This morning, Norm Jr. (My 43 year old son who lives with me) awoke at 6:30 and quickly was involved with some retroparastalis activity (vomiting) which is so rare for him. This was probably the fifth time in his life to experience that horrible body function. Later today he said, "I think the Lord knew I would have had a hard time at work today and allowed this to happen. You know he sometime does mysterious things, his wonders to perform." Thank you again Lord for showing me your love and power through the life of Norm Jr.
33 comments
Oh, and Norm Sr? It's not parastalis, it's called "peristalsis." If you're going to try and look like a doctor, do it right. Oh wait, that's what fundies are good at, right? Failing to look like scientists?
My guess is that this Norm Jr. was nervous about something that was going to happen at work that day, and that is why he threw up. But hey, if throwing up is a miracle, then you can call my roommate Jesus.
... eh, he was nervous because it was his mom's birthday, only she was dead, and he didn't think he could deal with it. The person who's writing this is Norm Sr.
Onetime I had way too much to drink. In fact I could have died. As I began to pass out, I cried out God help me. I imeddiately began vomting thus clearing my system of the poisionus liqour. I challenge anyone to disprove this miracle of the risen lord. He shows us grace even through the most vile of bodily functions.
"Yahweh, have you ever considered compiling a list of all these great t-shirt ideas?"
Anything anyone writes is under the automatic copywrite, so you would need their permission to sell t-shirts with the quotes on them.
Good luck with that.
I think "Occam's Razor Disagrees" would have been the best award here. Edit: Didn't see the date =(
Still, let's not judge him for living with his dad when he's 43 - there are reasons he might being doing this other than the obvious.
Well, that'd be what I'd say if he didn't seem to think a hangover is divinely inspired.
I,too, have had, in my youthful past, many such vomitous mornings, usually around 2:30 a.m. after closing time. The days that I went to work anyway were, indeed, troublesome, until I could get the proper medication from Dr. Bud Weiser.
Oh cool. A 46 year old who's rarely ever vomited.
I upchucked gore when i was 16 and i learnt i had genetic chronic liver disease. Im now 18 waiting for a donor. I think i can take Norm Jr. in a fight. He'd probably cry and shit himself.
I hate people like this.
Poe.
And 11Dayo for the Win.
Hey you bunch of heartless, smart-asses if you actually knew Norm Jr., you would know that he has lived through a lifetime of hardship and disabilities. He's "mentally challenged" and can not take care of himself on his own, thus, he lives with his Dad, his mother has since passed. And he does worry about the small stuff because he honestly doesn't know any better and some situations he can't handle makes him sick. And the sick bastard who wrote he'd fight NJ, I'll take you on you jerk. I am his older female cousin and I'll take you on any day - you piece of human crap! How dare all of you - A pox upon your houses.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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