Tea Party Patriot #fundie

Tea Party Patriot #fundie libertydwells.com

[Lindsey Graham wants to make Koran desecration a criminal offense because "we're in a war."]

A limited police action maybe, a kenitic military campaign, a protracted counter-insurgency, a meals on wheels humanitarian venture, a struggle for hearts and minds, a misguided feel-good demonstration of tolerating the intollerable... whatever it is we are doing in Iraq, Afghanistan and now Libya - it is most definately not war.

If we were at war then by October 2001 every radical Muslim would be dead or staggering around on radioactive deserts of molten glass like nomadic zombies. Gas would be $1.05 at the pump, unemployment would be non-existent and an army of Christion missionaries would be bringing a billion lost souls to Jesus Christ throughout the middle east. We would be experiencing a new baby boom of optimism in America instead of the government shutting down because one side wants to use tax dollars to fund poet cowboys and killing unborn children.

70 comments

old comment by Raised by Horses

Another dewy-eyed Tea Party nut living in fantasy land. Originality just doesn't run deep in fundies, now does it?

Aside from all the other idiocy in this post: No, there would be no "radioactive deserts of molten glass" even if the U.S. ramped up the military might of its operations, mostly because it would face censure from every other nation on the planet because of it.

Oh, and then there's that whole "Nucular Winter" thingamajig that scientist types keep warning about, and no, regardless of what your addled fundie brain might desperately be trying to tell you, it will not be confined to the area of the bombing.

@Jack Bauer

You win one (1) Internets, good sir.

old comment by Anon-e-moose

Several years ago, a Baptist church near me closed - due to lack of interest.

Not long afterwards, the property's leaseholders began emptying out said church of it's now irrelevant contents and had hired a skip (US: Dumpster) to throw such into. Amongst said contents (pews etc) were a number of KJVs. Being the ecologically-minded person I am, I 'liberated' many of these KJVs and took them home.

They now reside in a cupboard. Under my sink. In the toilet area of my residence. These KJVs come in extremely handy when I've run out of bog roll. Is it my fault if those who make Bibles use a grade of paper that's sooooo absorbemt?!

So, said KJVs are recycled, and (when I run out of bog roll) my arsehole feels the benefit. From the point of view of this Atheist, these pointless articles at least serve a truly practical purpose.

And there's not one fucking thing you subhuman fundies can do about it. 'Burning Qurans'? Surely tearing pages out of Bibles and wiping the shit off my arse with them is an infinitely greater insult.

...oh, and those property owners? They leased said ex-Baptist church to a large brewery chain, who converted said former church into a pub. Which I visit occasionally for a libation or three. Cold beer. Good pub grub. Large plasma screens (especially for showing the big Premier League football games via Sky Sports). It's the only possible way I would enter such a place nowadays.

old comment by G.Fieendish

Where to begin with this lunatic`s rant...
Firstly, the cost of gasoline at the pump will not be $1.05 a gallon, as the poster asserts, but more likely
$105 per gallon, if you are lucky enough to get any....
(This is due to the U.S effectively destroying the majority of the Middle Eastern oil producing countries... As for the rest of the OPEC countries, can you say "Oil Embargo imposed on the United States...?").
Secondly, ever heard of "Nuclear Winter"...?
(In short, kiss goodbye to cheap food for at least 10 to 15 years, as every nation that exports food to the U.S, will cease to do so, as they will have problems feeding their own citizens, as the result of the above... Hint: expect mandatory food rationing in the U.S).
Thirdly, expect the U.S to become a "Pariah Nation", internationally, due to it's genocidal actions...

old comment by Drax

So much stupid.

"If we were at war then by October 2001 every radical Muslim would be dead or staggering around on radioactive deserts of molten glass like nomadic zombies."

So if you don't use nukes it's not a war? Guess Vietnam wasn't a war either then.

"Gas would be $1.05 at the pump,"

Um, no, the Middle East oilfields wouldn't be functioning if you'd just nuked the shit out of them.

"....and an army of Christion missionaries would be bringing a billion lost souls to Jesus Christ throughout the middle east."

Uh, no, you just nuked the fucking place, remember? Most of the people there are dead, and your missionaries would also likely die of radiation poisoning if they went there.

"We would be experiencing a new baby boom of optimism in America instead of the government shutting down because one side wants to use tax dollars to fund poet cowboys and killing unborn children."

A baby boom of optimism based on the fact you've just committed about the biggest act of genocide in history?

And, uh, do you really think the rest of the world would let the US get away with this?

old comment by Headache

Listening to US teanbaggers is like listening to members of the National Socialist Party of the late 1920's Germany.

The rhetoric is almost identical, the arguments modernized but the intentions the same, silence all opposition, ostracize divergent opinions and make it a them vs us topic.

German: Blond, blue eyed germanic looking humans are superior
Teabaggers: White christian Americans are superior (American exceptionalism, anti-anything not white and American)

Just like the Germans bought the nonsense, hook line and sinker, so are more and more Americans. To bad the country has never been big on learning from history or from anyone else because we know Americans are exceptional...

old comment by Amadaun

Koran desecration is mean and nasty. It shouldn't be illegal in the US, any more than desecration of Bible or flag should be, though I would be willing to accept a small 'being offensive' fine, I guess.

Tea Party here, on the other hand, is insane. That we did not commit to total war on people we probably shouldn't have been at war with in the first place (and the Afghanistan thing has...some justification, even in hindsight, better than, say, Korea, or Iraq) is a good thing. But Tea Party believes that we have enough more force than anyone to get away with anything, and that nukes are considerably less harmful than they actually are.

Look, Tea. If you...killed everyone who lives on the other side of your town and spread feces and offal all over their blown-up houses, what would the rest of town do to you? Even if you still had a lot more ammo for the guns you used to blow up across-town?

They would shoot you with their guns. Carefully. And they would not let you into the supermarket. And they would avoid you. And if you then held a stick-up at the supermarket you might get away with it once, and next time somebody would shoot you. Your ability to survive in society would be gone. (America is not self-sufficient, and while we might manage to survive if we had to, everything would be very expensive and the job market would...expand, but become full of menial tasks. Also, less food to go around.)

Also, any stuff of the across-town-neighbor's that you hadn't blown up would not automatically become yours, even if you wanted to drag it out and wash off the shit and rotting intestines.

Does this reduction of scale help you understand what you're suggesting?

old comment by David B.

I do so love it when these dyed-in-the-wool supporters of the free-market start whining about gas prices. Surely there is no better expression of free market economics than the oil-rich states pumping whatever amount of gas they want and charging whatever they think they can get for it?

If TPP here is so damn upset about gas prices, just don't buy their product. If enough people do that, demand will fall and they'll cut their prices, right? That's the Reaganonics answer after all, deregulate the producers and let the market find its own level.

So how about it, TPP? Are you and your tea-bagger friends going to start boycotting the pumps until the prices drop? I mean, the Tea Party is the "voice of real America(tm)" right? All that "speaking for the majority of Americans" you do should translate into some pretty concerted action, surely?

No?

Hmpf! Sometimes I suspect you only started calling yourself "tea-baggers" because you didn't know how to spell "douche"!

old comment by that dutch guy

so speaks the true "christion"

point is, we (all of the western world) are at war. it is just not a war of guns and nukes. it is a war fought in the minds of the common man, both muslim and western. every act of terrorism causes fear and panic (aka terror), and turns a part of the scared populace against the average muslim, who hasnt done anything and is just trying to get by like the rest of us. this proves to some of them that these "infidels"cant be trusted and are too dumb and bigoted for their own good, and so turns some af our allies into our enemies.

now add your "nuke and convert" policy into that picture. guess who benefits the most?
(hint: it aint us.)

old comment by GigaGuess

A limited police action maybe...
By use of military force.

...a kenitic military campaign, a protracted counter-insurgency...
Oh, semantics...

...a meals on wheels humanitarian venture...
A...what? You call running into their country, forcibly toppling their government, and plunging their country into anarchy, and deigning to stick around to help pick up the pieces WHAT now?! It's a humanitarian venture like the incarceration of the Japanese around WWII was assisting them to find housing.

...a struggle for hearts and minds...
Flat out bullshit.

a misguided feel-good demonstration of tolerating the intollerable...
Wat.

...whatever it is we are doing in Iraq, Afghanistan and now Libya - it is most definately not war.
Fine, it's waving your dicks around, reminding the world your the biggest, baddest sonuvabitch in the sandbox, flailing wildly, trying to reassert yourselves. Happy?

If we were at war then by October 2001 every radical Muslim would be dead or staggering around on radioactive deserts of molten glass like nomadic zombies.
Because the world would just stand by and watch a country nuke the fuck out of another, reducing it to a nuclear wasteland.

Gas would be $1.05 at the pump...
And how is this? You just nuked the biggest oil producers in the world, incinerating a large chunk of the reserves, and rendering the balance inaccessible, what with the nuclear fallout and shit like that. People tend to avoid going into places like that. Enjoy watching the price of gas climb and climb and climb.

...unemployment would be non-existent...
Because what? You'll have people over there cleaning up the environmental nightmare you would have created?

...and an army of Christion missionaries would be bringing a billion lost souls to Jesus Christ throughout the middle east.
What souls?! Here's the funny thing about nukes. THEY KILL PEOPLE! Most victims? Vaporized on the spot. They would be the lucky bastards. Then there would be the ones who would be left to die of nuclear poisoning. I'm sure they'll be more than happy to hear your message of peace and love as they're dying of...lessee...radiation burns? Cancer? Just to name the big two?

We would be experiencing a new baby boom of optimism in America instead of the government shutting down because one side wants to use tax dollars to fund poet cowboys and killing unborn children.
*Sigh* The arts are just as important part of any culture as anything else. Your military budget? About 20% of your budget, if Wikipedia is to be believed. Anything that would have been proposed for these "cowboy poets and baby-killers?" Would barely put a dent in that. Oh, and your outrage in aborting children while getting a hard on over the prospect of nuclear war is laughable, and shows a massive logical disconnect.

Tea Party Patriot #fundie libertydwells.com

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