Quote# 61507
[Thread: Did God give us a hint with these foods??]
I got the coolest email about these foods. Take a look.
A sliced Tomato ---looks like 4 chambers of the heart and this veg is
excellent for heart health
Wal-nut----looks like a little brain, left and right side. We know that
there are 3 dozen neuron transmitters that walnuts help
in the brain.
Celery----looks like our bone. Celery has 23% sodium (or might have been
calcium) and so does our bone.
sliced carrot----looks like the human eye....carrots are great for eye health.
olives-------like ovaries-----olives help ovary function
kidney beans-----like our kidneys--help in kidney function with their nutriction.
Avacado, eggplants, pears------Uterus (avacado even has a "baby" seed
inside. These help target uterus function
figs--------male---they are full of seeds and hang in twos. Figs can
help with male fertility.
Oranges---sliced--like female breast for nursing. Oranges help function
of mammary glands
pedxing,
Rapture Ready 102 Comments [4/17/2009 8:48:03 PM]
Fundie Index: 56
1 2 3 4 5
#941704
aaa
What.
4/18/2009 5:47:02 AM
#941712
DaMentalFunism: While I doubt pedxing knows it, I think this is referring to a sagittal cross-section diagram of breast tissue. And as we all know anatomical diagrams look EXACTLY like their real-life counterparts*.
*If only that were true. I wouldn't have had nearly the trouble I had in comparative anatomy finding some of the parts I was supposed to.
4/18/2009 6:06:30 AM
#941722
solomongrundy
Hemlock Water Dropwort: looks next to identical to a parsnip but it's deadly poisonous, eating one root will kill a cow (or you). I wonder what God was thinking of when he created that one.
4/18/2009 6:20:59 AM
#941723
clockworkgirl21
I can't comment on the others, but for these:
sliced carrot----looks like the human eye....carrots are great for eye health.
What? No, it doesn't. Besides, I heard that was a myth. Carrots even contain something that can make you blind if you eat too much of it at once.
olives-------like ovaries-----olives help ovary function
Ovary function isn't too complicated. Every month, release an egg. Release a few chemicals. What help does it need?
Avacado, eggplants, pears------Uterus (avacado even has a "baby" seed
inside. These help target uterus function
Uterus function? Unless you're pregnant, your uterus doesn't do shit!
figs--------male---they are full of seeds and hang in twos. Figs can help with male fertility.
That made me giggle.
Oranges---sliced--like female breast for nursing. Oranges help function of mammary glands
No. Sorry. You probably made up the others, too.
I'm surprised you didn't say "Kiwi. Looks like testicles. Helps sperm."
4/18/2009 6:25:41 AM
#941724
fromdownunder.
You have convinced me that God exists.
Take me to your weeder.
Norm
4/18/2009 6:27:50 AM
#941731
D Laurier.
Wow, Making up shit to cover your own ignorance.
4/18/2009 6:44:14 AM
#941734
Gawd
There you have it ladies, eat olives to ward off ovarian cysts and neoplasms.
4/18/2009 6:51:00 AM
#941740
*Sigh* Twatwaddle.
4/18/2009 7:05:50 AM
#941742
Blackvoice
What does durian help with?
4/18/2009 7:07:03 AM
#941766
Morrigan
This is XIII century medicine guys
4/18/2009 7:53:33 AM
#941769
Horsefeathers
Ah, so this is what passes as evidence at Rapture Ready.
Interesting.
4/18/2009 7:55:04 AM
#941781
Paschal Wagner
In that case, papayas make you bald, chili peppers shrink your dick, and raspberries give you skin cancer.
4/18/2009 8:17:52 AM
#941783
Frank
Hmmm. So what body part are Bananas good for?
4/18/2009 8:19:08 AM
#941788
Xotan
I suppose digitalis helps with fingering?
4/18/2009 8:25:37 AM
#941789
Moondog
The stomach of a ruminant has four chambers, like our heart. Cows are ruminants. So eating lots of steak should be good for the heart. Oh, wait, no it isn't. You're just full of shit.
4/18/2009 8:35:00 AM
#941804
MK
Who knew that you didn't need to buy Viagra? Just eat a bunch of fig newtons.
4/18/2009 9:25:28 AM
#941807
Raskolnikov
Big thingy-like turnip: makes your thingy grow.
4/18/2009 9:29:03 AM
#941810
Pyena
Didn't people believe stuff like this a few centuries ago?
4/18/2009 9:33:30 AM
#941817
Lucilius
I'm gonna eat the biggest cucumbers I can find, and staaaart hoping!
@Raskolnikov: Blackadder fan, are we?
4/18/2009 9:53:17 AM
#941821
And ginger, which is good for nausea, looks like... um...
4/18/2009 10:38:59 AM
#941826
DevilsChaplain
"Oranges---sliced--like female breast for nursing."
Really? Really? I just don't see it:
Well, maybe it looks a tad like a nipple, but still...
4/18/2009 11:16:34 AM
#941828
DevilsChaplain
"figs--------male---they are full of seeds and hang in twos"
Oh for Christ's sake, just say it, ya fuckin' prude: TESTICLES! SCROTUM! BALLSACK!
4/18/2009 11:18:39 AM
#941829
I've seen a video on YouTube making these same claims. This is no poe, my friends. They actually try to argue this, despite the fact that it doesn't follow.
4/18/2009 11:21:00 AM
#941846
Old Viking
The first time I see someone whose eyes look like carrots I'll back-pedal very rapidly.
4/18/2009 1:03:02 PM
#941850
Vince
Idiot, looks like you, because you are one.
4/18/2009 1:14:58 PM
1 2 3 4 5