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#1055159
Cagoguy
FIXED
God: Let's see, you voted for Bush?
Bushvoter: Yes
God: Can you tell me why you did that?
Bushvoter: Because he said he loved you.
God: Did you see what happened the first time you voted for him?
Bushvoter: Yes, but he said he was Christian.
God: Did you know he unlawfully attacked a country and other things that I hate?
Bushvoter: Yea, I kinda did know it.
God: Do you know what I say about murder and life?
Bushvoter: Yea, but I just thought...
God: How could you say you love me and still vote for someone you KNEW would allow and even support killing innocent people among other things? Exactly who do you love?
11/12/2009 12:47:09 PM
#1055177
Wehpudicabok
Obamavoter: EVEN BETTER AS ONE WORD? I THINK SO
Edit: tracer, have 1 free Internet for the best theology evar.
11/12/2009 12:51:19 PM
#1055204
Phloom
They just can't come clean, they hate President Obama because he is a fucking nigger.
11/12/2009 1:00:08 PM
#1055207
Mrs. Antichrist
I don't care what Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny think either.
11/12/2009 1:01:24 PM
#1055216
RustyShackleford
Those emoticons somehow make that stupid post even more inane.
11/12/2009 1:04:40 PM
#1055228
C_V
well sunshine, you've just presumed to know the mind of Ghod. no cloud-land for you!
11/12/2009 1:07:50 PM
#1055234
tracer
"God: How could you say you love me and still vote for someone you KNEW would allow and even support killing babies among other things? Exactly who do you love?"
Obamavoter: Doesn't matter. So long as I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior at the moment of my death, I get to go to heaven no matter what.
God: But --
Obamavoter: You made the rules.
God: ME DAMN IT!!
11/12/2009 1:11:52 PM
#1055236
Argle Bargle
What the Bible says about abortion:
Exodus 21,22:
If men strive, and hurt a woman with child, so that her fruit depart from her, and yet no mischief follow: he shall be surely punished according as the woman's husband will lay upon him; and he shall pay as the judges determine.
What Jesus said about politics:
Matthew 21,22:
Give to Caesar what is Caesar's, and to God what is God's.
11/12/2009 1:12:09 PM
#1055239
tracer
Oh, and:
"God: Did you know he was for abortion and other things that I hate?"
Chapter and Verse where God says ANYTHING about abortion, please.
11/12/2009 1:13:40 PM
#1055263
David B.
"God: How could you say you love me and still vote for someone you KNEW would allow and even support killing babies among other things? Exactly who do you love?"
Obamavoter: Geez, if you're so dead set against him, why did you elevate him to the office of president in the first place?
God: What? I did no such thing!
Obamavoter: Sure you did. In the bible it says all who rule do so by your will.
God: Well... er...
Obamavoter: So since I don't pretend to know your will, just as the bible says I shouldn't, and since neither candidate was wholly in tune with Christ's teachings, I voted for the one I thought might be more so and left the final decision in your almighty hands.
God: Well you were wrong, you should have voted for the other guy!
Obamavoter: But since Obama's victory can only have been by your will, to have voted against him would have been to rebel against you. Why am I being chastised for bringing about your will?
God: Because that's what I do, okay? If you'd read you bible a bit more closely, you'd know that I set people up for a fall then put the whole blame on them for falling. Do you think Eve didn't say the exact same thing? Or Satan?
Obamavoter: But that isn't fair...
God: Look I'm God, okay? I don't have to be fair! Now to Hell with you! *ZAP!*
11/12/2009 1:24:14 PM
#1055276
Mister Spak
This is what I keep seeing in my minds eye:
God:Matthew 25:43 (King James Version)
43I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not.
Fundie:Matthew 25:44 (King James Version)
44Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee?
God: Matthew 25:45 (New International Version)
45"He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.'
Fundie: Yeah but I just thought . . .
God: And while we're on the subject of obeying me, Islam is the real religion. Too ban you didn't figure that out before it was too late.
11/12/2009 1:28:21 PM
#1055295
redlemon
Okay, so out of EVERYTHING a person will do in their life, God will only focus on Obama voting?
And how long are these interviews with god on judgment day going to be? There's a whole lot of people, and if he's gonna go line by line and include shit like who you voted for, that line into heaven will be an eternity itself.
11/12/2009 1:37:19 PM
#1055296
Danny Noonan
@David B - Bravo
11/12/2009 1:37:27 PM
#1055313
You have no idea what God thinks, you just pretend to. Given a guess, however, I'd have to go with the guy who promised that sick people would get some health care and we'd stop killing Iraquis, for starters.
And of course the death penalty never comes up in your pretense of loving "life", does it?
11/12/2009 1:45:29 PM
#1055323
WMDKitty
Um.... yeah, no. If "god" exists, he's probably more concerned with how you treat your fellow travelers than, say, politics, or who's sleeping with whom.
11/12/2009 1:50:26 PM
#1055334
What cracks me up is that you people never get the fact that the Republicans only use abortion as the carrot-and-stick to get you to the polls, year after year after year, but they never move to outlaw it, because if they did, they'd have lost the primary issue that gets you idiots to continue voting against your own interests.
You had a pretend-fundie president for 8 years, and most of that time, your party also controlled the House and the Senate. But they never outlawed abortion the way they led you to believe they would, did they?
11/12/2009 1:57:51 PM
#1055360
Thejebusfire
To that I would probably say: God, if you don't approve of killing innocent "babies" then why are their so many verses in the bible about child sacrafrace, stoning children, and even ripping the feti out of pregnant women?
11/12/2009 2:12:19 PM
#1055406
Sulis
Anybody remember that verse about god setting up the rulers he wants in the seats of power to rule over you? Your own buybull says it's totally god's fault Obama's in the white house, dimwits.
Also, those smilies make me want to smack you with a clue by four...
11/12/2009 2:40:05 PM
#1055415
Brianisha
What a vivid imagination.
god doesnt think like that.
epic fail!
11/12/2009 2:46:56 PM
#1055417
John
God: How could you say you love me and still vote for someone you KNEW would allow and even support killing babies among other things? Exactly who do you love?
Obamavoter: You went into all kinds of minute detail about who we're allowed to see naked and what we're allowed to eat, but then all you said was "thou shalt not murder" and expected us to assume that included a growth the size of a thumbnail on the wall of a woman's uterus. If you really hated abortion so much, why didn't you just come right out and say so?
And if you read our laws, you'd know that Obama can neither allow or forbid abortion. Anti-abortion laws were declared unconstitutional, and the President can't change the Constitution. And why aren't you going after the people who voted for George Bush? He didn't stop abortion, either.
11/12/2009 2:48:50 PM
#1055426
Jezebel's Evil Sister
Romans 13
Sulis: "Anybody remember that verse about god setting up the rulers he wants in the seats of power to rule over you? ..."
Here ya go:
Romans 13:1 Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.
13:2 Whosoever therefore resisteth the power, resisteth the ordinance of God: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation.
13:3 For rulers are not a terror to good works, but to the evil. Wilt thou then not be afraid of the power? do that which is good, and thou shalt have praise of the same.
13:4 For he is the minister of God to thee for good. But if thou do that which is evil, be afraid; for he beareth not the sword in vain: for he is the minister of God, a revenger to execute wrath upon him that doeth evil.
11/12/2009 2:56:23 PM
#1055430
justine
How the conversation would really go (assuming God is against abortion)
God: Let's see, you voted for Obama?
Obamavoter: Yes
God: Can you tell me why you did that?
Obamavoter: Well, Bush had made a hash of the economy, gotten us involved in pointless wars on false pretexts, and was running a facility where people were imprisoned without proper trial and tortured, in direct violation of the laws and principles of our country. That kind of killed my faith in the republican party. Obama seemed more likely to fix those problems than the other candidates did, and if nothing else he was charismatic and inspiring, which would help individual Americans to make a difference in their country.
God: Sound reasoning. Did you look at his voting record and other past records?
Obamavoter: Yes.
God: so you knew he was for abortion?
Obamavoter: Yes, but since the last pro life president didn't do much to prevent abortion, and his wars of agression killed a number of innocents, Obama's pro-choice stance wasn't a huge point against him for me.
God: You know what I say about murder and life.
Obamavoter: Yea, but I didn't have the greatest alternatives here...
11/12/2009 2:58:11 PM
#1055434
aaa
You can still commit several war crimes, as long as you vote for the GOP.
11/12/2009 2:58:39 PM
#1055455
Old Viking
Hearing a voice when no one is there is not good.
11/12/2009 3:14:16 PM
#1055459
Turtle
Not everyone voted for Obama because he was black.
(I was going to say no one, but unfortunately I've seen people who make it seem like a racial issue and act like Obama needed to win because he had the same skin color they did.)
11/12/2009 3:17:05 PM
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