Quote# 74052
Neal Horsley: "Before I surrendered myself to the Lord Jesus Christ, I was an absolute hedonist. I smoked dope, I did everything that might feel good.... Hey, Alan, if you want to accuse me of having sex when I was a fool, I did everything that crossed my mind that looked like I..."
Alan Colmes: "You had sex with animals?"
NH: "Absolutely. I was a fool."
AC: "You had sex with animals?"
NH: "When you grow up on a farm in Georgia, your first girlfriend is a mule."
AC: "Ah, I'm not so sure that that is so...."
NH: "That's because you didn't grow up on a farm in Georgia. The fact of the matter is if they have....don't know that you experiment with anything that moves when you are growing up sexually. You're naive. You know better than that... If it's warm and it's damp and it vibrates you might in fact have sex with it."
Neal Horsley,
The Alan Colmes Show 80 Comments [6/27/2010 1:00:54 PM]
Fundie Index: 124
Submitted By: Night Jaguar
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#1172436
Street Sharks
Old but funny.
Anytime I see Horsley on youtube, or read about him or something..... I immediately think to myself "MULE FUCKER".
6/27/2010 1:10:43 PM
#1172437
Cy
This is either a prime example of lying for Jesus or a prime example of that subset of fundies which assumes all atheists are immoral because if they didn't have an imaginary threat dangling over their heads to make them behave they'd have no moral standards at all.
6/27/2010 1:11:07 PM
#1172438
clockworkgirl21
I've lived on a farm for 10 years. I've never fucked an animal.
You fail.
6/27/2010 1:12:28 PM
#1172439
Kat
1. TMI - Why would you share this on national TV no less?
2. Not all farmers have sex with their livestock.
3. You are giving people from Georgia and other areas of the South a bad image.
6/27/2010 1:14:58 PM
#1172441
dynadin
I am from Georgia...south Georgia even...born and raised on a farm...and never once felt the need to sodomize any of the animals my family and I raised. My first girlfriend was indeed a cold hearted harpie, but she was not a mule. Mr. Horsley, you need serious psychological help.
6/27/2010 1:19:20 PM
#1172443
Uncle Bubba
@ Kat
3. You are giving people from Georgia and other areas of the South a bad image.
Well, DUH!
Everbody knows y'all sposed to do it with fambly members furst. How else ya gonna pick the right spouse?
'Sides, doin' the animals is mostly jest to prove they ain't no sech thang as evolution.
6/27/2010 1:23:50 PM
#1172445
D Laurier
This is just bizzare.
I did know people who used their livestock for sexual gratification.
They were all christians though, They all went to church on sunday, prayed before every meal, and married their cousins.
6/27/2010 1:25:20 PM
#1172450
What I find ironic is Neil's last name.
6/27/2010 1:36:38 PM
#1172451
Shanya Almafeta
Isn't this a repost?
6/27/2010 1:36:52 PM
#1172452
phaeton
Horsley, heh.
6/27/2010 1:38:19 PM
#1172460
myheadhurts
excuse me while I go throw up...
6/27/2010 1:49:25 PM
#1172466
I read about the afterlife
Hahaha. his last name is Horsley and he has sex with mules.
6/27/2010 2:07:17 PM
#1172470
What'd I Do
I literally grew up on a farm in Georgia. I never had a girlfriend, but my first boyfriend was a 10th-grader. I never shtupped the livestock. What.
6/27/2010 2:20:34 PM
#1172473
TGRwulf
LOL. This is amusing beyond words.
6/27/2010 2:22:48 PM
#1172476
Captain Janeway
What...the....fuck.......
6/27/2010 2:30:51 PM
#1172477
Allegory for Jesus
"If it's warm and it's damp and it vibrates you might in fact have sex with it."
Quoted for truth!
I'm pretty sure that the rest of what he is saying is bullshit though. Or, muleshit as the case may be.
6/27/2010 2:31:40 PM
#1172479
Tearlich
I'm at a loss For Wods!
6/27/2010 2:44:14 PM
#1172487
Rat of Steel
Not being a /b/tard, I'm not always up to date on what's "in" and what's "out" regarding Internet memes, so I'll ask straight away.
Am I right in thinking that this is an ideal place for a resounding "WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN"?
6/27/2010 2:51:12 PM
#1172488
Imroy
I think this is one of those times when a fundie tries to glorify their religious beliefs by contrasting it with how bad they were before. They think they're making a great argument that trumps everything but just end up making a fool of themselves.
6/27/2010 2:54:52 PM
#1172490
Old Viking
Head. Messed up.
6/27/2010 3:01:40 PM
#1172492
Horsefeathers
Holy hell...
For more of Horsley's exploits (non-animal related), check out the
Wikipedia article on him.
6/27/2010 3:04:48 PM
#1172495
vampirehummingbird
So your sisters were always able to outrun you?
6/27/2010 3:14:14 PM
#1172501
Doctor Whom
To Neal, this says a lot about non-Christians. To me, it says a lot about Neal.
6/27/2010 3:23:04 PM
#1172503
It's shit like this that makes me automatically think, "No you weren't you fucking liar," when I hear, "I used to be an atheist, just like you! I know how it is."
6/27/2010 3:24:23 PM
#1172511
DevilsChaplain
Gross but not really fundie.
6/27/2010 3:32:00 PM
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