Begin casting out each evil spirit by calling it by its demonic name or function. (Command demons to manifest and leave in Jesus’ name.) Contrary to popular belief, demons do not have hearing impairments. The power that dislodges demons is only found in the Mighty Name of Jesus Christ (Mark 16:17), not in the volume of our voices.
We take authority over every remaining demon from the Strongman on down to the lowest ranking demon, power & form and bind you all in Jesus’ Name. By binding, we mean that you are not to torment, hurt of harass ________. We loose sufficient numbers of Warrior Angels to put each of you in boxes, cages or caves 500,000 times too small and seal each box, cage, or cave with the Blood of our King, the Lord Jesus Christ (Joshua 10:17).
Angels, gag each remaining demon so that no communication can go on between them or any others. Angels, in Jesus’ Name, we assign you to read Scriptures to these demons on the Blood of Jesus, the Cross, their torment in the Lake of Fire to come, and any other passages that they hate to hear (Psalm 59:10; Heb 1:14). We pray, Lord Jesus, that your glorious light shine through each box, cage, or cave so the demons will have no rest. It is written, “There shall be no rest for the wicked!”
We loose ministering angels of Life, Health, Healing and Restoration into areas of ________’s body or soul where the ejected demons have done damage. We cover each of our families, properties & possessions with the Blood of Jesus Christ, and loose Warrior and Ministering Angels to protect us from any and all satanic & demonic backlash. In Jesus’ Precious and Almighty name we pray. Amen.
Pastor Win Worley, Hegewisch Baptist Church 48 Comments
[5/7/2011 10:51:48 AM]
Fundie Index: 58
Angels, in Jesus’ Name, we assign you to read Scriptures to these demons on the Blood of Jesus,...
So, now you're telling angels what to do?
5/7/2011 11:18:15 AM
In all of my years on this planet I have never been bothered by demons or spirits. Then again, I have never believed in them.
Do you understand what I'm trying to tell you, you superstitious moron?
5/7/2011 11:29:59 AM
Yeah, see, fighting demons is one of those jobs that looks cool on TV but is all procedure in real life. And this isn't even getting into the paperwork. You know St. Peter will want a copy of EVERYTHING.
5/7/2011 11:59:39 AM
I weep that sentient beings have this degree of credulity and ignorance
5/7/2011 12:15:43 PM
Not covered by most health insurance policies.
5/7/2011 12:17:53 PM
Pastor Win, in the enlightened, educated and secular world "demons and evil spirits" are in fact viruses, bacteria or perhaps mental illnesses. Just so you know.
5/7/2011 12:27:51 PM
He mentioned demons having hearing impairments. Thus, he is either a Poe or does not understand sarcasm.
5/7/2011 12:34:35 PM
@Brendan Rizzo: Or he is being sarcastic. I read it as saying "You don't need to yell to cast out demons, numbnuts."
5/7/2011 12:45:14 PM
There are no words.
5/7/2011 12:45:44 PM
Demons with hearing impairments? WTF??
5/7/2011 2:03:04 PM
Thank goodness for Pastor Win Worley and other like minded individuals. It's because of the Pastor's diligence, his magnificent efforts, and his teaching of how easy it is to thwart demons, that we have a world almost completely free of evil and sorrow. We owe you a great deal of thanks for your selfless dedication to conquering evil on our behalf and for creating an almost utopian world where we may dwell in peace. Thanks Pastor. Honestly, you do your God proud, and, trust me, nobody thinks you're even the slightest bit insane. Nobody at all. Gosh, I just can't help loving this earthly paradise.
5/7/2011 2:19:18 PM
Looking at his site, he has an entire section of essays lambasting witchcraft and the occult. I'm glad I had my irony meter turned off.
5/7/2011 2:38:30 PM
You don't tug on Superman's cape.
You don't spit into the wind.
You don't pull the mask off that old Lone Ranger,
And you don't mess around with Win.
5/7/2011 3:32:23 PM
I misread the source as Hedgewitch Baptist Church. What a disappointment! Still, in speech it sounds much the same.
5/7/2011 4:32:28 PM
I thought it was from Ministering Deliverance, then I saw it's from somewhere else, I can't believe there's another site like that.
5/7/2011 4:36:15 PM
If Jesus can cast out demons, why doesn't he just do it? Why do we have to ask him? If a kid can learn to put his bike away instead of leaving it in the driveway and throw his dirty underwear in the laundry basket without his mom asking him to, you'd think the Lord of the Universe would be at least that smart.
5/7/2011 4:48:26 PM
Whenever it is pointed out that those who do not believe in demon possesion are never troubled by demons, the standard bullshit excuse is that unbelievers are already under the control of Satan so he doesn't have to attack us. Those who are working for the Lord are a threat to Satan and that's why he attacks them.
5/7/2011 5:02:56 PM
Totally. Certifiably. Batshit. Insane.
5/7/2011 5:54:48 PM
Actual exrocisms do NOT work that way. In fact, calling out Jesus name will just agitate any spirit.
5/7/2011 6:16:30 PM
This guy probably looks down on the curandera who removes disease spirits by rubbing an egg on the sick person's belly.
More stupidity at their website:
5/7/2011 6:33:38 PM
These fundies jump all over themselves to believe in demons simply because demons are mentioned in the bible.
If the bible mentioned pogo sticks, they'd have us all hopping around day and night.
I'm just happy the bible doesn't mention fried liver for dinner.
5/7/2011 8:09:38 PM
Yes, but that only works with type I to III Demons. Once you get to Nalfeshnee and the other Type VIs and above, it gets trickier.
5/7/2011 9:34:26 PM
I have to admit I really like some of the details. The 500,000 times too small and the blood seals are almost snazzy.
5/8/2011 12:27:22 AM
And there are morons out there who will follow these instructions...
5/8/2011 12:43:31 AM
5/8/2011 1:07:18 AM