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The "Try, Try Again" Award

With at least 6 of these predictions already recorded on FSTDT, not one has been true yet.

Quote# 80554

(Manhattan to be hit by a dirty bomb in April 2011)

We now calculate that Manhattan in the US will be hit by fire from the heavens resulting from a bomb which produces a mushroom cloud rising from the sea on 2010VeAdar28-29=2011Nisan4-5 (2011April7-9)

Here are the first verses of 1 Kings 17 and 1 Kings 18...

1 And Elijah [Gordon], the Tishbite from the inhabitants of Gilead proceeded to say to Ahab: As Jehovah the God of Israel before whom I do stand is living, there will occur during these years neither dew [water baptism from the earth] nor rain [spirit baptism from the heavens], except at the order of my word! (1 Kings 17).

The account runs from 1 Kings 17:1 to 1 Kings 18:46. It is the story of who can bring fire to the bull and actually rain to the land. Is it the prophets of Baal with their wonderful fire then rain dance? or is it Elijah and his God? Therefore the drought must start on 2001Tishri30 (or 7 days later). This was the day that Paul Gillies, the UK Watchtower press officer wrote to the UK Guardian newspaper confirming that the Watchtower was unrepentant for their UN NGO idolatry.

The greater meaning of this contest is who can predict terrorism and who can water baptise, Elijah or the prophets of Baal? In fact the one who can predict terrorism, is the one who can water baptise. The one who can bring fire can bring rain. To the Phoenicians and the Philistines and idolaters in Israel, Baal was the God of fertility (human and agricultural) and therefore he could bring rain clouds which caused agricultural fertility. So this was a contest designed to show up Baal as a false God. The prophets of Baal are Christians who are more interested in congregation fertility than scriptural truth. They are the bean counters, the bureaucrats, the target setters, the pharisees of the church.

truebiblecode, True Bible Code 48 Comments [4/10/2011 5:49:57 AM]
Fundie Index: 61
WTF?! || meh
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checkmate

The greater meaning of this contest is who can predict terrorism and who can water baptise, Elijah or the prophets of Baal? In fact the one who can predict terrorism, is the one who can water baptise. The one who can bring fire can bring rain. To the Phoenicians and the Philistines and idolaters in Israel, Baal was the God of fertility (human and agricultural) and therefore he could bring rain clouds which caused agricultural fertility. So this was a contest designed to show up Baal as a false God. The prophets of Baal ...

Hey dude, see a doctor. Quickly.

That's some really serious brain warp.

Wow.

4/10/2011 12:57:00 PM

Old Viking

What's a Tishbite? If it has anything to do with sex, please respond promptly.

4/10/2011 1:42:51 PM

SeekerLancer

Dirty bombs aren't atom bombs they don't produce giant mushroom clouds you nitwit.

4/10/2011 1:43:02 PM



It's Sunday April 10th already. WRONG!!!!

4/10/2011 2:00:29 PM

solomongrundy

Jeremiah 14:14
Then the LORD said to me, “The prophets are prophesying lies in my name. I have not sent them or appointed them or spoken to them. They are prophesying to you false visions, divinations, idolatries and the delusions of their own minds.


Heh. If there was anything to his 'beliefs' I'd tell truebiblecode to pack plenty of sun-screen bearing in mind where he's supposedly heading but sad to say he'll just moulder in the grave like the rest of us...

4/10/2011 2:02:20 PM

Berny

Is Manhattan a radioactive crater or did I miss something?
Fail again, True Bible Code(TM).
I think you guys need a new Bible decoder ring.

4/10/2011 2:03:05 PM

freako104

And I doubt it will happen. I wonder when they'll stop this shit

4/10/2011 2:50:01 PM

TWoozl

Must have been a pretty weak bomb. Manhattan clearly didn't notice it's now a day overdue for a "mushroom cloud" (Pro-tip to professional faith-scaremongers-- er, prophets: Only nukes and absolutely massive conventional blasts make a mushroom cloud. Dirty bombs as a rule, are only slightly more powerful than a hand grenade).

4/10/2011 3:24:14 PM

SpukiKitty

Don't these nincompoops actually read their own scripture? Sure, they'll drink in the "God as scary warlord of doom" stuff....yet they'll completely ignore the "God is an unconditionally loving Parent who cares for us/Peace and love quasi-proto-hippie Jesus guy" AND "Noone knows the day or the hour, not I (Jesus) nor the angels in Heaven, but my Father only". What a bunch on petulant babies!

4/10/2011 3:39:37 PM

randomguy

Deuteronomy 18:20-22
But the prophet, which shall presume to speak a word in my name, which I have not commanded him to speak, or that shall speak in the name of other gods, even that prophet shall die.

And if thou say in thine heart, How shall we know the word which the LORD hath not spoken?

When a prophet speaketh in the name of the LORD, if the thing follow not, nor come to pass, that is the thing which the LORD hath not spoken

4/10/2011 3:41:54 PM

tmarcl

Much as everyone else has pointed out, it is now 10 April 2011. Manhattan is still there, and no reports of an atomic bomb, a dirty bomb, or any other bombs. Except maybe on Broadway. I didn't check the arts and entertainment section...

4/10/2011 4:14:42 PM

Nowonmai

Swing and a miss yet again!

4/10/2011 4:47:20 PM

Osiris

Just. I have no idea. What's worse? Reading the Bible, or reading people's half-baked, drug-fueled interpretations of the Bible?

4/10/2011 6:27:07 PM

Headache

We now calculate...

LOLLERCOPTER!11!

Would that calculation consist of pulling small plastic numbers out of a dark and damp place?

4/10/2011 7:33:42 PM

Prager

Wrong...again!

4/11/2011 12:23:38 AM

Mapar

I love the smell of kookery in the morning...

4/11/2011 8:55:13 AM

SpukiKitty

....it smells like...chicken.

4/11/2011 10:34:53 AM

breakerslion

Imagine that! Still drooling in awe of ancient bullshit parlor magic.

@ Woody:

Hardly.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Disappointment

... And Moab, Son of Rhubab and Douchebab, did place his finger within his nose, and finding naught, even unto the furthest reaches of his cranium, declared that forever after men would read smegma written in stale Jacobean English and be strangely impressed.

4/11/2011 12:27:47 PM

nazani14

Dew doesn't come from the earth, you nitwit. It condenses from the atmosphere.

Terrorism is never mentioned in the bible at all. That's because normal warfare included slaughtering civilians. I don't know if the priests of Baal made blood sacrifices, but they couldn't have been more like terrorists than King David.

4/11/2011 12:45:23 PM

Iczer-four

Still here.. Please try Again..

4/12/2011 12:14:23 PM

Kevin Klawitter

I E-mailed the website, pointing out that a dirty bomb did not, in fact, go off when they predicted, asking whether or not they made a mistake in their prediction. This is their response:


It was our 268th mistake!

Keeps on aksing and ye shall receive.

Blessings

Gordon Ritchie
Lords' Witnesses

4/13/2011 12:16:14 PM

Zits

Justin Bieber sang somewhere in New York. Its been catastrophically bombed.

4/19/2011 10:07:45 PM

harpoon

All that exists is derived from a single Divine, source--Almighty God. God is at once the entire universe and transcends the universe as well. All that exists is God; God is all that exists, within my being. God is absolute Good and everywhere present. God is the origin and creator of all; there is no other enduring power. There is only one power and one presence active in my life, God the Good, the Omnipotent. I love you God; Thank-you God for loving me.

5/19/2012 4:48:01 PM
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