So it seems that I have another religion to add to my collection, and that's OK. But I want more! I would like to be a member of your religion, but even though I'm a retard, it seems I'm not retarded enough. Can you help me TitansAFC to become sufficiently retarded so as to be able to, er, function like you.
Presumably, in order to be a novitiate, I must learn to accept at face value everything your religious authorities say, I must unthinkingly go through life fulfilling my base emotional needs, I must unquestioningly believe everything in the Bible to be literally true, I must be of a certain political persuasion which is somewhere to the right of Attila the Hun, I must know that all bad and disgusting things are actually Biblical, I must disdain all actual good things as being ungodly and unbiblical, and I must learn how to quell my questioning nature.
I realise that's a very tough training schedule and I'm not particularly looking forward to the grueling dribbling and drooling practice but I'm willing to give it a go. Are we allowed bibs? Does it also mean I have to give up all my other religions? Must i say goodbye forever to Satanism, Atheism, Liberalism, Scientficism, Leftism, Pro-Homo-Agendarism, Evolutionism, Darwinism, Educationism, Global Warmingism and a plethora of other isms to which I've been ascribed membership.
Looking forward to your help and advice.
