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Quote# 60900

The Hebrew year 5770 begins September 19th 2009 on Rosh Hashanah. Computer matrices found using Bible Code software suggest that this could be the year when the Bride of Christ will be raptured and the Tribulation period begins.

The word "RAPTURE" has been said not to appear in the Bible. Is it possible that it has been concealed or hidden (ENCODED) within the scriptures themselves. Four matrices have been located in the Old Testament linking the key word "RAPTURE" with the Hebrew years of 5770 (2009-2010), 5771 (2010-2011), and 5775 (2014-2015).

Anonymous, Rapture Code 73 Comments [3/26/2009 9:42:41 PM]
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Dark_Lord_Prime

"Four matrices have been located in the Old Testament linking the key word "RAPTURE" with the Hebrew years of 5770 (2009-2010), 5771 (2010-2011), and 5775 (2014-2015)."

So, the rapture is still planned for "any day now, real soon, really!"

That's all you had to say.

3/26/2009 9:49:08 PM

Dark_Lord_Prime

Also, that's only three, stupid.

3/26/2009 9:49:44 PM

rubber chicken

I look forward to it not happening. Again!

3/26/2009 9:55:02 PM

dpareja

@Dark_Lord_Prime: Well, in all fairness, two of the matrices could have given the same solution.

But this is still crazy stupid.

3/26/2009 9:55:21 PM

ausador

Numerology for Jesus...oh, wait...

Dark arts for Jesus. :P

3/26/2009 10:03:02 PM

MPW

Their scientific and mathematical rigor is something for us all to aspire to.

"Is it possible that..." I love the way people throw this phrase around. The answer could be "Yes, I suppose" to almost any question phrased this way.

In almost any situation, "Is it probable" or "Is it likely" is the proper question.

3/26/2009 10:04:34 PM

Dio Fa

The Raptard Code. Now available at a bookstore near you.

Can we laugh and point fingers at you on December 31, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2014, & 2015?

3/26/2009 10:06:22 PM

Dexter

I'm getting really tired about this nonsense.

Every year the same bull... "This is it! The rapture! This year! JEEZUS IS COMING! MARK MY WORDS!!!"

What a pathetic loser you are...

3/26/2009 10:09:48 PM

picklemonster

Just like in 1666, 1872, 2000, 2001, 1999, 1745, etc, etc, etc.

3/26/2009 10:25:21 PM

Hammurabi

And when 2016 rolls around and there is no magical "poof" out of existence for all the raptards, I presume they will offer an official apology and renounce their deathwish.

Oh wait... a prophecy has been revealed to me: once these lunatics aren't whisked away into their grotesque and slightly homoerotic (admit it) jesus fantasy by the end of 2015 they will make new "more accurate" predictions about when the rapture will actually happen

3/26/2009 10:44:31 PM

agentCDE

Here we go again.

3/26/2009 10:47:00 PM



So um... why would the Hebrew calendar matter in a book written in English?

You guys will continue to find whatever you want to find in it and interpret it to fit your particular desires. I don't think even Jesus would want you spending all your time trying to figure out a hidden agenda inside the Bible. He seemed more of a "live now" kind of guy.

3/26/2009 11:04:34 PM

Mihangel apYrs

"Is it possible that it has been concealed or hidden (ENCODED) within the scriptures themselves "


or again, maybe not.

3/26/2009 11:48:12 PM

Ouabache

I can see the fnords!!!

3/26/2009 11:52:26 PM



the rapture: always about to happen *facepalm*

the only way we've been living in the end times for the last 2000 years is if we count geological time... which wouldn't exist if these were really the endtimes, because then the earth would be only 6000 years old, and 1/3 of the existence of the world != endtimes.

3/27/2009 12:04:19 AM

toothache

From my old exam paper:
"Full credit will only be given when the solution contains appropriate working."

3/27/2009 12:13:53 AM

NonProphet

Someone screenshot that and email it to the author on September 20th.

3/27/2009 12:18:11 AM

Nowonmai

Still on the flexible 'any day now' schedule?

3/27/2009 12:27:34 AM

Evilutionist

It is MORE possible that you and everyone like you are just desperate and stupid.

3/27/2009 12:28:41 AM

Nowonmai

NonProphet

Someone screenshot that and email it to the author on September 20th.


Consider it done.. and I scrapbooked it with FireFox too. Just in case the idiot tries some inventive editing.

3/27/2009 12:30:24 AM

Higgs Boson

Quick, someone buy the domain names rapture2010, rapture2011, rapture2012, rapture2013, ... , rapture2500 with in .com, .org, .net!

3/27/2009 1:30:34 AM

LDM

It's so amusing when people try to use big words and numbers to make themselves sound smarter.

3/27/2009 1:32:46 AM

Thinking Allowed

The word "RAPTURE" has been said not to appear in the Bible.

That's because it's not in the bible.

3/27/2009 1:37:21 AM

Tallyho

In the rather sparse forum, some grouchy old bint from the UK is predicting 22 July 2009.

She thought it would be after the eclipse on August 1 last year, but was utterly dissapointed. She needed something else to be a sign so --- she picked an eclipse on July 22 this year.

The mind boggles!

3/27/2009 1:46:24 AM

Orion

You know the "bible" code (using numerology to select letters and form words) has been successfully applied to Harry Potter just to show how stupid it is?

No, of course not, it'll be any day now till the day you die.

3/27/2009 2:00:14 AM
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