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Quote# 73005

[In response to an article about a man who claims that he has not had food or water for 70 years]

I can't believe you are being so close-minded about this! Sure, a lot of breatharians have proven to be hoaxers, but perhaps this man is getting nutrition from a secret government ray that is being tested by the military.

It's well established that breatharians are more likely to occur near top secret UK army bases (if you filter out the hoax breatharians). Furthermore, in recent years, armies have openly demonstrated food-based technology like the US MRE program, which only makes my "food ray" hypothesis more likely.

A highly respected government lab in France has done some tests on this man's hair, and found nodes! Nodes! Do you realise the implications?

What's more, this research has been replicated by other top labs (Cal Tech, Nobel Institute University of Science, Oxon University etc.) so you can't simply dismiss the weight of evidence. Plus, I have personally interviewed a top physicist who witnessed an unexplained ray and then didn't feel hungry for over ten hours.

Don't get me wrong, I welcome respectful inquiry into the exact nature of this man's amazing powers. But what I don't welcome is name-calling, or any suggestion that he might not have amazing powers. That is beyond the realm of reasonable debate.

It's fascinating that certain "forbidden" topics, dismissed in academia, are also dismissed in cyberspace!

dripgrind, boingboing 39 Comments [5/18/2010 2:48:06 PM]
Fundie Index: 29
WTF?! || meh
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Green

Pretty certain this is a Poe.

5/18/2010 3:09:19 PM

Smilodon

If he's getting nourishment from a "nutrition ray" then he's not a breatharian.

5/18/2010 3:29:34 PM

oop

Nutrition ray? No wonder it's so damn hard for me to lose weight!

5/18/2010 4:01:32 PM



I seem to recall a case of a little girl whose parents put her on tour and claimed that she hadn't eaten and drank anything in several years. The claim was put to the test when the little girl was held in a lab and supervised. Yeah, she died of dehydration shortly thereafter and her parents were sued for the hoax (this was around the late 1800's/early 1900's).

There is a creature out that actually doesn't require food or water. Oh yes. It's a type of sea slug that blurs the line between plant and animal by having chloroplasts. No fooling. So, yeah, sunlight is a real "food ray", but animals (with exceptions like that) can't receive it.

5/18/2010 4:52:16 PM

Zipperback

But, nodes!

Come on guys. Nodes!

5/18/2010 5:10:26 PM

Lucilius

"It's fascinating that certain 'forbidden' topics, dismissed in academia, are also dismissed in cyberspace!"

Yes, it is fascinating that there are also some sane people in cyberspace.

5/18/2010 5:35:19 PM

perdurabo

Does that "ray" come in pizza flavor?

5/18/2010 6:39:16 PM

Agnostic Jew

I practice breatharianism for about 8 hours each night. Yep, I don't eat or drink while I'm sleeping (although I think I may have swallowed a bug once--does that count as eating?) Hey, I'm a breatharian by night and a Jew by day! Who'da thunk it?

5/18/2010 7:44:43 PM

nazani14

When I was in the Army I sometimes ate MREs (Meals, Rejected by Ethiopians.) I wouldn't doubt that those packets of glop had nodes in them.
I think Mr. dripgrind has spent some time in the side lobes of a ground surveillance radar.

5/18/2010 8:15:10 PM

Rumpshaker Slim

Cyberspace? is it 1998?

Odd that he didn't link to Cal Tech's "food ray" research.

5/18/2010 8:50:26 PM

Joshi

Do you guys need a sarcmark to tell what this is?

Come on, why is such an obvious joke on here?

5/18/2010 9:15:41 PM

Evil European Atheist

It is fascinating to see, thanks the Internet, how many gullible men exist worldwide.
This guy is just an imposter and his claim a hoax.
Seriously.

5/18/2010 11:20:13 PM



Filter out the hoax breatharians and all you're left with are corpses.

5/18/2010 11:28:34 PM

Jesus Christ Himself

This is clearly satire.

5/18/2010 11:51:32 PM

Exatron

This "food ray" is a guy named Ray who serves food, isn't it?

5/19/2010 12:36:17 AM

Tolpuddle Martyr


[size=30]TEHY CAN NOT HAZ MY NODEZ!!!11!1![/size]

5/19/2010 5:08:38 AM

Azotadeth

Oh come on, this is SO clearly a troll its not even funny.

5/19/2010 5:13:18 AM



Of course, without solid evidence, I call it BULLSHIT.

5/19/2010 6:06:22 AM



...Don't have kids. We don't need your genes.

5/19/2010 7:15:51 AM

Reginald Thamex

It's no good being close minded about these things. Temporal gratuities aside, those ancient wise women of Genoa, implicated as they were in dramatic pan-Serbian contretemps, didn't, as has been suggested, foresee the horrendous monkey-business to come, concerning the future air-bases of Belgium.

Brimming with over-confidence, the Marshall of the One-World-Order advance scouting party, predicted that his present would've been over-looked by the explorers of psychic winds in his, the Marshall's, past.

Regardless, Jeremy Fitzgerald declared himself to be dead from a biological point of view in that he hadn't partaken of any food, water or air for the past 640 years. Failure to realise the significance of this, has left President Kennedy (not THE President Kennedy, he's dead) selling milkshakes to the Albanians.

5/19/2010 7:45:38 AM

FSMpirate

Oh no! They found out about my secret government issued nutrition device. It's not really a ray gun, to speak of. More of a secret nutrition meat-tube assembly... for putting the nutrients where they belong, of course.

5/19/2010 9:52:33 AM

aaa

Either you smoke weed way too much or you are just fucking with us.

5/19/2010 9:56:47 AM

Doubting Thomas

"Furthermore, in recent years, armies have openly demonstrated food-based technology like the US MRE program, which only makes my "food ray" hypothesis more likely."

So, the fact that the militaries of different countries are working on making MRE's means they've developed a "nutrition ray?" Quite a leap of logic.

"Plus, I have personally interviewed a top physicist who witnessed an unexplained ray and then didn't feel hungry for over ten hours. "

Exactly how do you witness an "unexplained ray?" And not feeling hungry for 10 hours really isn't that unusual. If you get busy working on something and don't think about food you can do it easily.

Oh and all "breatharians" are hoaxers. It's simply not possible to watch someone closely for years to make sure they're not sneaking food, unless you lock them in a jail cell.

5/19/2010 10:29:59 AM

jsonitsac

Poe, but a funny one at that.

5/19/2010 11:36:43 AM



"A highly respected government lab in France has done some tests on this man's hair, and found nodes! Nodes! Do you realise the implications?"

I uh...no. No I don't.

5/19/2010 12:41:54 PM
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