Quote# 71775


God began touching folks’ teeth.

And one fellow had a full set of dentures . . . and they suddenly began to feel uncomfortable like there was something under them. He took them out and soon found he had a whole set of teeth growing in. I think they grew in fully before the evening was over.

I could stand that!

Once in a church 35 years or so ago I was standing next to a friend in the sound booth during a visiting evangelist’s ministering . . . teeth being one of the things that tended to be touched in his services. And my friend starts feeling a spot turn warm in his mouth just like the evangelist warned about. So he went to the men’s room to check and sure enough—there was a new filling and he didn’t even know he needed one.

The evangelist said he had no idea why God filled some with gold, some silver and some just got new teeth.

Interesting . . . sounds like God’s humor, to me.

Quix, Free Republic 91 Comments [3/30/2010 3:52:29 AM]
Fundie Index: 84
Submitted By: Justin

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....what the fuck. how does one get this retarded?

3/30/2010 3:57:15 AM


If God can do that, then why can't he move them out of that seedy, rotting storefront in one of the crappiest parts of town?

3/30/2010 3:58:21 AM

Blaidd Drwg


I want to see sworn affadavits from these people's dentists - dentists that treated them BEFORE this "miracle" as well as after.

3/30/2010 4:12:27 AM

rubber chicken

And not a single person in the audience had the wit to record this 'miracle' by taking photo's or video.
Nobody in the entire congregation had the intelligence to get in touch with the local TV news who would have had a film crew there to document the whole thing before you could say "Fuck me! that guy has teeth growing in his mouth".
Either the entire church consists of slack-jawed idiots without a single iota of wit and intelligence or Quix is lying like a badly made carpet.
On second thoughts, both of those options are likely.

3/30/2010 4:19:36 AM


And i'm a nigerian prince who would like to transfer 20 million sterling pounds to your account.

3/30/2010 4:21:26 AM

Philbert McAdamia

I think somebody got "touched" in the head.

3/30/2010 4:25:31 AM


...and then the hallucinogens wore off.

3/30/2010 4:35:42 AM


God moves in mysterious ways, his dentistry to perform.

Surely he has something better to do with his time, like smiting paedophile priests and ordering Pope Joe to compensate their victims.

3/30/2010 4:41:53 AM

Dan Onymous

Reminds me of the Lard song - Can God Fill Teeth?

3/30/2010 4:59:42 AM


My new whatthefuck? meter goes up to eleven.

3/30/2010 5:05:37 AM

Mister Spak

"sounds like God’s humor, to me."

Sounds like gullible fundies to me.

3/30/2010 5:12:26 AM

Sorry, Quix, lying for Jebus is still lying. See you in the Lake of Fire(tm) someday. I'll be the one on the inflatable lounge chair sipping whiskey and maggots.

sounds like God’s humor, to me.

Sounds more like your bullshit to me.

Maybe that's too harsh. I mean, after all, this was at an I-HOP prayer meeting in Kansas. You know, that black hole of intellect and rationality in the USA.

3/30/2010 5:18:29 AM


er...that didn't really happen did it.

3/30/2010 6:09:01 AM


Interesting . . . sounds like God’s humor, to me.

Smells like bullshit to me.

3/30/2010 6:09:15 AM


I don't even know where to start.

3/30/2010 6:10:03 AM

Doubting Thomas

Lying for Jesus, I see. Funny how God is a dentist all of a sudden. The only way I could actually believe God did this were if the guy who grew new teeth died from cancer a couple days later.

"I mean, after all, this was at an I-HOP prayer meeting in Kansas. You know, that black hole of intellect and rationality in the USA. "

Hey, that's not fair! It's only the 2,818,717 idiots who spoil it for the other 30 of us.

3/30/2010 6:18:03 AM

Big Jilm

Sounds like schizo-fucking-phrenia to me there knuckle-dragger.

3/30/2010 6:36:36 AM


Interesting is indeed the word for it.

I think someone had a biiit too much of the laughing gas on the last trip to the dentist.

3/30/2010 6:39:32 AM


Interesting...sounds like BS to me.

3/30/2010 6:44:33 AM


The guy who had dentures would be on record for being fitted with them.
Let's see those records.

The Lying For Jesus things getting outta hand

3/30/2010 6:52:04 AM

Doctor Whom

The "miracle" of the gold fillings has been thoroughly debunked. Try again.

3/30/2010 7:08:11 AM


Holy fuck...

I wish I had no scruples and a mailing list of people like this. I'd be rich I tells ya, rich!

3/30/2010 7:08:14 AM


Okay, then the guy with the dentures can very easily go on CNN and bring both his former dentures and his dental records. Not only does he become world famous but he also saves the souls of billions. It's a win-fucking-win. In fact, forget CNN, ANY news organization (except FOX, who was demonstrated in a court of law to be lying and to have the right to continue lying) will do.

3/30/2010 7:10:51 AM

Rumpshaker Slim

Not only that, but his new teeth can chew through cinder blocks!

He now fights crime as THE CHOMPER! Dispensing pearly white justice to Kansas City!

3/30/2010 7:40:57 AM


Interesting . . . sounds like bullshit, to me.

3/30/2010 7:43:31 AM

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