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Quote# 79203

There is no such thing as human invention. Only rediscovery.

As it is written: "there is no new thing under the sun." (Ecclesiastes 1:9)

"Is there any thing whereof it may be said, See, this is new? it hath been already of old time, which was before us." -- Ecclesiastes 1:10

I believe the angels invented the telescope. Good luck arresting them: it is you who are in bonds, chained to the Earth.

However, if man did invent the telescope, good luck arresting the dead ancients who possessed crystal lenses.

Agonaces of Susa, Christian Forums 59 Comments [2/3/2011 6:24:52 AM]
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Doctor Whom

Obvious troll is obvious. The use of Scripture would make the folks at Landover Baptist proud, though.

2/3/2011 6:30:55 AM

nutbunny

Why are there people arresting the inventors of the telescope? I am not understand

2/3/2011 6:35:29 AM



Somebody shoulda pulled a gun on that Ecclesiastes dude. Got all Indy on his bronze-age ass.

2/3/2011 7:13:16 AM



Just got the mental image of an angel being booked in a police station...

"What the hell man, I'm a freaking angel!"

"Well, tough guy, you should have thought about that BEFORE inventing the telescope."

"What!?!"

2/3/2011 7:14:32 AM

Xotan

I wonder do shortsighted angels go to the same opthalmologist as I do?

2/3/2011 7:17:31 AM

John

The bronze age Arabs who wrote the OT probably honestly thought there was nothing new. Most people would have had no idea that life was any different before them than it was in their own time.

2/3/2011 7:23:29 AM

Doubting Thomas

??? Who said anything about arresting people? And why would you want to arrest the inventor of anything?

And my irony meter blew when it realized you typed this post using a computer invented by humans. I don't remember silicon microchips being mentioned in the bible.

2/3/2011 7:28:08 AM

perdurabo

I'm with DT on this one.....Please offer up an example of a silicon microchip from biblical times, or STFU.

2/3/2011 7:43:29 AM

Jezebel's Evil Sister

WTF? Inventing telescopes is a crime subject to arrest now?

BTW, do you suppose the angels also invented the Internet?

2/3/2011 7:58:06 AM

Jezebel's Evil Sister

"Everything that can be invented has been invented." — Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. patent office, 1899 (attributed)

2/3/2011 8:02:05 AM

Anon-e-moose

"There is no such thing as human invention. Only rediscovery."

The legal departments of Microsoft (Windows) and Pfizer (Viagra) et al would like a word with you, Ignorance of Suza.

"As it is written: "there is no new thing under the sun." (Ecclesiastes 1:9)"

So why didn't the Bible describe in detail computer OSs (originally conceived by Alan Turing), telecommunications satellites (Arthur C. Clarke), Jet engines (Frank Whittle), Rocketry (ancient Chinese, Goddard, von Braun etc), radio transmitters (Marconi), you name it?

"Is there any thing whereof it may be said, See, this is new? it hath been already of old time, which was before us." -- Ecclesiastes 1:10"

Does the Bible mention Viagra? If not, then you've destroyed your own argument.

"I believe the angels invented the telescope. Good luck arresting them: it is you who are in bonds, chained to the Earth."

I know the telescope was an invention of Galileo. And like I say, the legal departments of the companies who have developed new inventions would like a word with you.

"However, if man did invent the telescope, good luck arresting the dead ancients who possessed crystal lenses."

One Word: Glass. Oh, and ever hear of radio telescopes? Jodrell Bank (UK), Arecibo (Puerto Rico) etc.

I love the smell of annihilated arguments in the morning. Smells like victory.

2/3/2011 8:16:34 AM

breakerslion

A Canticle for Liebowitz is not historically accurate any more than The Flintstones is. On a related note, I believe the Proctoscope was invented by Jerry Mahoney, Paul Winchell's ventriloquist dummy. You will never convince me otherwise. Is it time for meds yet?

2/3/2011 8:17:38 AM

KR

So, you admit you don't know who invented the telescope. Also, why in the world should the inventor of the telescope be arrested? You guys are dumb as fuck.

As it is written: "there is no new thing under the sun." Fundies still continue to roam around with almost zero brains.

2/3/2011 8:21:43 AM

farpadokly

2 milliseconds on the internet reveals the inventor of the telescope: "Hans Lippershey, 1608". They did have lenses in the ancient world, but they didn't use them in telescopes.
"Good luck arresting the angels; it is you who are in bonds, chained to the Earth." But we're not chained to the Earth. Here are two other inventions you may not have heard of; aeroplanes and space shuttles. Or were they invented by angels as well?

2/3/2011 8:45:00 AM

Skyknight

For those of you wondering what the arrest comment is about, this is what immediately preceded it:

Agonaces:
"Scientists are blind; natural philosophers not quite so.

"Scientists are looking through the wrong end of the telescope with the lens cap still on and telling us what they imagine they see.

"All they really need to do is read the Bible."

Nathan Poe:
"Wouldn't that be akin to smashing the telescope and arresting the man who invented it?"

2/3/2011 9:45:16 AM

David B.

"As it is written: "there is no new thing under the sun." (Ecclesiastes 1:9)"

Funny, it is also written in that same book that God made the sun on 4th day and all living creatures, including man afterwards. So in fact everything that crawls, hops, swims or walks under the sun would be 'new'.

2/3/2011 9:53:16 AM

Headache

"...good luck arresting the dead ancients who possessed crystal lenses."

But I use radio telescopes for my research, no lenses...

2/3/2011 11:11:04 AM

Canadia

I wonder how NASA dealt with that 'chained to the earth' stuff?

2/3/2011 11:41:05 AM

Navelgazer

Let me get this straight...this quote was written this year?

2011?

not 1102?

2/3/2011 11:44:01 AM

cag

Well, if you wanna get that technical about it, under has no real meaning when it comes to the void of space. So yeah, say hello to a metaphor Susa, looking the bible for actual facts instead of, you know, researching it is clearly how we got to the moon.

2/3/2011 11:47:00 AM

Brendan Rizzo

Okay. Show us the archaeological evidence of angelic telescopes. Lenses appearing in the ruins of ancient cities would be sufficient. So, show us! I'm waiting.

And what does arresting the inventors of the telescope have to do with this? Why is that even necessary? Was Kepler arrested for his telescope? Was the actual inventor arrested? I think not.

And, (though I rarely make this comparison, here it is in earnest), I think that you may need to check in to a mental hospital.

2/3/2011 11:57:15 AM

TGRwulf

This has to be a poe. That grammer, punctuation, and spelling are just too good.

2/3/2011 12:18:18 PM

Dr. Steve Brule

Wat?

Is it a Poe or is it just plain batshit crazy? The world will never know!

2/3/2011 12:34:22 PM



Cripes, Agonaces and AV1611VET are tag teaming on that thread. I'm surprised that it didn't reach Critical Stupid and collapse in on itself.

2/3/2011 12:42:01 PM

GodotIsWaiting4U

Man did. Galileo.

Of course, the telescope isn't the only new invention; we have things like robots, computers, video game consoles, powered cars, etc.

2/3/2011 12:54:21 PM
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