-era gangsters anywhere but Chicago.
"Jesus never went to Japan. He didn't have to. It was uninhabited during his time."
Japanese citys expanded greatly with the introduction of iron tools around 600 bce. This expansion led to greater powers being concentrated in the hands of urban nobles, who gave rise to the early samurai class around 100 bce.
the introduction of zen buddhism around 25 or 20 bce alowed the bushido code to be created around 25 ad.
By 80 ad, bushido had become the heart of the samurai class.
Alright then, why didn't he go visit the Mayans and Aztecs? They most definitely were* inhabiting Central America at the time. How about going down and visiting some of the Central and South Africans? They were there at the time too. And what about going way up into Europe?
*not that the Japanese weren't in Japan, of course
Had anyone in the first century C.E. gone to Japan, they probably wouldn't have eaten anything that we'd recognize as "sushi". Using fermented rice to preserve fish was a technique which was only adopted in Japan in the 8th century or so; nigirizushi, the "piece of fish on a small ball of vinegared rice" variety, was invented in the 19th century.
@Jack Bauer
The Four Yorkshiremen of the Apocalype are:
'Eee, me lumbago's givin' me jip!'
'You just spill me pint?! OUTSIDE!'
'I could murder some Fish & Chips!'
''Er down t'road's just pegged it'
And there's a Fifth Horseman. His name's Kevin - he just gets on people's tits.
I assure you, there is a perfectly stupid explanation for this. Remember how Christmas Trees were actually co-opted from some sort of Pagan ritual? Same basic concept.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shingo,_Aomori
Edit: Whoops, I was beat to the punch by a mile. Sorry.
"[Q: When Jesus went to Japan, did he eat sushi?] "
Silly question, could be satire.
"Jesus never went to Japan."
Ok, true.
"He didn't have to."
Uh oh, he's going to say something stupid.
"It was uninhabited during his time."
I knew it! The Fundie Stupid Train is never late!
And therefore so too was every place on the planet except for a little piece of the Middle East, by your "logic."
Jesus Christ in a Honda, these people are dumb.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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