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Quote# 683

[After being pointed to scripture that's interpreted as meaning you can have recreational sex as long as you're married]

I have a few things to say concerning this scripture. First, do this passages have to be referring to intercourse? Being satisfied by your wife's breasts and embracing a spouse's bosom does not sound like intercourse to me.

A Sheep, Christian Forums 19 Comments [9/1/2002 12:00:00 AM]
Fundie Index: 2
WTF?! || meh
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Redhunter

A Sheep

Gotta give you the 'truth in advertising' award for that one. You know what? Don't have sex. Nothing. With no one. We cannot risk the chance of you breeding with the general population. You could only be bred with really smart people in the outside chance that your 'intellect' cancels the other one out. If you need the help of a dusty old book to tell you if and when you should have sex, then just give up. You don't deserve it.

7/3/2006 9:42:52 AM

HairlessMonkeyDK

\"Being satisfied by your wife's breasts and embracing a spouse's bosom does not sound like intercourse to me\"

No, not intercourse.
It's called titfucking.

10/29/2006 10:13:38 AM

cyborgtroy

Bosoms are awesome....

2/15/2008 4:20:28 PM

Maeamian

While it doesn't sound like intercourse, it does sound like a good time to me.

4/21/2008 11:07:03 PM

Cabraxas

It just kills me,,,, the buybull is supposed to be the literal, infallible word of god,,,, so what the hell is it with all the interpretations?

4/21/2008 11:12:10 PM

Flatworm

You're a virgin, aren't you?

4/21/2008 11:16:27 PM



They're called boobs. Learn em. Love em.

12/4/2009 4:53:46 PM

louislois

Fundy/English Translator:

That scripture interpretation differs from mine. Therefore, it is wrong!

12/4/2009 5:06:00 PM



I love being satisfied by my wife's breasts

12/4/2009 10:17:17 PM

Brain_In_A_Jar

If it's a passage in the bible and it doesn't entail killing, the odds are pretty damn good it's about fucking.

12/5/2009 4:02:28 AM

LDM

Why is it always about technicalities with you people? Are all fundies lawyers or something? Or do you just need something to do in place of all that sex you're not having?

12/5/2009 4:55:16 AM



Being satisfied by your wife's breasts and embracing a spouse's bosom does not sound like intercourse to me.

Right, so you slap her tits around for an hour and then when she's all hot and ready you walk away? Wow, how perversely sadistic. Sounds like a sure-fire recipe for "Histrionic personality disorder".

12/5/2009 4:59:09 AM

Anon-e-moose

"Being satisfied by your wife's breasts and embracing a spouse's bosom does not sound like intercourse to me."



:9

One Word: Paizuri.

12/5/2009 8:57:29 AM



How about the rest of the passage? Do does have breasts? What about the simple bit, " Be exhilarated always with her love"? What's that mean?

12/10/2009 10:20:34 AM

Equalist

Titty fucking! It's biblical!

5/23/2010 12:08:29 AM

( . )( . )

Mmm. Breasts. That is all.

6/25/2010 2:17:36 PM

Moondog

If you don't like playing with your wife's boobs, can I do it?

6/25/2010 2:34:36 PM

David B.

"Being satisfied by your wife's breasts and embracing a spouse's bosom does not sound like intercourse to me."

So presumably being satisfied by another woman's breasts doesn't count as adultery either, right?

6/25/2010 2:50:35 PM

The Duelist

Your name says it all, friend. The Bible says everyone is just like a sheep, and they need a Shepard; Jeebus. What it fails to mention is that sheep are extremely stupid creatures with no free will who mindlessly follow the Shepard or bellwether anywhere it goes; even over a cliff.
And the funny part is....
You have to be a Christian Fundamentalist before you become a sheep.

Savvy?

8/7/2010 4:38:48 PM
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