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Quote# 69962

Laura, it is the institution of marriage that really is that simple. Likewise, it is our fallible, human emotions that tend to make things more difficult and more complicated than they need be.

If, heaven forbid, one of my son's chose to be gay one day, or even claimed he felt so all his life and was just finally succumbing to his attractions and inclinations, I too would love him still. But I ask you this, why are acceptance and love mutually exclusive in your eyes? We love our children throughout their lives without accepting many of their behaviors. In fact, it is because we love them that we ache for them when they go astray. We are constantly working to iron out the kinks. We want our children to excel, to thrive, to reach their highest potential. For me, the same is true of their sexual behaviors. I will always accept my child - the child my Heavenly Father knows he can become. But I will never accept his lifestyle should he choose to pursue any sort of deviation of the one man, one woman gold standard relationship.

I too, would want my child to enjoy all the same rights and privileges that I enjoy. But I would not want him demanding their creation if it is clear they 1) do not exist, and 2) will do more harm than good. Nor would I help him to fight for those.

My child is not exempt from the absolutes of right and wrong simply because he is my child and I love him.

Pearl, blogspot 54 Comments [2/2/2010 9:07:01 AM]
Fundie Index: 30
WTF?! || meh
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WMDKitty

But... are there really absolutes of right and wrong?

I'm sure we can all agree that harming children is wrong, but we all differ on our definition of "harm" -- to one parent, a good spanking is harmful, to another, it is a good thing.

And likewise with sexual matters. What is "right" for one couple is most certainly not going to be "right" for another. Some people are gay, some straight, some bisexual, some asexual, some transgendered, and none of these is more "right" than any other, they simply are.

Now get over your silly prejudice, and accept reality.

2/2/2010 9:14:13 AM

Doubting Thomas

You're almost there. It's great that you say that you'll always accept your child even if he is gay, but I still sense some future friction because you say you won't accept his lifestyle. Part of acceptance of who a person is is accepting their lifestyle.

"I too, would want my child to enjoy all the same rights and privileges that I enjoy. But I would not want him demanding their creation if it is clear they 1) do not exist, and 2) will do more harm than good."

There's no reason that gays don't have the right to marry someone they love. And there's no evidence that allowing gays to marry will cause any harm at all. Banning gay marriage will not keep gay people from being gay.

2/2/2010 9:14:44 AM



http://www.jesusandmo.net/2010/01/12/kill/

2/2/2010 9:15:28 AM

Sisyphus

As this is the woman who thinks it's okay to pull on an infant's hair to stop him/her biting while on the breast. I have to conclude that she wouldn't know love if it bit her on the nose.

Pearl: You and your husband are evil people. God hates you. Satan hates you. Humanity hates you.

2/2/2010 9:16:21 AM

Quantum Mechanic

What if he chose to be straight?

Idiot.

2/2/2010 9:19:38 AM

Mister Spak

"Likewise, it is our fallible, human emotions that tend to make things more difficult and more complicated than they need be. "

As your fundie lifestyle demonstrates.

2/2/2010 9:22:58 AM

aaa

Lame shit. Not worth the bandwidth of this site.

2/2/2010 9:32:29 AM

Horsefeathers

"If, heaven forbid, one of my son's chose to be gay one day, or even claimed he felt so all his life and was just finally succumbing to his attractions and inclinations, I too would love him still."

Why the hell do you people think anyone chooses to be gay?

"But I ask you this, why are acceptance and love mutually exclusive in your eyes? We love our children throughout their lives without accepting many of their behaviors."

There's a difference between being a spoiled, self-centered, hissy-fit throwing rugrat and being gay. The two "behaviors" do not equate.

"In fact, it is because we love them that we ache for them when they go astray. We are constantly working to iron out the kinks. We want our children to excel, to thrive, to reach their highest potential. For me, the same is true of their sexual behaviors."

I'm pretty sure their "sexual behaviors" are none of your damned business once they reach adulthood.

"I will always accept my child - the child my Heavenly Father knows he can become. But I will never accept his lifestyle should he choose to pursue any sort of deviation of the one man, one woman gold standard relationship."

You're quite deluded if you think this "one man, one woman" bullshit is anything but a fairly recent contrivance of society.

"I too, would want my child to enjoy all the same rights and privileges that I enjoy. But I would not want him demanding their creation if it is clear they 1) do not exist, and 2) will do more harm than good. Nor would I help him to fight for those."

So, if some right or privilege doesn't now exist it should never exist. Is that what you're saying? How the hell do you think you got the ones you have? And who decides if they do "more harm than good" anyway? You?

"My child is not exempt from the absolutes of right and wrong simply because he is my child and I love him."

Moral absolutes do not exist. There is no such thing as always right and always wrong.

2/2/2010 9:33:40 AM

Mudak

Forget gay for a minute. Let's assume all of your sons turn out to be straight, just for the sake of argument. And let's assume, furthermore, that your son decides he's really heavily into the BDSM scene. And he wants to be dominated by a woman wearing a leather catsuit and high heels, and brandishing a whip. That's his sexual preference.

Would you accept this as well?

The point is, we've all got different turn-ons and turn-offs. Let your children figure out for themselves what they do and don't like, without judging them or their own inclinations. Because one thing that's probably true is: they won't necessarily prefer the same things you do.

2/2/2010 9:41:41 AM



I don't think you're using the phrase "mutually exclusive" quite right.

2/2/2010 9:42:01 AM

Doctor Fishcake

I almost meh'd this when she said she'd love her child no matter what.

But then I read between the lines and saw she doesn't mean it.

2/2/2010 9:42:52 AM

Swede

Iron out the kinks? Are your children bedsheets?

My parents fertilized our "kinks", kept us unique, and love us for the persons we ARE, not for the persons we COULD be. If we wanted help and advice, they were more than ready to give them (they still are, btw), but they were never forced upon us.

2/2/2010 9:43:02 AM

Berny

We will never have peace regarding the issue of sexuality as long as narrow-minded religiously retarded people like you continue to hold on to the outmoded notion that homosexuality is a "choice" or that there are such things as "moral absolutes" defined by your antiquated book of fairy tales.
Your mindset will someday be relegated to the garbage heap and it can't happen soon enough for me.

2/2/2010 9:51:29 AM

RavenWood

I am so sorry you are any where near children. Ever.

2/2/2010 9:51:42 AM

Joe Mama

So, basically Pearl is saying that she will always love her children no matter what but will try as hard as she can to change them from gay to straight and mold them into perfect little clones of her and her husband.

And Pearl, you should be glad you have the right to vote. Because 90 years ago women's right to vote didn't exist, and men believed that it would cause more harm than good.

@WMDKitty

I had the "Diff'rent Strokes" theme song running through my head when I read your post.

2/2/2010 10:17:50 AM

Sweet Fancy Moses

"But I ask you this, why are acceptance and love mutually exclusive in your eyes?"

They're not. If you love somebody, you accept them for who they are. If you can't accept somebody for who they are, then you probably don't love them.

2/2/2010 10:26:44 AM

John

Fifty years ago, people were still making the exact same argument about marrying someone of another race. They thought mixing the races was an "absolute wrong", too, and even quoted the Bible to support it.

2/2/2010 11:10:31 AM

Almafeta

"Love." You keep saying that word. I do not think that word means what you think it means.

2/2/2010 11:11:28 AM

freako104

What if your kids get into a polyamorous relationship? What if they are gay? How is either wrong? Gays deserve the same rights we have. And no they aren't wrong for being different. Your absolutes don't exist

2/2/2010 11:28:13 AM

Jesus Klingon

You love your son, but you don't like what he does. That's the sign of a responsible parent, and I see nothing wrong with that.

But forget what you've been told. There is nothing wrong with being gay - nothing. There's no relativism in this. You should be happy that your son becomes an intelligent, morally grounded, well-rounded gay man. And the fact that you accept that your son is attracted to men does not mean that you have to accept the one he chooses. The world is full of mothers-in-law who would rather that their son or daughter had picked somebody else, and there's no reason why you can't have feelings like that.

He might make big mistakes - huge ones. And you should still be there for him. But his sexual orientation is not one of those mistakes.

2/2/2010 11:31:41 AM

AuraTwilight

The sad part is that Pearl would probably be perfectly accepting of her son's hypothetical homosexuality if not for her religion. She's SO close...so close that she's in the realm of sane, normal Christians of the nation. This is not fundie. This is merely an honest, loving woman who wants to reconcile her faith and her family. She doesn't deserve to be our laughing stock.

2/2/2010 11:40:28 AM



Not accepting something as difficult as that can really put a strain on a relationship. You might still love your child, but if you antagonize their natural feelings at an early age, then it's possible that they won't love you back. Yes, it is possible that a child can not love their parents and vice-versa. It's a tragedy when it happens, but it can happen.

By the way, the concepts of "right and wrong" vary not only from culture to culture but from person to person.

2/2/2010 11:50:51 AM

GodotIsWaiting4U

You don't understand what the phrase "mutually exclusive" means. You are suggesting that you can either love them or accept them, but cannot do both. Untrue.

2/2/2010 12:08:31 PM

Zeus Almighty

If, heaven forbid, one of my son's chose to be a CHRISTIAN FUNDAMENTALIST one day, or even claimed he felt so all his life and was just finally succumbing to his attractions and inclinations, I too would love him still.
I too, would want my child to enjoy all the same rights and privileges that I enjoy. But I would not want him demanding their creation if it is clear they 1) do not exist, and 2) will do more harm than good. Nor would I help him to fight for those.

2/2/2010 12:19:55 PM

Old Viking

Observe my definitions of right and wrong and you'll find that I'm not at all judgmental.

2/2/2010 12:34:39 PM
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