I am often running late for work in the mornings, and as such, have precious little time to worry about breakfast. As a result, I find myself eating 'on the go' in my car en route to the office.
This morning, my fruit of choice was a banana. I proceeded to eat my banana, but, not wanting to leave the empty banana skin in the automobile, I made a decision to dispose of it out of the passenger window - knowing that banana skins are fully biodegradable and that this as such (in my mind) doesn't count as littering (maybe a new discussion point?).
I'd have thrown it out of the drivers window, but didn't want to risk hitting a passing car.
So, I wound down the passenger window and threw the banana skin right out there. I used considerable force, in order to clear the interior of the car. It was just then, that I realised I was driving past a bus stop. And guess what was stood at the bus stop waiting (and thinking about white wimminz)?
Thats right, my fellow NMs. A NIGGER.
Although the banana skin did not hit the coon, it landed right at it's feet, and I took great delight in watching the ensuing chimpout from my rear view mirror as I cruised past.
I couldn't decide whether the nigger was uppity because I'd thrown a banana skin 'at' it, or whether it was simply the fact that the banana skin was EMPTY and the shitskin was expecting the fruit to still be inside (kind of like a form of early morning gibsmedat).
Either way, this still amuses me even now - especially as it was a completely unintentional coontact.
Winston Niggerton, Niggermania 47 Comments
[2/9/2011 5:52:01 AM]
Fundie Index: 73
a completely unintentional coontact
Oh how twee, it has its own jargon
2/9/2011 7:09:06 AM
So, I wound down the passenger window
Considering how old your car would have to be to still having windows that require manual winding down, and how big cars that old tend to be, and you claim you did this in motion?
I wish you'd wrecked, and that both the other driver and the cop who reported to the scene had been black.
2/9/2011 7:47:50 AM
The simple fact that you called a black man "it" shows that you have absolutely no redeeming qualities whatsoever and need to die in a fire. Immediately.
And what is this, white supremacist porn? I can imagine the writer and others reading stories like this while stroking it.
2/9/2011 7:48:19 AM
So, biodegradable doesn't count as littering?That's about the dumbest non-racial thing I've read at RSTDT.
2/9/2011 8:07:21 AM
Bizzare terms that are not english... and some are not even language.
2/9/2011 8:18:03 AM
To be fair, you could tone this down a little and you would have the same joke thats been repeated by millions of sitcoms and stand up's.
2/9/2011 8:25:50 AM
OK. I suppose even wank-stains with low self esteem and even lower intelligence have got to have some means of expressing what to them is I imagine considered to be side-splitting humour. Unfortunately though, it actually appears as the insane mutterings of a crab infested baboon or the degenerate screeching of a deleterious gibbon with piles.
2/9/2011 8:28:53 AM
Gimpo Pop Eyes
It's spiritually uplifting to know that even superior types such as Winston Niggerton still take the time to write about their mundane lives. Even to the extent of describing petty experiences, such as his boring account of eating whilst driving to work because of his tardiness. The trivia of superiors. What a heartening sequence of events to us mere mortals.
2/9/2011 8:40:04 AM
I refuse to believe that this is not a troll. If they really hated black people so much, why would they talk about them so often? Besides, this anecdote is obviously made up. It's so obvious.
2/9/2011 8:43:07 AM
The Grey Blob
I only know that were I to suddenly find myself a jungle savage transported to some distant God-forsaken continent. And were I suddenly to come upon the mighty explorer Winston Niggerton hacking his way through the dense foliage, I think I'd fall to my knees and begin praying to a mighty white God that has fallen from the skies. Well, either that, or I'd use his convenient presence to test the efficacy of my poison darts.
2/9/2011 8:47:40 AM
@ #1254584, BeemerRefugee1990: And for the EMTs that report to the scene to be black too.
2/9/2011 10:44:35 AM
"Considering how old your car would have to be to still having windows that require manual winding down, and how big cars that old tend to be, and you claim you did this in motion? "
a) language doesn't necessarily keep up with tech, nobody has "dialed" a phone in years
b) point a is moot, he didn't say he did it manually, an electric motor winds as much as a hand
2/9/2011 10:48:49 AM
You were a bloody unpolite person, whatever angle you look at. Get over.
2/9/2011 11:51:46 AM
Meh, It's like most stories that come from that site:
1. A likely fictional attempt by one ignorant moron to impress other ignorant morons
2. Even if it is true 90% of their stories are usually instigated from some completely dickish action of the moron protagonist.
2/9/2011 3:37:26 PM
I. Hate. You.
2/9/2011 3:40:55 PM
This entire website is purely a troll community collectively pissing themselves.
2/9/2011 4:57:25 PM
I rolled my eyes so hard after reading this that they turned into centrifuges.
2/9/2011 5:20:05 PM
Call me queasy rodent after reading this kind of BS. Utterly repulsive.
2/9/2011 11:18:02 PM
Reading through the thread, I'm rather convinced that there people are all trolls. However, I can't take that stance in good faith, knowing that these people truly exist to discriminate and humiliate(in their own minds) those whose only known difference is the color of their skin.
Oh god, I'm starting to question their logic...These morons don't HAVE any.
P.S. Is it wrong of me to be disgusted by these people, and fearful of what they might do because they believe they're superior because of a skin pigmentation? I mean, I've dealt with racists before, and it utterly confounds me how they can judge you solely on the color of your skin.
Betcha Winston would've paid it no mind if a white guy got huffy over the exact same incident.
2/9/2011 11:59:17 PM
Or, maybe this "nigger" thought of you as a moron, since you were throwing litter onto the street? I mean, it's not like you can wait until you get to work, and dispose the banana peel there, right?
What a douche you are.
2/10/2011 3:06:29 AM
How cute, a racist moron trying to be both funny and offensive and failing at both.
2/10/2011 3:47:04 AM
Do these people truly not see the irony in hanging out on a board called "Niggermania," and calling themselves "Niggermaniacs?"
I mean, I can't be the only one who reads that and gets the impression of people who are closeted lovers of blacks, right?
2/10/2011 6:33:48 AM
I'd rather be a Hulkamaniac.
2/10/2011 1:30:04 PM
2/11/2011 5:44:40 AM
Surely in this case, you are the "uncivillised" one? You can't manage time, can't give proper attention to the road while driving, can't grasp the concept of littering properly and can't wait to find a bin. You can't even throw a banana skin out of the passenger window without using "Considerable force".
With all those can't, it's no wonder you use "racial identity" as a crutch for your self esteem.
2/11/2011 3:27:04 PM