(This quote is from a long discussion on young earth vrs. old earth creationism. Gotta love when fundies fight, it just proves the ridiculous nature of the buy-bull.)
I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather, controlled flocks of birds, controlled infestations of insects, controlled the earth itself, and overridden the 'laws' of physics. My personal experiences align with what Jesus said in a literal way, therefore I know that Creation must be a living thing able to obey me. That is just one more reason I don't buy the 'science' you are trying to sell. It does not allow for Creation to manifest a will of it's own, which will Jesus attested to and faith activates.
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"I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather, controlled flocks of birds, controlled infestations of insects, controlled the earth itself, and overridden the 'laws' of physics."
No you haven't, you're a liar.
"My personal experiences align with what Jesus said in a literal way, therefore I know that Creation must be a living thing able to obey me. That is just one more reason I don't buy the 'science' you are trying to sell. It does not allow for Creation to manifest a will of it's own, which will Jesus attested to and faith activates."
Jesus did not exist.
That is just one more reason I don't buy the 'science' you ard trying to sell.
Dude, meds your doctor prescribed you are not theoretical 'science', they are practice.
But aren't all the things you just mentioned...MAGIC, which is forbidden by your religion?
I mean, you're not even saying "Jesus did it through me," you're saying "I did it." If creation really has a will of its own, then you can't control that will except by magic.
Now go pray for forgiveness to your God, because you're either lying or doing magic, and both of those are sins in the eyes of YHWH.
"I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather, controlled flocks of birds, controlled infestations of insects, controlled the earth itself, and overridden the 'laws' of physics."
How is it people who say things like this aren't locked up somewhere in a room with rubber wallpaper?
"My personal experiences align with what Jesus said in a literal way, therefore I know that Creation must be a living thing able to obey me."
Or, you know, you're fucking delusional .
"That is just one more reason I don't buy the 'science' you are trying to sell. It does not allow for Creation to manifest a will of it's own, which will Jesus attested to and faith activates."
Get some help. Fast. I'm completely serious here.
Ya know, I've controlled flocks of birds, too. Run full force, arms flailing into wherever they're nesting and they will fly away.
I'm guessing that by "controll[ing] the weather" he means that he made it rain by washing his car...
And, of course, he bought some bug spray.
Everything else is bullshit.
I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather. Just the other day, I said "gee, I wish we'd see the sun for a change", and today it's sunny. I even controlled the Weather Channel, because they said last night it would be sunny today. Now if only I could apply that incredible power to important stuff like curing cancer or giving good jobs to all the people who are out of work.
@mudak - my Chesapeake used to control flocks of birds like that every morning. He was damn proud of himself, too.
Damn, if I could control insects, it would make feeding my reptiles a hell of a lot easier. Hey WM, wanna teach me just that part?
/gotta be kidding me
Hmm. . . so have I (except the laws of physics thing), but I wouldn't describe it in such grand terms. I work with a number of trained birds, eliminated infestations by removing food sources, and sometimes I dig in the dirt for one reason or another. And it's still invalid, but appeal to yourself as authority works a lot better if you're actually an authority.
"I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather, controlled flocks of birds, controlled infestations of insects, controlled the earth itself, and overridden the 'laws' of physics."
WITCH!!!!!!! BURN HIM!!!! BURN THE WITCH!!!!!!
I thought commentary wasn't allowed in submissions anymore, except for context? Hmmm.
Anyway, [citation needed].
myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather, controlled flocks of birds, controlled infestations of insects, controlled the earth itself, and overridden the 'laws' of physics.
http://psipog.net/home.html
Why don't you check that site out, I'm sure they'd love to hear from you.
Last week when it was very hot and we had chance of rain, I told someone I wished it would rain very hard and the temperature drop 20 degrees. And it did! I must have super weather controlling powers or something!
Seriously, the last person I knew who claimed to control the weather was seriously insane. He also claimed that aliens were flying around his house and the government was shooting lasers at them, because he found leaves with tiny holes in them.
I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather, controlled flocks of birds, controlled infestations of insects, controlled the earth itself, and overridden the 'laws' of physics.
"Nooooooooooo, you must not read from the Book!!!"
/Mummy
Wow. Just wow. If this isn't a blantant case of I'm-the-center-of-the-universe belief, please show me what is.
By the way, Jesus Christ never said that you had to disregard all science to be faithful to him.
"I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather, controlled flocks of birds, controlled infestations of insects, controlled the earth itself, and overridden the 'laws' of physics. "
Oh really? I think James Randi would like a word with you. Oh wait, nevermind, he doesn't really take challenges from nobodies like you anymore and tries to go after the big names in "phychic/paranormal" phenomena.
"I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather, controlled flocks of birds, controlled infestations of insects, controlled the earth itself, and overridden the 'laws' of physics. My personal experiences align with what Jesus said in a literal way, therefore I know that Creation must be a living thing able to obey me. That is just one more reason I don't buy the 'science' you are trying to sell. It does not allow for Creation to manifest a will of it's own, which will Jesus attested to and faith activates."
As Dr. Evil would say, 'Riiiiiight'.
Yes, yes. Science is a crude attempt to separate you from your godlike powers.
Do you want to reach through the internet and strangle me?
Bring it.
I always love to watch fundies try and out-bullshit each other. What was the comeback, the other guy destroyed the universe and recreated it last Thursday?
I bet this guy couldn't control my dog.
"I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather,"
Are you the one causeing global warming?
"I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather, controlled flocks of birds, controlled infestations of insects, controlled the earth itself, and overridden the 'laws' of physics." Doesn't that sound like witchcraft to you?
"I myself have on very many occasions controlled the weather, controlled flocks of birds, controlled infestations of insects, controlled the earth itself, and overridden the 'laws' of physics."
BURN THE WITCH!
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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