Home Archives Random Quotes Latest Comments Top 100 Submit Quote Search Log In

Quote# 62621

[when asked to provide proof that all acts of gay sex caused physical harm and therefore should be outlawed]

Are you serious?!! When a muscle is misused consistently, it eventually fails to work properly. That's a fact of life. The particular muscle I'm referring to was designed to be an exit only.

Smoking is questionable because it doesn't affect everyone the same way. Drinking does not need to be illegal, but getting drunk should remain so, yes.

BigJohnson, TheologyOnline 41 Comments [5/25/2009 7:35:49 AM]
Fundie Index: 40
Submitted By: Kaylee
WTF?! || meh
Username:
Comment:



1 2
lol what

Wait... are you suggesting that gay sex will eventually make one unable to defecate?

5/25/2009 7:43:55 AM

Lucilius

And you're misusing the muscular hole on your upper end, TinyJohnson. Or are you speaking with the lower one?

5/25/2009 7:51:17 AM

Not_You

Getting drunk isn't illegal (unless you're driving or homeless). I've yet to hear of anyone getting charged with public intox without doing anything else.

5/25/2009 7:59:03 AM

Tearlich

"BigJohnson" I'm calling Poe.

5/25/2009 8:07:10 AM

John

When a muscle is misused consistently, it eventually fails to work properly. That's a fact of life. So let's outlaw running, tennis and computer keyboards.

5/25/2009 8:16:29 AM

shykid

The particular muscle I'm referring to was designed to be an exit only.

That ain't what you said last night, buddy.

5/25/2009 8:18:31 AM

Mayhem

"When a muscle is misused consistently, it eventually fails to work properly."

Your carpal tunnel syndrome would like a word with you. Plus, the butthole is not a muscle. It's, you know... a hole.

5/25/2009 8:22:56 AM

Giveitaday

Are you serious?!! When a muscle is misused consistently, it eventually fails to work properly

Anatomy doesn't work that way. You are really grasping at straws now aren't you?

That's a fact of life.

That's not much coming from someone with such a fluid definition of "fact".

The particular muscle I'm referring to was designed to be an exit only.

So why doesn't regular anal sex have detrimental effects in heterosexual couples? It can't be physically harmful in homosexual sex and not harmful is heterosexual sex. So unless there are countless women losing the "use" of certain muscles (and there are not) then your argument fails to pass the most basic of tests.

Smoking is questionable because it doesn't affect everyone the same way.

And that in no way supports you're theory that homosexual sex should be made illegal.

Drinking does not need to be illegal, but getting drunk should remain so, yes.

How can getting drunk remain illegal if it's not illegal in the first place? And what's your point, that being gay is fine, but gay people can't have sex?

The law has no place in the bedroom. How would you enforce the outlawing of gay sex? Would you advocate putting cameras in everybody's bedroom and have the Sex Police moniter their activites? Are you going to have random inspections? How could you prove such allegations? Are you willing to have your sex life monitered at all times? I doubt that you are. Such a law couldn't just target suspected gays, it would, by necessity, have to apply to everyone since people can't be identified as "gay" on sight alone, Therefore the only effective way to implement such a law would be to place every citizen under 24/7 video monitering. Such a measure is not only impractical but damn near impossible. I'd like my elected representatives to go about actually running the country instead of passing draconian and unenforcible laws.



5/25/2009 8:26:22 AM

Zeus Almighty

Um, "Big Johnson?"
Poe.
And if overuse of muscles rendered them useless every homophobe would have permanently withered hands from wanking off to their thoughts about having teh buttseks with men in their churches.

5/25/2009 8:30:57 AM

werewolf

I knew athletes were doing it wrong. Constant practice would eventually leave them paralyzed.

This guy needs to meet with the USOC.

Our athletes could be obese and unprepared but they'd still win gold medals.

Think of savings in time and money!

5/25/2009 8:44:33 AM



Well, following your logic, the active member of the pair is not sinning AND heterosexual sex should be allowed for women. And man, good luck when you're responsible of causing cancer in pregnant women.

5/25/2009 8:45:03 AM

Mudak

May you never have to have a colonoscopy...

It's already been established that the butthole isn't a muscle from a previous post. It's clear that this guy's brain muscles have already ceased to work properly by those same standards.

5/25/2009 9:06:42 AM

arcturus

you need to use more lube.

5/25/2009 9:18:33 AM

Marc

Are you serious?!! When a muscle is misused consistently, it eventually fails to work properly. That's a fact of life. The particular muscle I'm referring to was designed to be an exit only.

That's actually quite inaccurate.

but getting drunk should remain so, yes.

Getting drunk is not illegal. Being drunk in public and driving while drunk are, but getting drunk in and of itself is not illegal.

5/25/2009 9:25:21 AM



Wouldnt lesbians use their 'muscle' less? I cant see how rubbing it on something is worse than jamming something in there.

5/25/2009 9:36:12 AM

Papabear

That's why we see all gay men in huge wards for the anally incontinent when they reach middle-age.

P.S. Getting drunk is not illegal.

5/25/2009 9:39:32 AM

A Friend

And seeing how this guy has his head really far up his ass, I don't think he has any room to talk.

5/25/2009 9:42:44 AM

Tiger

Wait, what? You think that buttsex is dangerous, but smoking and drinking are completely benign? Go stick your head in an oven.

5/25/2009 9:47:38 AM



Define: misused.

I'm curious (but not bi-curious, wink-wink)

5/25/2009 10:19:10 AM

aaa

Face, meet my misused palm.

5/25/2009 10:24:02 AM

Sisyphus

He's almost right on this one. People who engage in anal sex (or give themselves a lot of enemas) tend to have relaxed sphincters and can *ahem* leak. However, who gives a flying fart? It's not your bum microdick.

Smoking is obnoxious but I don't agree that it should be banned by the government. Drinking... I hate people who drink and drive, or drink and become assholes, or drink to drown their sorrows but again, let people make their own choices.

5/25/2009 10:34:31 AM

LadyJafaria

I find it hard to believe that anyone calling itself 'BigJohnson' while railing against sex, gay or otherwise, is anything other than a troll.

5/25/2009 10:40:36 AM

Pule Thamex

Oh! You seem to be suggesting that the throat muscles are designed to be an exit only. So one should only regurgitate, expectorate, vomit and dribble through one's oral portal?

Mind you BigJohnson, I can quite see why you would think that, judging by the contents of your quote.

5/25/2009 10:41:43 AM

Misty

Blowjobs are bad too then? They're not supposed to go there either.

5/25/2009 10:43:02 AM

Mrs. Antichrist

1) Getting drunk isn't illegal so long as you're on private property and have the consent of the owner to be there, and being drunk in public is usually only prosecuted if you're either causing problems or driving. If you're drunk in your home, the cops can't do shit to you.

2) Smoking most definitely causes harm every single time you do it. I'm a smoker and even I accept that it's a dangerous, not to mention disgusting habit. Likewise, alcohol does damage to your body every single time you use it, although the effects are cumulative over time and usually only affect alcoholics. Your liver takes a hit, you become dehydrated, it irritates your stomach and throat, and it kills off brain cells. Fortunately, these effects are fairly minor if you only drink occasionally as your body can repair itself pretty quickly, but the point is that one night of drinking does more damage to your body than a night of anal sex. And having anal sex every single night vs drinking a 26 every single night... well, the 26 is gonna do more harm.

3) Not all homosexuals have anal sex, and of those that do, most aren't doing it to the extent where their anal sphincter is about to prolapse. Sex-related prolapses are usually causes by inserting very large objects into the rectum. At any rate, there are also heterosexuals who partake in anal sex. And what about lesbians? So, let's say we banned anal sex (which is a stupid idea, but for argument's sake let's pretend it's not). There are still other forms of sex that homosexuals can partake in, namely hand-jobs and oral. How are THOSE practices harming anyone?

Oh, and for the record, even missionary-style heterosexual sex can cause minor tissue damage. And while we're at it, running a marathon or participating in sports does plenty of damage to your muscles, yet no one seems to want to outlaw those. Hell, just taking a dump can injure you. Let's ban pooping while we're at it.

5/25/2009 11:12:53 AM
1 2