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Quote# 79619

Cecil left the hospital on a Wednesday and full recovery was an hour-by-hour situation. Some pains returned with constipation striking some fear into him. On Sunday morning Cecil began to see what the Lord was trying to show him and he began to do self-deliverance. The demons began to stir in his abominable area and actually “growled” as they were called out in the name of Jesus. After some 20 minutes of prayer and deliverance Cecil’s system “cleaned out” and he was back to normal. The next Sunday he again began self-deliverance and again there was intense growling and difficulty in expelling the demonic spirits, with gasping, throat trying to close, extreme gagging and coughing. But a number of demons came out.

Paul Nowlen, Free in the Lord Minisitries 94 Comments [2/22/2011 4:29:24 AM]
Fundie Index: 93
WTF?! || meh
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#1260074
elphada

Somebody tell me this is a joke.

2/23/2011 2:00:29 PM

#1260076
clockworkgirl21


2/23/2011 2:02:20 PM

#1260223
Dirty Homo

I took this whole thing as a masturbation joke.

2/24/2011 1:09:15 AM

#1260233
Raised by Horses

@Anon-e-moose

'kay... um..

We, the rest of the FSTDT community love you and all, but damn, your posts are TL;DR.

Let's not forget: Brevity is the soul of wit.

2/24/2011 3:07:16 AM

#1260417
Anon-e-moose

@Raised by Horses

"Let's not forget: Brevity is the soul of wit."

Good point - or in this case, the arsoul of wit.

...I'll get my coat.

X3

2/24/2011 9:42:14 AM

#1260570
Sionnach

Please help me my infant daughters diaper is full of demons. I can tell you for sure it's demons by the growls and horrifying odor. I'm so scared for her. I've been praying for an hour to the Almighty for deliverance but the diaper is still full. My poor baby must be full of these foul beasts because all she's done is cry and throw herself around. Send us your prayers and your money. It's the only way to ensure her salvation. Thank you. And Dog bleach you.

2/24/2011 3:58:43 PM

#1260720
bbqburrito

I can completely identify with this.
As a matter of fact, I had one of those shits just a couple of hours ago.

2/25/2011 7:18:38 AM

#1260967
truthinScience

"…he began to do self-deliverance." Is that fundie code for something else?

2/26/2011 3:21:44 AM

#1261211
Brendan Rizzo

@ Anon-e-moose:

How the hell do you manage to type posts that long? Even my longest posts were much shorter than that, and yet they were marked as spam (not to mention that they had no pictures.)

And how ironic that you mention Panty and Stocking... my friends have watched it, but I myself have not gotten around to it... hahaha!

2/26/2011 6:40:41 PM

#1261253
LB

Poop = demons?

Ah, this explains everything! All those demons and evil things the fundies claim to see on a regular basis... it's just because they're -regular-!

2/26/2011 8:37:21 PM

#1261541
Drax

Gotta be poe. But funny.

2/27/2011 3:45:41 PM

#1265488
Shadoboy

Those demons have a collective name: diharrea.

3/9/2011 11:51:53 PM

#1265584
Anon-e-moose

@Brendan Rizzo

"@ Anon-e-moose:

How the hell do you manage to type posts that long? Even my longest posts were much shorter than that, and yet they were marked as spam (not to mention that they had no pictures.)"

PROTIP: Type out your comment (say, on Notepad) beforehand. Post a certain amount of said text as normal. Then click 'Edit Comment' and copypasta the rest of your comment underneath your original text. Then click on 'Edit Comment' button. Et voila! Yours is now longer than before.

...and said post has your full comment too. X3

[/Finbarr Saunders]

A Gratuitous Double-Entendre a day keeps the seriousness away.

3/10/2011 9:49:07 AM

#1302136
Quantum Mechanic

Miralax would have helped.

6/23/2011 12:54:33 AM

#1302138


Where those the demons of Saturday night bingedrinking and junkfood-eating?

6/23/2011 1:04:19 AM

#1368199
Eniliad

Hey, if I were constipated, the sudden relief would sure as hell FEEL like demons coming out. Doesn't mean they are, of course.

1/21/2012 5:49:42 PM

#1368232
Justanotheratheist

So demons are just a load of shit.

Just as I had suspected all along.

1/21/2012 10:30:52 PM

#1369551
Quantum Mechanic

"abominable area"

Indeed.

Gene pool needs more chlorine.

1/27/2012 11:08:31 AM

#1452193
VioletBeauregarde

Paul, sweetie, that "demonic growling" was bowel sounds!

9/27/2012 1:13:50 PM
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