Jon Knudsen #fundie

Jon Knudsen #fundie cphpost.dk

Jon Knudsen, the pastor of the Løkken Free Church in the Jutland town of Vendsyssel, loves Christmas, but he hates elves.

This weekend, Knudsen’s hatred for the creature he says “comes from the devil” manifested itself in the form of a mock execution by hanging of a Christmas elf outside his church.

Around the elf’s neck was a sign reading “we reject Satan and all his works and all his empty promises”, a reference to the Christian baptism rite.

Knudsen said decorating with elves at Christmas was “comparable to decorating with Nazi flags”, and described elves of all sorts as “poltergeists that come from the devil and make children sick”.

63 comments

old comment by Horsefeathers

"This weekend, Knudsen’s hatred for the creature he says “comes from the devil” manifested itself in the form of a mock execution by hanging of a Christmas elf outside his church."

Well, at least you didn't string up Old Saint Nick. You would have had a riot of small children kicking your ass.

"Around the elf’s neck was a sign reading “we reject Satan and all his works and all his empty promises”, a reference to the Christian baptism rite."

Uh. Ok.

What's the matter, you couldn't find any witches around? Isn't this what people like you used to do to them. And "heretics." And "blasphemers." Guess you're reduced to hanging effigies of imaginary creatures now.

How sad.

"Knudsen said decorating with elves at Christmas was “comparable to decorating with Nazi flags”, and described elves of all sorts as “poltergeists that come from the devil and make children sick”."

I do believe this is the first Godwin I've seen with a Christmas theme. Congratulations for being original at least.

However, elves aren't poltergeists. Ask the Ghostbusters. They'll explain the difference. For Elf troubles you need a whole other kind of extermination service.

I thought everyone knew that.

old comment by Anon-e-moose

"Jon Knudsen, the pastor of the Løkken Free Church in the Jutland town of Vendsyssel, loves Christmas, but he hates elves.

This weekend, Knudsen’s hatred for the creature he says “comes from the devil” manifested itself in the form of a mock execution by hanging of a Christmas elf outside his church."

So even in the haven of hyper-tolerance that is Denmark, fundieism exists. I'm just surprised Knutsen has the time so string up elf figures, what with all the guilt-free sex going on in that country you'd think he'd be protesting against, eh?

When he's putting those pieces of string round the necks of said figures, shouldn't he stop & think 'What the fuck am I doing with my life?!'

Knutsy-boy had better not hear about Wendy & Richard Pini's "ElfQuest", if he knows what's good for him.

image

@shadkat

"Hahahawhat. Elves are Serious Business guys.

It'd only antagonize him, but it'd be awesome to get a bunch of kids dressed as elves to go caroling in front of his house."

I don't think that would be good for his elf. If he came to the UK, his presence (and no doubt his activities) here would soon be brought to the attention of the relevant government ministers at the Gnome Office.

old comment by SpukiKitty

"They're commin' to take me away, ha ha...they're commin' to take me away, ho ho...to the funny farm..."

I know! We'll get a bunch of really HAWT Gay men of the femmy variety....have them dress as Legolas, Elrond, Oberon, Jareth The Goblin, the guys from ElfQuest & every other photogenic male Elf/Faerie-type character...have them "heat up the snow" in this nut's front yard...Then conclude the red-hot Gay-Fairy Bishounen love-fest with a hoard of kiddos & little people dressed in cheesy elf garb who knock this guy over, stuff his face with Keebler cookies, then yank out his teeth Hermey-style!
This Holiday Elvin Fantasy Rainbow-Fest will make this Knudsen guy drop dead from a brain anuyerism.

old comment by breakerslion

1. First things first: BWAHAHAHAHA!

2. I think this guy might be confused and have a guilty crush on Elvira.

3 Dear Old Knudsen: (http://www.blogger.com/profile/05939476225847425724) Black sheep of the family?

4. If this is the way he goes on about Santa's elves, he must go ballistic when he sees a garden gnome.

5. That's the problem with impugning a fictional being, they can't fight back.

6. So where do you find Nazi flags this time of year? I was thinking of serving chilled monkey brains for Christmas dinner, in traditional fashion of course, and those flags would just make a stunning table cloth!

I could go on...

Look, if the craziest person in the room gets to define reality, I think they deserve some competition.

old comment by Anon-e-moose

@Iczer-four

Indeed. Or like Princess Abriel Nei Debrusc Borl Paryun Lafiel, commander of the Abh* Assault Ship Basroil:

image

Okay, so they're genetically engineered humans - who ultimately became superior to their creators, and advanced to the extent that they became all-conquering (but any planet who submits to their will are assimilated into Abh society). But hey, they like cats so they're not all bad, eh?

Ol' Knutsy-boy had better not watch the anime series "Banner/Crest of the Stars" if he knows what's good for him. Why, compared to elves of Terran Nordic folklore, he'd find these space elves positively Abh-ominable.

*- Imagine "ST"'s Romulans, but more like a cross-between WH40K's Eldar and Tau.

Jon Knudsen #fundie cphpost.dk

63 comments

Confused?