Quote# 6609

By God's standards, is letting your pet lick/kiss you considered beastiality?... Sometimes pets like dogs and cats like to show affection by coming up and licking or giving you a nudge on the face and what not. Do you think that letting your pet do this qualifies as beastiality?

Hughes, Rapture Ready 27 Comments [4/1/2004 12:00:00 AM]
Fundie Index: 7

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The line is generally considered to involve peanut butter.

7/4/2006 5:39:47 AM


Yes, yes it does. In fact the animal initiated bestiality without your consent. If your dog licks you it's the eqivalent of being raped by your dog.

11/19/2006 7:57:21 AM


Sure. That's why there are loads of bestiality paysites out there with hot, uncensored facelicking action.

11/19/2006 12:35:26 PM


I really, really pity God.

11/19/2006 1:16:11 PM


This is just too funny.

1/18/2007 2:18:27 AM


Oh no...my cat walked across my crotch earlier today...does that mean I'm going to hell?

1/18/2007 2:26:14 AM


So... when my cat schnooks me... he's actually trying to get it on? Gay beastiality? *dies* x_X

1/18/2007 2:36:36 AM


Only if you're not married.

3/5/2007 7:52:38 PM

Brian X

Another case of a good person being horribly screwed up by Christianity. It defies logic that someone would either wonder such a thing, and I hope they realize eventually that it's a silly question they need not worry about.

3/5/2007 8:23:06 PM


So I should stop letting my dog lick my balls?

3/5/2007 8:27:00 PM


My dog likes to get onto the bed and snuggle up with me and my husband. Yay! Threesome!!

1/28/2011 8:42:26 AM


The things you people worry about. I mean seriously do you think that your pet thinks it is a sexual act when they "kiss" you? You can't be that stupid, can you?

Oh wait, Rapture Ready...sorry.

1/28/2011 9:20:20 AM


It's a sin if you orgasm or your enjoyment of the licking distracts you from your enjoyment of God. God himself is the only being that can lick you immaculately.

1/28/2011 9:27:30 AM


Yes, yes it does. It's not natural for pets to bond with their owners, and show affection like that. If your pet tends to do these kinds of things, it probably has some sexual attire towards you, and should be considered sinful.


1/28/2011 9:32:11 AM


Only if it turns you on, you freak.

5/23/2011 8:43:10 AM


I can't think of anything better to say than...oh, for fuck's sake.

5/24/2011 6:12:38 AM

After all, Jesus may have his reasons for not coming back.

11/7/2011 8:14:36 AM


No, thats known as inter-species familiarity or affection. That you fundies can't see the difference explains your incest issues though.

It's not sex until it is. Get it?

11/10/2011 4:08:18 PM

rubber chicken

It depends, does this behaviour make you all 'tingly'? Do you dream about your pet showing you affection and maybe a little more ? Do you reciprocate ?

11/10/2011 8:30:54 PM


Yes, that's bestiality alright, you perverted sinner. You're going to burn in hell forever unless you make penance by selling all your worldly goods and donating the money raised to an animal shelter. There's is no other way -- act now or burn!

11/11/2011 11:29:08 AM


Hughes: Granpappy, is Ah a-goin' tuh Haayle fur beast-ah-aliteh 'cuz mah coon dawg likes a-likkin' mah fayce?
Granpappy: Shucks, Hughes, y'all KNOWS it's okaiy eein thuh aies of thuh LAWRD s'long as y'all thanks about JAYSUS whiyun y'all duz it. Naow go n' fahnd yuh sistuh, y'all's goy sum BAYBEH MAKIN' tuh do so y'alls kin GLAWRIFAH thuh LAWD n' make mo' li'l Chruschuns.

12/8/2012 7:14:50 AM


> Sometimes pets like dogs and cats like to show affection by coming up and licking or giving you a nudge on the face and what not.
Do you know what a real "kiss" is?

12/8/2012 12:57:45 PM


I doubt your dog has any sexual intent when licking you, so I think you are OK.

12/8/2012 1:00:55 PM

Do you suck on or lick the dog in return ?
It is only a sin if you pet the dog or cat because its mutual enjoyment.

12/9/2012 11:12:51 AM


Yes, and when your Grandma pinches your cheek, it's incest.

12/6/2015 4:33:45 PM

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